Movie Quotes (N)

National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation

Clark Griswold (Chevy Chase): So, where'd you get the tenement on wheels?

Clark: Surprised? If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewed to the carpet I couldn't be more surprised.

Clark: Hey! If any of you are looking for any last minute gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people and I want him brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head, and I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is! Hallelujah!

Clark: Where do you think you're going? Nobody's leaving. Nobody's walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no! We're all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here! We're gonna press on, and we're gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny fucking Kaye! And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse!

*National Lampoon's Vacation

Clark Griswold (Chevy Chase): I distinctly ordered the antartic blue super sportswagon with the CB and the optional Rally fun pack.
Ed (Eugene Levy): You didn't order the uh, metallic pea?

Ed: Now, I owe it to myself to tell you, Mr. Griswold, that if you are thinking of taking the tribe cross country, this is the automobile you should be using. The Wagon Queen Family Truckster. You think you hate it now, but wait till you drive it.

Clark: 'Scuse me homes, what it is bro. I was wondering if you could tell me how to get back on the expressway?
Guy on the street: Fuck yo' momma. submitted by Sarah

Cousin Vicki: I'm going steady, and I French kiss.
Audrey Griswold: So? Everybody does that.
Cousin Vicki: Yeah, but Daddy says I'm the best at it.

Clark: Vicki, can I help you with that Kool-aid? Please?

Cousin Eddie (Randy Quaid): I don't know why they call this stuff hamburger helper. It does just fine by itself, huh? I like it better than tuna helper myself, don't you, Clark?
Clark Griswold: You're the gourmet around here, Ed.

Clark: Real tomato ketchup, Eddie?
Cousin Eddie: Oh, nothing but the best.

Rusty: Yeah, it's been a real drag, Dad. Maybe we can try it some other time. Wally World's overrated anyway.
Ellen: What do you think?
Clark: I think you're all fucked in the head. We're ten hours from the fucking fun park and you want to bail out. Well I tell you something this is no longer a vacation, it's a quest. It's a quest for fun. I'm gonna have fun and you're gonna have fun. We're all gonna have so much fucking fun we'll need plastic surgery to remove our god damn smiles. You'll be whistling Zippity-Doo-Dah out of your assholes!

Clark: I gotta be crazy, I'm on a pilgrimage to see a moose. Praise Marty Moose! Holy Shit!
Rusty: Dad, you want an aspirin or something?

Clark: We just drove two thousand four hundred and sixty miles just for a little Roy Wally entertainment. The moose says you're closed, I say you're open.
 
 

Natural, The

Roy Hobbs (Robert Redford): When I walk down the street, people will look at me and say,
there goes. . . the best there ever was.

Natural Born Killers

[Bleeding together over a river.]
Mickey: We'll be living in all the oceans now.

Mallory: You make every day feel like kindergarten.

Mickey: The whole world's comin' to an end, Mal!
Mallory: I see angels, Mickey. They're comin' down for us from heaven. And I see you
ridin' a big red horse...

[On a TV interview]
Boy 1: Mickey and Mallory are the best thing to happen to mass murder since Manson.
Boy 2: Yeah! But ... they're way cooler!

Mickey: I realized my true calling in life.
Wayne Gale: What's that?
Mickey: I'm a natural born killer.

Scagnetti: I was born and spent the first part of my life in Texas.
Warden: That's funny, you don't have the accent.
Scagnetti: I don't wanna talk like those assholes.
Warden: My mother was from Texas!
Scagnetti: I meant those other assholes.

The Net

Angela: Hmm... butch, beautiful, brilliant, Captain America meets Albert Schweitzer, spends all day dashing into the frey and making the world safe for democracy, at night playing Bach Cantas while curing cancer. submitted by Kristen

Angela: For future reference you should know that the living tend to interest me just a little
more than the dead do.

The Never Ending Story

Bastian: Why is it so dark?
Empress: In the beginning, it is always dark.

New Jack City

Nino Brown: Money talks, and bullshit runs a marathon. So, see ya and I wouldn't want to be ya.

*Nothing to Lose

Nick Beam (Tim Robbins): Where do I start? It's not you. Well actually it is you. Look, I'm just not... I'm not attracted to you anymore. I need space. You kinda... you kinda gross me out. In the beginning it was different. In the beginning you were better. But then I got to know you real well, and I came to realize that you're a fat idiot.

T-Paul (Martin Lawrence): I'm a student of human nature.
Nick Beam: You're a freak of human nature.

T: Not bad Nick, not bad - for a cheatin' bitch.
Nick: Hey! Look don't you call her that, you don't know her, don't call her that.
T: Okay, no disrespect, okay. What should I call her? "Monogamously challenged"?

Now and Then

Samantha: As we grow older, it becomes difficult to just believe. It's not that we don't want to, but too much has happened that we just can't.

Samantha: The tree house was supposed to bring us independence, but what the summer
brought us was independence from each other.

Crazy Pete: Things will happen in your life that you can't stop. But that's no reason to shut out the world.

*Nuts

Claudia Draper (Barbra Streisand): Sometimes people love you so much their love is like a god damn gun that keeps firing  straight into your head.

Claudia Draper: I still love you to the moon and down again and around the world and back again.
 

*quotes have been corrected and are in chronological order
 

Created by : Sara
Last Updated: 2-2-01
E-mail: KLAKSO@mn.rr.com