South Park Theme Song

I'm goin' down to South Park, gonna have myself a time,
(Stan, Kyle) Friendly faces everywhere, humble folks without temptation.
Goin' down to South Park, gonna leave my woes behind,
(Cartman) Ample parking day or night people shouting HOWDY NEIGHBOUR!!
Headin' up onto South Park, gonna see if I can't unwind.
(Kenny mumbles)
So come on down to South Park and meet some friends of mine.

Kyle's mum's a stupid bitch in D minor

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeellll, Kyle's mum's a bitch
She's a big fat bitch
She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world
She's a stupid bitch
If there ever was a bitch
she's a bitch to all the boys and girls.

On Monday she's a bitch
On Tuesday she's a bitch
On Wednesday through Saturday she's a bitch
Then on Sunday just to be different
She's a super King Kamehamaha bee-atch.

Have you ever met my friend Kyle's mum?
She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world
She's a mean old bitch and she has stupid hair
She's a bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch
Bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch yes she's a stupid bitch
Kyle's mum's a bitch and she's just a dirty bitch.

KYLE'S MUM IS A BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEETCH-AA!

Mr. Hankey's Song

Santa Claus is on his way
Loaded good is on his sleigh
Drop them off on Christmas Day
And I'll say HI-DEE-HO!

Folks will gather 'round the fire
Sing a song, start a choir
Pretty soon they'll all retire
And I'll say HI-DEE-HO!

I hope that Santa comes real soon
I've been waiting since fir...

Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo

Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo
He loves me and I love you
Therefore, vicariously, he loves you
Even if you're a Jew

Sometimes he's nutty
Sometimes he's corny
He can be brown or greenish brown
So eat your fiber on Christmas Eve & he might come to your town

I'm a Lonely Jew

Its hard to be a Jew on Christmas
My friends won't let me join in any games
And I can't sing Christmas songs
Or decorate a Christmas tree
Or leave water out for Rudolph
Cause there's something wrong with me.
My people don't beleive in Jesus Christ divinity

I'm a jew.
A loney Jew.
On Christmas.

Hanuka is nice, but why is it,
That Santa passes over my house every year
And instead of eating Ham
I have to eat kosher Latkas
Instead of silent night
I'm singing, "Hoo Hach Do Gaveev"
And what the [beep] is up with lighting all these [beep]ing candles
tell me please.

I'm a Jew, a lonely Jew
I'd be merry, but I'm Hebrew
On Christmas.