Lisa and Jade's News Page

 


Wednesday 3rd July 2002

Hey everyone. Ok so we've been slack really sorry bout that. Um I know the site still has a couple of glitches and that it hasn't been updated since the big overhaul but give us a break. Anyway it's Jade here. Just thought I'd write and tell you that everything is good. I've been rather busy with school, family and friends. My dog Tigerlily just turned 1 on the 24th June 2002.

You'll have to forgive Lisa for not participating as much as she'd like for she doesn't have access to a computer at the moment but hopefully that will change soon, in the mean time I'm afraid you are stuck with me and my pitiful offerings. However rest assured that Lisa is still around and still residing in Footscray (for how long is unsure at the moment) with Trip and Paddy.

Ok um there's not really much I wanna say right at the moment, I have about 3 weeks til I start my final semester of Uni, and we are being relocated to Werribee home of the zoo and the sewrage plant for our final term. um I am to turn 21 in two days which is going to be fun. Anyway I'm going to go, look around for some updates to the site soon, nothing major, and hopefully I will be able to clear up all the glitches before my next post. Take care.

PS this site is still under construction

 


Wednesday 9th January 2002

Happy New Year everyone.  Well it's Jade here.  Ok at the moment I am frantically working on a new look website (I know it's about fucking time but it's hard work).  I'm actually using a website program this time, namely Microsoft FrontPage which is a really good program if you are too lazy to do all the coding yourself.  Well what can I tell you, um I managed to pass second year of uni; TLC turned 6 months old on Christmas Eve, and we've spade her since (which she was none too happy about). 

Um Christmas was good, I think this was the first year there were no Cady arguments which in itself is a miracle.  I spent NYE with Matt and his friends down in Sorrento which was great, lets just say it included fireworks, witches hats and alcohol.

As for my holidays well they seem to be passing rather quickly.  I was planning on going fruit picking, however yet again it seems impossible considering I've been offered work experience with the Victorian Forensic Science Centre in their arson department.  Probably just as well I don't think I could spend a month or so away from my dog at the moment.

Well that's about it not very exciting I know but I don't really give a fuck.  Have a great year.

PS this site is still under construction


 

Sunday 2nd December

Well its Lisa here and I think its about time I added something here seeing as though its been about six months or so.... Yeah so now I live in Footscray (comprede comprede footisgray eh franco cozzo) people who don't live in Melbourne probably have no idea what that was all about. so I live there in an old house, one of only about 3 houses on the whole street, this street is just packed with old decrepit flats. but I love this house......its pretty big and its been sectioned off into 2 parts, me and Patrick have about 2/3 of the house and the rest is sectioned off into a sort of studio apartment with one main room and a kitchen and bathroom, another guy named Michael lives in that part. we have a huge veggie garden and a barn!!! in the middle of fucking Footscray and we have a massive barn in the backyard. as you can imagine all the Footscray junkies go back there but so far they've been harmless. even if they decided to break into the house and steal stuff because we have nothing of value anyway! except our guitars and our dog. touch them and you get killed!!
me and a group of people have got tickets to Meredith in a couple of weeks. its gonna rock...... the only part i didn't like was this is the first year you cant bring dogs!! trip is so sociable she would have loved it. stupid rules. so there's about 15 of us going up, i have to remember to bring the camera so i can put some new photos on this site... everything's getting a bit old , I think its time for a major revamp very soon.........

oh yeah and it was my birthday awhile okay it was nice and quiet just how I wanted it. Next years gonna be a big one and i just couldn't be fucked having a big party this year.

