Jokes and Fun Facts
I decided to add a Buffy Jokes and Fun Facts page. Here you can find such things as Way to Tell Angel Buffy is dead and Glory's audtion scene.
Top Ten Ways to Tell Angel Buffy's Dead
10. Angel...You know how so many people wished that Buffy was dead? Well someone's came true!
9. You've been sucked into a big shiny hole before...What's it like? Think a slayer would survive?
8. "Angel...Sorry, man, we, uh, totalled your car....PSYCHE! It ain't all that bad, Buffy's just dead!!!"
7. Angel...Death was Buffy's gift...Happy Birthday.
6. Angel...You know that saying "Live hard, Die young?" Well change Live to Land and that's about what happened to Buffy.
5. Hey ya, Angel? Got a box about 5 foot 2 and toothpick wide? Yeah, we're looking for a box to bury Buffy in...
4. Angel...A slayer has died. Oh! Calm down! It's not Faith, it's Buffy!
3. Angel, honey, maybe you'd better sit down...okay, stand, fine whatever...Remember when you accidentally got your humanity back, and then spent that really awesome day with Buffy, making love and eating like a pig and going out for a tan, and all that? Well, remember how you gave it all up and had the PTB turn back time because as a human you couldn't protect Buffy and she could die, and all that? Yeah, well...Dumb*ss! She killed herself! You threw
it all away for nothing! Plech...blondes.
2. Angel. I went to Sunnydale, and got you this cool T-Shirt. But Spike stole it, so I got you this cool bumper sticker instead. It says: "Life is short, Slay hard." I wonder who they were talking about?
1. Angel, I'm sorry. I have some very excit--I mean, depressing news. Well, it seems that your ex-lover, the blonde one with--no, no, not the undead one. The dead, *er* the one with the stake-a-tude attitude and the bad relationship sense...yeah. Her. Buffy. Yeah, well....she had this little problem see, and she kind of fell see, to her death...no, not fell actually...more like jumped...no! No, now come on, guy! Don't cry, it's not all that bad...after all, she saved the world...a lot.
ANOTHER Top Ten Ways to Tell Angel Buffy's Dead
10. How does Faith feel about being the only slayer left?
9. Sometimes people that we love die and sometimes they sacrifice themselves to save their little sister named Dawn and humanity... and sometimes they hang out with the wrong crowd, but let's go back to having a little sister named Dawn and saving humanity for a second.
8. You know that blonde you used to have a thing for, um, she kinda... sorta... kicked the bucket.
7. Let's play charades for a sec...
6. Time is a funny thing when you think about it in a non-literal sense. So, let's think literally and logically here. If a slayer has to chose between sacrificing her made up sister or herself, who would she choose? Because I have bet going and so you need to answer.
5. There comes a point in time where you have to face the music and well, Buffy faced her music. I'm pretty sure it was some type of death theme song music, but music it was and she did face it.
4. In all seriousness, Buffy bit the dust. Well, maybe not dust, more like a long painful absorbency into hell... wait, that's not really helping out the situation is it?
3. Angel, guess who died? Come on and guess already!
2. If you have let's say eight puppies and the strongest and most bravest puppy, we'll call her Muffy, dies... how many puppies are left?
1. Angel, Buffy's dead.
here's an interesting thing that I got off the AOL message boards....Thanks Bing! You know Glory was originaly Cherry?
Glory (aka Cherry) Audition Scene
INT. CHERRY'S LAIR - NIGHT
Cherry paces as a minion looks on.
CHERRY: I want some ice cream. Everyone likes it. They scream for it, traditionally. We never had it in Hell.
MINION :You don't eat.
CHERRY: That sounds like an issue between me
and the ice cream, doesn't it? Not really your concern.
MINION: I'll go now.
CHERRY: No. The moment has passed. Don't want it anymore. Try to give me ice cream and I'll rip your ears off. Walk with me.
She grabs the minion's hand, forces him to pace with her.
CHERRY: I like you. You're not like the others.
(looks closer)
Or maybe you are. Are you human?
MINION: Yes.
CHERRY: Are you dead?
MINION: Um... no.
CHERRY: Oh. Right. Your kind. Kill ‘em and they stay dead. Thought they were all just lying there real still, ‘til the smell started.
MINION You're hurting my hand.
CHERRY You have pain. Nothing wrong with
that either. Nothing the hell wrong with that!
MINION: Your brother said not to hurt me.
She leans in over him, conspiratorially.
CHERRY: My brother is weak. He doesn't
approve of me anymore. He doesn't like the taste in my mouth.
Cherry laughs.
MINION Can I go now?
CHERRY: No. How's your hand? Poor wittle
ouchy hand. Still painful? Tell me
about the pain. Is it sharp and hot?
Tell me!
MINION: I really want to go.
CHERRY: (reasonable) I understand that.
She breaks his neck. He falls to the ground, dead.
CHERRY: Great. Now I want ice cream again. (to dead body) Get up!
END OF SCENE
Ya definatly think I like Glory better than Cherry...but the scene is pretty funny itself.
One more thing I want to do and it's also a post from the AOL message boards...from Meltha she actualy took the time to go frame by frame of the finale "previously on" and got all of them. Heres the list. She got most of them she wasn't sure on a few but hey gotta give her credit.
