this is not a short story, get comfy.

My Story

The childhood from Hell

My childhood was custom made in hell. No one but the devil could have done

such a complete job. Let's start at the beginning.

I was born in Minneapolis Minnesota in 1959.

At the age of 18 mos. my parents divorced, and i moved to San Diego.

Mom didn't stay single long. She married my first step-dad, Ralph.

He was very abusive physically. I remember beatings, or standing in

a corner literally all day. He was also a pedofile, as he molested me,

he didn't rape me, but you couldn't have gotten any closer.

I was around 5 or 6 at the time. I now had a brother and sister.

I give my mom credit in that when i told her what was going on she

confronted him, he admitted it, no shame. So, she kicked him out.

It was very traumatic on my brother, to see his daddy leave.

I remember a scene, where he tried to leave with my brother and sister.

He didn't want them, just wanted to hurt my mother.

Mom told the police what he had done to me. They advised her

not to press charges, that it wouldn't stick in court.

That I and the family would be publicly humiliated. So after

the divorce was finalized, he left. He skipped to Florida, and left

us on welfare, refusing to pay support. Back then they got away

with it. We were poor. My kids find it hard to conceive the idea

of commodities, food boxes from church, and used toys.

Of having only 1 present for Christmas. But we were happy.

It was a time of peace and freedom for us kids.

Mom worked, we were wild. Lying, stealing, jealous of

other kids, of what they had. Mom started to take us to church.

That's when we first heard about Jesus, that someone loved us.

That was an eye opener to me. I always felt responsible for

breaking up the family. There was lots of resentment coming

from my mother. We were a heavy burden for her to carry.

I had grandparents, but they were very controlling. They would cut

you down, call you stupid, if you did not follow their direction.

They also played favorites, I was the only grandchild. The others

looked like Ralph, so they were ignored. I saw them reach out

for love, and got no response. My mom saw this, and cut

her parents out of her life. No contact, she was alone.

I receive lots of resentment from my family, because I, being a kid,

took the things offered by my grandparents instead of

refusing them, and standing up for my brother and sister.

No pressure there!! I was living under lots of condemnation.

Confusion too, grandpa was a minister. I didn't understand

how they could love the Lord, and treat people soo meanly.

Then one day mom meets this guy at work. His name was Bill.

He would come over, take us out. Play with us like a big brother.

He was cool!! Until the day he signed on the dotted line........

Mom could'nt handle us, we were wild. She turned discipline

over to him. That's when the reign of terror began.

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