 


 

Friday 19th October

Hey everyone, how's it going? Ok well just wanted to come on to upload photo's of my puppy, Tigerlily Cady (TLC). Also to say that it's Lisa's b'day in 2 days YYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH and she's trying to ignore it so don't let her!!!! Only kidding Happy 20th birthday Lisey. ok just cause I wanna here's a picture of TLC

Ok well that's it so I'll check ya later

 


 

Friday 17th August

Wow shit loads have happened since my last posting, but I really can't be bothered writing much at the moment so I'm going to keep it brief. um Lisa and Paddy have now moved out of the other place and moved into a place in Footscray about 5-10 minutes walk from my Uni which is extremely convenient. As for me I'm still bumming around, I'm halfway through my undergrad course, and I'm about 3 minutes away from throwing in the towel and finding something else to do. But I'm not going to get into that. Um yeah what else has been happening, um I've been travelling quite a bit lately, went to Canberra to visit an old High school mate who joined ADFA this year and also went to Queensland to catch up with family which was cool, I'll post photos of my Aunt's place up here when I can it's huge like 50 acres or something, it's cool. Um apart from that it's been business as usual. Anyway I'm kinda busy at the moment so I'm going to go. Check out the other pages I've changed a couple of things here and there, see if you can find all the updates.

 


 

Tuesday 15 May 2001

I don't have much news but I just wanted to say thankyou to Jade for finally updating this page!! The only thing of interest I have done is moved out of home, I live with Patrick on the other side of the city and in 2 weeks we are going to be homeless as we are being kicked out of the place we live at the moment. Other news is me and Jade went to the Bob Dylan concert a few months ago and of course it was excellent.

And GOODBYE to Chloe, a beautiful dog with heaps of character who I have known about as long as I have known Jade (that's a long time) Your memory lives on!!!

 


 

Thursday 10th May 2001

Ok well I promised a friend I’d update something on the site so Matt this entry is for you (it’s a bit late sorry). Ok what have I been up to lately, well as boring as it may seem uni is taking up a lot of time, the rest is spent catching up with people I don’t get to see enough of.

Um ok so it’s been a while since I’ve (Jade) has written in here and for once I actually have some stuff to talk about although none of it is entirely thrilling.

Ok let me try to catch you up from the last time I posted a news update, um on January 8th 2001 my dog, Chloe, was put down. She was 14 and ½ and the ruler of the household. My holidays were spent doing sweet fuck all. Just taking it easy, and also I was sick for a bit of it. I have become a reformed drinker (since November) and have cut out all drugs from my life (except nicotine which I refuse to give up).

Ok so like I said a lot of my time is taken up by uni, I’m in my second year and actually I’m almost halfway through which is a bit daunting. My uni is the most disorganised uni in the world or at least Melbourne. In the holidays I had to travel into uni 5 times to try and finalise my enrolment, and even then I didn’t get it done til after uni came back. However it’s also the funniest uni ever. The bottom of our back parking lot is basically flooded 4-5 months a year so what does VUT decide to do, turn the top part of the back parking lot (the only part that isn’t flooded) into a swimming pool.

What else fun has happened at uni? Well my chem. Lab consists of getting syringes (without needles) and using them to have water fights. Although this Tuesday I was sitting in lab and we had a hot plate on and the cord of another thing got too close and basically started to sizzle and blow up and sent sparks everywhere, of course I was sitting right next to it, so sparks went flying on me, and all I could do was sit there and think “this can’t be good”. However disaster was diverted and life went on.

Ok what else have I got to tell you? Ah I’m planning a road trip with some old high school friends to go visit another friend up in Canberra who joined the army on a paid scholarship this year. That’s going to happen in a fortnight and I can’t wait it should be a blast, we are going to take my video camera along for the ride. Anyway I’ll tell you all about it when I return. Right now I can’t be bothered continuing so goodnight and Take care.

 


 

Tuesday 6th March 2001

Well summer is officially over and me and Jade didn't do a thing we planned on doing (redecorating her room, fixing up the boatshed etc.) Hehe we have been so lazy, an example of this is talking on the phone for 2 hours when we could have gone for a five minute walk and spoken face to face, but no we are too lazy. Jade won free tickets to go to this movie premiere and on the night we decided we couldn't be fucked going to that either. I think the only time we went out together was go to Southland once, we are pathetic!