Yup, somebody had to do it. Here's a breakdown of all the clips in that opening montage. If you want, try to figure out the name of each episode:
*Giles on "one in a generation"
*"Buffy" "Xander" "Cordelia" "It's Willow, right?" "Mr. Giles" "Angel"
* Vampyre book
*Amy with an ax
*Xander's insect chick
*the Annointed One
*Hyena boy
*Angel/Buffy first kiss (vamp out, scream)
*evil puppet
*evil clown (sorry guys!)
*Buffy hits Giles
*Master killing Buffy, Buffy in water, Master shooting white light
*too blurry
*Buffy wakes up
*Buffy with cross necklace
*Buffy kills Master
*Buffy breaks Master's bones
*zombie-looking guy (?)
*Welcome to Sunnydale run over
*First sight of Spike, vamped and smoking
*Incan mummy girl
*swim team possessed
*Ethan and Janus mask
*Angel vamped out
*Spike twirling Dru
*Kendra killing worm guy
*John Ritter as Ted
*Big, evil eye thing (?)
*Angel loses his soul
*Buffy using rocket launcher on Judge
*Willow walk in a closet and finds Xander and Cordelia
*Oz kissing Willow
*Amy casting Xander's love spell
*Angelus killing Jenny
*Giles in shock
*dang ugly thin with no eyes and massive lower fangs (?)
*somebody being attacked (don't know who)
*Angelus's immolation-o-gram
*Angelus opening Acathla
*Willow performing soul restoration
*Buffy sending Angel to hell
*Cordy/Xander kiss on season three opening
*Willow dusts a vamp
*Mr. Trick (?)
*Angel returns from hell
*A big eye (?)
*Willow/Xander clothes fluke kiss
*Giles kissing Joyce
*Light shooting from someone's eyes (?)
*Spike catching fire in Angel's garden (Lover's Walk)
*unknown female demon
* Buffy and Angel in the snow from Amends
*Collection of fireflies (?)
*Xander's blue car (his thing) from The Zeppo
*Buffy dreaming
*Faith and Giles
*Cordy and Wesley
*VampWillow
*demon who faked stealing Angel's soul
*Xander eating something
*prom hounds
*Faith pushed off a building
*Angel biting Buffy
*Mayor Snake
*High school blown up
*Angel about to leave for LA
*Buffy's first day of college
*Initiative commando
*Melting face (?)
*Buffy lying down
*Green eyed demon (?)
*Xander's popcan explodes over Anya
*Harmony vamped
*Oz transforming in Fear Itself
*Evil FI flesh-rotted skeleton
*Anya in bunny suit (FI, again)
*FI bats swooping over Scoobies
*Tarantula on Willow's shoulder in Joan of Arc costume (FI!)
*Fiesta hat Giles (um, FI, possibly somebody's favorite?)
*blurry Giles
*Oz kissing Veruca
*Ozwolf
*Spike tazered by the Initiative
*Riley
*Spike's failed attempt to bit Willow
*Buffy stake a vamp (bout time they showed that!)
*D'Hoffryn and Willow
*Dracula dissolves into bats (out of order)
*Riley with a gun
*Willow and Tara moving pop machine in Hush
*Gentleman
*big, icky green demon (?)
*314 door
*Adam
*Spike double thumbs up
*Adam close shot
*Buffy standing in light next to an open grave (?!??!?)
*Faith wakes up
*Faith as Buffy
*Buffy in blue looking horrified
*Buffy holding hands with someone, hands glowing
*Xander holding an exploding book
*Tree limbs taking over the dorm in Where the Wild Things Are
*Flaming fireplace
*too blurry
*Oz and Willow (when he returned)
*Oz tortured by the Initiative
*Blowing up the Initiative
*Forrest as Adam clone
*Willow, Giles, and Xander incantating during Initiative blow up
*Buffy beating Adam (doves, removal of power core)
*First Slayer attacks
*Willow and Tara in the ice cream truck
*Cheeseman!
*Arrival of Dawn
*Harmony's note "Slayer, Come out and Die" with smiley face dot over i
*Dawn hearing insane guy say she doesn't belong
*Joyce about to collapse ("Who are you?")
*the demon with the stick that made Xander split in two
*Spike's failed attempted chipectomy
*Buffy performs the "pull back the curtain spell"
*Dawn looking ticked off
*Glory
*Willow and Tara
*Spike waking up after his Buffy dream
*Glory's big, fake snake
*Joyce wheeled into surgery
*demon (generic, I think)
*Riley looking unhappy
*helicopter taking Riley away
*Buffy missing helicopter
*blurry image
*vamp fight (apparently the ones who bit Riley, but out of order?)
*Ben morphs into Glory
*Troll begins to appear
*Glory primping and a minion
*Troll finishes appearing
*Willow zaps Glory into the sky
*Spike telling off Buffy when Dawn finds out she's the key
*Dawn upset ("is this blood?")
* April swingin' a park bench
*Buffy hugs puffy Xander
*Joyce's body on couch
*Buffy finds Joyce
*Willow and Tara kiss
*First Slayer as guide ("death is your gift")
*Buffybot destroyed
*Glory mindsucks Tara
*Ticked-off, floating Willow
*Glory zapped by Willow's lightning bolts
*Dorm wall pulled off by Glory
*Shot of Willow, Tara, Buffy, and Dawn in dorm room
*Buffy carrying Dawn
*Glory hit by the truck
*Winnebago
*Buffy protecting Dawn
*Knights on horseback
*Winnie roll-over
*Glory breaking down Willow's protective barrier to kidnap Dawn
END