Jade went back to uni today, discovered one of her lecturers is crazy heheh. I have done nothing of interest lately , apart from going to the big day out with Holly, Matt, Travis and Anthony, which was very cool. The only bands me and Holly saw were Placebo, Queens of the Stone Age, and Coldplay for about 5 minutes. We spent a lot of time in the rave tent, and most of the day talking to each other, (Holly: "See Lisa this just proves were best friends, were at the Big Day Out and we don't even give a fuck about the bands, we just want to talk to each other.") heheheh ahem, somebody must have slipped something in our drinks cost most of the day was spent madly dancing in our own "unique" ways, running for no apparent reason, and conversations such as "Holly I LOVE YOU you're my best friend!" "Lisa you're the closest person to me in the world. I would stand in front of a gun for you and you're brother!" "MATT you're the best brother in the world! Give Holly a hug!" etc etc. So yes we had heaps of fun, it took about 3 days and 500 cans of V to recover. Jade missed out on all the fun and I am going to kick her arse if she doesn't go next year!! Also Offshore has been moved to the showgrounds which is weird, but a few good bands are playing, Fatboy Slim, Everlast and BEN HARPER. Well that's it for now, hope you enjoy the "song" on the main page, and have a look at my puppy Trip (named cause I got her to take on a road trip with me) and Matts puppy Buzz (named after Buzz Lightyear) on the photos page. And yes I know they sound like druggo names but that wasn't intentional! (haha to follow the tradition, my friend got a puppy after we did and named him "Bud")

 

 


 

Saturday 6th January 2001

Wow do you realise that is the first time I've written 2001 cool. Ok well Lisa and I (Jade the one who does fuck all on this site) would like to wish you all a Happy New Year. Hope you guys had a blast. Well It's been ages since I've actually been to this page, and it's been ages since it's been updated etc I promise we'll have some new stuff for ya soon. As for news there really isn't much I can tell you, I haven't really been up to much. I'm just taking it easy before uni starts again in March. I was sick during Christmas and new years so I didn't get up to anything. None of us decided to venture to the falls this year, which felt weird but with Silverchair headlining do you blame us? granted Daniel is cool cause he's a vegan but that doesn't mean we have to like their music. Lets see what else oh anyone who comes here do us a favour and go to http://www.ninagordon.com , go to the message board under community and write a message saying you want her to come to Australia. Look I'm really sorry this is so boring but I really don't have anything interesting to say. All those people that have fuck all to do over summer go fruit picking. I'm gonna do it, and I think Lisey's going back this year too so come and join the fun and meet some weirdo's. Hmmm what else can I add? Don't forget to slip slop slap this summer, um drink lots of water, be kind to animals, and don't forget to sign our guest book. Well that's about all the useful information I have right now. Have a great summer and I promise both Lisey and I will work our arses off to get this site functional again. Take care.

 


 

Monday 18th December 2000

All I want to write is that me and Matt each got a puppy! They are really cute, Red Heeler x Kelpie, their names are Trip and Buzz and I'll have photos up soon.

 


 

Saturday 28th October 2000

Okay a bit of news, I (Lisa) got my license! Yay! After 3 years of having a learners permit. Also it was my birthday last week and of course we had a big party. Jade had the flu so she couldn't make it so that was pretty shit. I should have photos soon, I might not though cause someone dropped a roll of film in the kitchen sink and it was probably the roll of film we used at the party. Damn. Dave bought his turntables and held a rave in the backyard hehe... Danielle got really pissed and threw all these firecracker things in the fire and nearly killed everybody, um what else happened.... I cant think of anything right now but anyway it was a good party and nothing got stolen this year unlike my 18th party last year where heaps of stuff got stolen, and it was a weird collection of stuff too, ( my brothers electric shaver, a fire extinguisher, a violent femmes cd, a guitar tuner, a huge cane chair - don't ask me how the fuck this got taken without anyone noticing but it did. Doesn't really matter seeing as though I stole the chair too when I was drunk ).

Oh and a bit of sad news, I have to go get my dog Sandy put down tomorrow because she can no longer walk or hear and is going blind... so we have to do the put her out of her misery thing. She's gonna have to have one last beer before we take her to the vets, she has this habit of knocking peoples beer over and drinking it. Poor dog, she's inbred, retarded, a lesbian (seriously, she is) and she once ate my brothers drug stash and drank a whole cask of wine, she's been crazy ever since. Various things she has eaten over the years include a shoe, she didn't just chew it, she ate and digested it, a battery, whole tissue boxes, a bike tyre, a dead cat, snail bait which nearly killed her, a wasp, and heaps of other shit. Anyway we'll all be sad to see her go as she is defiantly an unforgettable dog. That's about it for now.

 

 


 

Saturday 2nd September 2000

I don't have much to say but this page has been neglected for too long and I (Lisa) feel guilty. Ummm... what can I write...
Holly has a new kitten called Mavis. I've got a new guitar, acoustic Gibson Epiphone. I'll take pictures when I get it, its still in the shop. Jades still going to school, she also has a new guitar but I'll get HER TO WRITE ABOUT IT cause its about time she did something around here heheh.

 

 

 


 

Thursday 11th May 2000

Well not much has been happening but I feel like writing in here for some reason. I've been really boring lately, doing boring shit like looking for a job, practising driving so I can finally get my license, and babysitting a lot. I've hardly even gone out anywhere cause I've just got no money, and I haven't seen my friends in awhile and I MISS THEM. I'm going to plan a day with me, Jade, Holly, George and hopefully Fiona so I can catch up with everyone and take some photos. I was putting a photo page on this site today and I realised most of the photos are really old, I need some new ones.

In other news, the new Veruca Salt album is coming out soon and I cant wait to get it. I've heard some songs off it on the internet and I love them.

The car is coming along, we're painting the undercoat this weekend, and if I get fifty bucks were going to paint my car purple, so that everyone knows it is mine.

Well that's about all the news I've got... everyone email Jade and ask her to write some stuff on here cause she's probably got a lot more news than I do.

 

 


 

Thursday 6th April 2000

Well I (Lisa) can't believe we haven't updated this page since December - LAZY!! Sooo many things have happened since then I can't even remember them all, so I wont write about all of it right now. Okay at the moment Jade, Holly and Georgina are all going to school type thingies, Georgie is doing Art at TAFE, Holly art at a year 13 type class, and Jade is doing some complicated science thing (I can never remember what its called, sorry Jade) at University. But I'll let her give you all the details. As for me, I'm not going to school in any form because I've had enough of it for awhile. I'm saving up money doing babysitting and stuff, (Would you believe market research paid me $20 to taste a white Tim Tam? Easiest twenty bucks I've ever made.)

I went away fruit picking with Paddy for about a month and had one of the best times of my life, met heaps of really nice people, had parties on the Murray, I cant believe how NICE people can be, compared to the bitchiness you put up with in High School. The money wasn't too bad either, but when payday came around we never ended up getting much, cause we had to pay for board and food for 2 of us, and we got heaps of subs. At first it was a bit annoying doing all the work and not getting much for it, but by the end of it we were staying more for the cool atmosphere and the people we made friends with than for the money. Of course as soon as we got really good at the work and would have made quite a bit every day, the season ended.

But anyway I'm back in good old Chelsea now and doing anything I can to get the fuck out of it. I'm helping Paddy and Terry fix up the car, I'm not sure when it will be ready, although we have heaps of time to work on it, we don't have money to buy the stuff we need for it. Anyway I have to stop writing now and get some sleep, but I promise we will have our New years Eve stories up here soon.

 

 


 

Thursday 16th December

Sorry we still haven't done one of our too long in depth every little detail included entries, I have no excuse except I am lazy. I will start to do it here but who knows when I'll finish it. Okay, the tea party concert. This concert was AMAZING. There were so many different types of people there, that in itself was fun to watch. We were pretty far up the back but we still had an excellent view. Jeff M. was pretty talkative, telling the crowd about acid trips and why he hates religion, he pretty much got the crowd into a frenzy. It was such a good concert, I cant wait to see them again at the Falls Festival.

High School. We've finished!! We've got our results back and were both happy with them, and that's all I ever want to say again about my disgusting 6 years of that place, uggh. Now we'll just try and put it in the past hehe.

Ben Lee Concert. I cant write about this cause I didn't go.

My 18th. Me ( Lisa ) and Holly had a joint 18th at my house. It was a reallly good party, about 143282340921342332434 people crashed it ( my mum made the crashers do all the cooking, haha ) Holly and Jade like a new guy called Ben, Danielle seduced him ( "I want you to come home and fuck me" EEEEWW) We had two tent things out the back and it was funny cause all the straight people were under one (it was pouring rain) and all the bong heads were under another (guess which one we were under), all the ravers were in Matts room raving and all the guitar people were in the lounge room playing guitars and drums and shit. Anyway we got heaps of photos thanks to Mark, otherwise we wouldn't have had any, I took one while I was pissed and its all blurry. You can look at them here.

Everyone I talk to will already know about Patrick (otherwise known as Paddy or Pat or Uncle Puddles - dont ask) we've been together for 5 months now so it is so slack of me to not have mentioned him on this page yet, if you wanna know what he looks like heres a photo of him with his nephew Harley, his hair is shorter now. Ok I'm out of time I'll write more later .

 

 


 

Friday 19th November

Wow so much has happened since there was a serious post first of all the big news WE HAVE FINISHED HIGHSCHOOL!!!!!!! It's still really hard to believe but it's over!!! Ok it's too long to report everything so I'm going to summarise totally. Ok since July we've attended the tea party concert (amazing experience) seen Ben lee live (one of the best performances I've ever been to really blew me away, LISA TURNED 18!!!!! ( great party I'll do it in detail eventually), um Paddy (Lisa will explain when she gets off her arse and writes on this page *s*), we got tickets to the falls!!!!!, um I can't think so much has happened it's hard to fit months of stuff into a paragraph.

 


 

Thursday 4th November 1999

I just realised that we haven't written anything here for four months so I think I better update it. But Im too busy right now Ill do it tonight. hehe

 


 

Monday 12th July 1999

well today school started again. Yeah. (If anyone can't tell that was a heavily sarcastic remark I just made). Anyway oh yeah I was just writing here the inform people the new Magic Dirt at Rowville pictures are finally up. So please check that out you can find it but going to the main page and then clicking on music and then clicking on magic dirt. I know sounds confusing but it really isn't. Anyway we just started our third account with Geocities. See what we do for you peoples, we've already used up the space given to use for two accounts but does that stop us no, we just get another new account. Of course no one will notice it because we have intertwined it into the other accounts. Ok I know that sounded way confusing hell I confused myself, but never mind. Anyway no other real news. Oh yeah hold on I just up loaded quite a few Gillian Anderson pictures taken by yours truly, except they aren't on any page yet that will be the next thing, so stay tuned. Or what ever. *s* Anyway best be off have a good one and yeah later.

 


Friday 2nd July 1999

Ok well today we got TEA PARTY tickets!!!!! Yeah!!! What else? Oh yeah anyone noticed the improvement to this site I fucking hope so cause I have been working my butt off on it!!! There are also new additions, and stuff like the Ewan McGregor page and the Magic dirt page, etc we still have heaps more to go though so stay tuned!!! Yeah well still on holidays, that sounds like I mean it in a bad way believe me I DON'T!!!!!!! Anyway take time to cruise around this sight cause it's new and improved. YEAH TEA PARTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyone who has the opportunity come please cause it's gonna be cool!!!!! It's also close to the end of school, one more thing to celebrate!!! Later peoples.

 


Wednesday 30th June 1999

Well I (Lisa) FINALLY fixed my computer so I can now contribute to this page again, aren't you all so excited. Okay latest news.. umm we are on holidays. Hmm we haven't really done much. Ok first I have to say that its 3:53am so this might not be the best entry, sorry. Okay we saw Magic Dirt for the second time in two weeks and it was cool, as usual. They definitely DO NOT know T. Schinagl (LIAR he is). SO much for all his stories about doing drug deals to them and getting invited onstage and going to their houses and being on first name basis with them etc etc!! Umm we got busted smoking in the toilets with this other girl and it was so fucking funny, the security guard was just like a teacher screaming at us and we couldn't stop laughing. Anyway luckily we didn't get thrown out like she threatened we would and the concert went off but I think I've said that already.

What else...oh Jade's birthday is in a week, she's gonna be 18 and she ISN'T having a party!!! JADE YOU ARE AN IDIOT! Everyone email her and tell her she is an idiot. What else...oh Trav's band has been playing at Goo, so go see them if you get a chance. I think thats all the news so far. How boring...oh jade got heaps of Magic Dirt pics so hopefully I'll fix my scanner soon and get them scanned cos there's some really cool ones. Oh we want to see Placebo but we cant stand silverchair. ( No offence to people who love them, ahem, Julia... Daniel is ok I always approve of vegans hehe but ugh.. their music..) So what are we supposed to do? What a dilemma.

 


Monday 26th April 1999

Ok well I have been kinda neglecting this page a bit but it's not like anyone reads it anyway. You know what I was wondering what is it about girls that make them have to write everything down? Why don't guys have the same inclination? I mean you never see a guy with a journal you never see a guy's web page with descriptions of what he's been up to you know or if you do it's yeah man I went to the footy to see blah blah they were awesome. But girls well a lot of girls anyway seem to need to keep a record of our lives and it's not like our live's are really exciting or anything, like I don't keep a diary but I keep this which in a way is a journal for everyone to read. Ok I'll shut up about this now it's just weird you know.

Ok by the way I don't know if this is already announced on our page but you know Travis, well he has joined a band named K-Division which is a pretty well known band down here. So yeah.

Ok well the major thing I have to talk about is Offshore this happened from Friday the 2nd of April to Monday the 5th of April and man was it cool (the little I remember it). Anyway the day before was the end of the first half of semester 1 and that night I slept over at Lisey's only I seriously couldn't sleep so at like 3 am I got up scanned a picture the Offshore ticket, then went outside and looked at the sky for a couple of hours, and man it was so surreal (word of the month) it was amazing I have never heard Chelsea so quiet, it was cool, the sky was really clear and I watched the sunrise which was interesting believe it or not, then around 5:30/6 I went back to bed and fall asleep. I was told we were leaving at about 5:30 but it turned out to be around 7 before we left. Anyway the ride up was uneventful, we stopped off for the normal hangover breakfast of hash browns. Ok If I keep going at this detail it will take me a week so now I will just skim.

We got the and we saw these yobo guys playing football, one with a jim's car wash tee on who was cute anyway while we were there security came down and yelled at them, then the car in front of us some of the people got out and hid something in the bonnet of their car (which the car searchers were checking anyway). So we got to the car searchers and this guy said to this girl, "we shouldn't even bother checking this car", which I found amusing considering we had quite a few substances that weren't allowed hidden. But the girl said ‘we better you never know". Anyway they didn't find the plants or the alcohol but they did confiscate our hammer, (we don't understand either). Yeah oh and Holly had the bong pipe in her pocket or something and they didn't see that either *s*. Oh tip for any festivals that involve searching, always go to a person of the opposite sex they are a lot kinder and less knowledgeable. Anyway we got through, and we were finding a place and there were fence posts with tape on them and we decided to park on the other side of them. Of course they turn out to be fire barriers and we got asked 4 different times to move but our smooth talking and innocent looks got us through yet another situation (others weren't as lucky). And of Course who should be our neighbours but the yobo's. That was fun.

In a break of traditions we decided not to get bent before putting up tents, but as soon as that was done (which without a fucking hammer was a fucking hard job) we got straight into the festive mood. While kicking back enjoying a joint the yobos start playing footy don't they. So as they kept falling on our badly constructed tents we are thinking of ways to sabotage their stuff, we agreed on letting their car tyres down, however then we met Yobo Mark who turned out to be a very nice (and cute) guy, so we ditched our plans and decided to befriend the yobos (another grand plan in festival living). Yobo Mark who's catch phrase was "bloody oath", was also anti smoking and decided to chuck our smokes out the window after which Yobo two the lifesaver chucked Lisey's Zippo. Anyway that day we just sat in our van and smoked and we went through no joke $150 worth of mull that day. So you can imagine how fucked we were and it was that day that we came up with the idea well Lisa came up with it and I understood it straight away and we spent the rest of Offshore trying to explain it to Holly and Kathy. Anyway Lisey came up with the notion of Pre-swallow. It's a technique stoners use when they are eating. Anyway there were these bus people next to us and they were really hot and we were watching them all day, and that night one thing lead to another and they came over and I was so gone by that stage that I can hardly remember I can remember this girl had this glowing thing on her head and I was sure her head was bleeding. Even though the thing was like fluorescent blue and yellow and green as well as red. Anyway I woke up after passing out and everyone had gone so I went for a walk down to the bands. This was like 10 at night and it was my first experience of the band area *S* anyway the rest is a huge blur somewhere along the way I picked up a whole heap of guys three of which called me after the festival, and I can remember going back stage for a while, don't ask me how I got there, but that's about it. The second day we had run out of Mull except Lisa's angel of a brother gave us more. And somewhere in that day we lost the cone of our bong so we asked our cute stoner neighbours if they had "the thing that you put mull in" and that became their joke for the rest of the day, and they said ‘cone' and I went yeah that thing and they gave us one and then we couldn't think of anything to cut the mull up in so we asked them if they had anything and they gave us a cup. And they also made us a cone which didn't fit but it was a nice thought.

Sorry if you don't understand this it's probably because this happened so long ago that I've forgotten a lot and what I remember I can't remember in order of time so I'm just chucking it anywhere. Anyway um yeah during one of our stoned sessions we were listening to Babes in Toyland and there's a song on the nemesisters album which I recommend you get I don't know the name but when we were listening to it it made people who walked by walk to the music, like if the music was slow the people would walk slow and when it quickened so did the people, don't ask it made sense at the time. Jesus Christ this is long. Anyway oh and our stoned neighbours kept saying I'm Mr. bong, I'm going to get you sttttoooonnneeeeddddd. Oh and another neighbour who was a crack addict or something looked like a rapist and they scared us so we avoided them the whole night. What else um yeah the pattern was drink get stoned pass out pick up guys etc.

On the last night I can actually sort of remember this night *s* um Kathy and I went off to get drinks, and they had this two drink at a time rule and seeing as though we needed to get eight drinks it took ages anyway while I was waiting for Kathy I met this really cute guy and started talking and he was a painter and anyway he hooked up with us and helped carry the drinks back to where we said we'd met holly and Lisa but they weren't there and so me and this guy who I can remember had a middle name of John, said we'd go look and anyway we started but then I went back to his tent and we were doing bongs together and stuff and anyway I was feeeling weird there was definitely something else in that bong, and so I left him there and practically crawled back to Kathy and then we listened to Ben Harper and Jon Spencer and went back to the car where Holly and Lisa were and we all decided to take a power nap and we woke up the next morning which really shitted me but oh well and that's it. Sorry there's way more but it would take too long to tell. PS if anyone has their own offshore story to tell they can send it to us or something. Anyway have a great time and sorry it took so long for me to get this to ya. Not that anyone reads it anyway.

 


28th May 99

Okay since Offshore was about two months ago I suppose I should write about it finally, sorry its so late and it probably won't make much sense cos we were wasted for the whole time we were there.

Okay on the night before we left, I think it was a Thursday but I could be wrong, Holly and Jade came over and we tried to get an early night but of course stayed up talking all night and were like zombies the next day when we had to get up at 6am. It took us about an hour to get in the car, but we left and drove for about 2-3 hours. We got there, they took our hammer off us and were left wondering how the fuck we were meant to put our tents up, considering the ground was like a rock. We borrowed one of out friendly (and cute) neighbours and got all the tents up, and checked out our neighbours.

The ones to the right of us were four guys, about 23 or so, all HOT and very very nice. We sat in the car for hours just looking at them , it was cool. The ones to the left were crack heads, and a bit farther down was a bus full of hot guys who we named, Ben Harper (cos he looked like Ben Harper) The Gypsy, The Surfie, and The Blonde One. In front of us was a group who we named "the yobbo's" cos they played footy and drank beer and were loud. At first they annoyed us but we got used to them and ended up being friends with them. One of them came up to us and introduced himself, when he noticed we smoked he lectured us for about four hours and there my precious Zippo lighter out the window. (don't worry, I saved it)

We went and saw some bands, I cant remember who though heheh. We got really drunk and walked around and made a lot of new friends. We met this guy named Steve who told us he was from the CIA and we actually believed him. I thought Dave was my brother for some reason, and went around saying "this is my brother Dave". We went over to the bus and ended up hanging around them. Me and Holly fell over some people and ended up waking up in their car the next morning. I had no idea where the fuck I was. Oh also it turns out Fiona knows them. How fucking FREAKY is that.

I felt shit the next day so I stayed in the car and decided not to get drunk that night. We found Matt and he gave us a ten hour lecture on how bad drugs are and then gave us some, in typical Matt fashion. So then I ended up talking to everyone and anyone, including the toilet cleaner person and people from my school that I don't even like. I lost Holly and Jade so I walked around with Matt W. all night who complained about how much his life sucks, as he usually does. I found this guy standing all by himself in the middle of this field with mist all around him, it was the trippiest thing I've ever seen. I tried to get him to run around with me but he was on acid and couldn't stop laughing and saying "you're not even close" whatever that's supposed to mean. About a week ago I saw him in a restaurant in Fitzroy, how weird is that. He had on a black cape and was rocking back and forth in the corner heheh. Anyway I eventually found H&J again, they told me that they had found a guitar in a tepee. "Hey lisa, we found a guitar! Its in a tepee!" I thought they were joking but they were serious, they tried to bring me there but we got sidetracked by something and didn't end up going there. I cant remember much about that second night so Ill add more later when I remember.

The next day we stayed in the van all day. I Know how boring that sounds but it wasn't. We just sat there and talked to the people walking past and listened to music and smoked, it was really relaxing & cool. An embarrassing encounter with our neighbours when we were bent

us "excuse me do you have one of those things that you put in the bong that holds mull?"
them "a cone?"
us "YES!!!! a CONE!!! THAT'S what its called!!!"
then later we heard them imitating us in a girly voice and laughing like maniacs, "yes, a cone! thats what its called!" we nearly died but it was hilarious at the same time. Then when one of them gave us a cup I said "oh he's so nice!" and I didn't realise they heard me, we later heard them imitating me in a girls voice and laughing, it was soo funny but I guess you had to be there. When they got stoned (like every five minutes) they'd put on this really deep voice and go "hellllooo...I am Mister Bong. I am going to get you STOOONNNEEEEEDDD" and then they'd laugh for about 25 minutes straight. They did this for about three hours straight one day and we laughed every time they did it which was about 100 times. Another embarrassing encounter, one of them (who we named 'the artist' cos we could never remember his name) took his shirt off and I go "look he just took off his shirt!!! He is SO hot!" and then I realised they all heard me and were laughing, I was like "SHIT". Anyway they were cool neighbours and I hope we run into them again.

Our other neighbours, "the yobbos" were funny as well. One of them who we named "the gay one" (not to be mean or anything, he really was gay and we couldn't remember his name) came running up to us and shoved this flag onto me and told me to mind it, then he never asked for it back and at the time I thought I was so lucky and it was such a great thing to own heheh. They'd come up to our car and scab food and stuff, and the one who was yelling at us for smoking came up and scabbed cigarettes when his other friend wasn't looking. They'd lecture us soo much like "Ok every puff is killing you. Go on, take a drag, now you're one minute closer to death" heheh. They were cool guys they invited us to their footy club but of course we'll never end up going to it.

That night we went and saw Ben Harper, Jon Spencer Blues Explosion and some other bands that I cant remember right now. Me and Holly were tripping when Jon Spencer was on, and I have to say it was really scary, all those weird sound effects and shit we were so scared we couldn't move off the grass.

Holly had a really funny incriminating hallucination but we promised we'd never tell anyone hehehheh. We were so high and the music was really trippy and scaring the shit out of us. jade disappeared somewhere and ended up with some guy, I cant remember what me and Holly did after that but I know I fell in a hole at one stage and so did Holly heheh.

Anyway the next day we woke up early and packed up and left before the rush. I was sick for about two weeks after that but I don't care, it was all worth it hehe. I'll write more as I remember it.