I'VE LOVED YOU FOREVER

Chapter 1

I have been planning this trip for months now. I was heading to New Orleans to see the Backstreet Boys in concert again. They had just been there this past November and were now returning for another show. I picked up my friend Ronda and Ashley and we set out for the two hour drive to New Orleans. Our last trip there had been very nice. Ronda met Kevin and they went out and partied all night. Ashley met up with Brian and Howie, and Nick and I ended up in the hotel room. I can't really explain how I feel for Nick. I just don't know if he'll remember me. He called a few times but I was at work and he never left a phone number for me to return his call. I even bought one of those caller ID things, but he had a blocked number. It was magical that last time. I had brought my daughter and my Mom with me and Ronda and Ash came too. My daughter and I were chosen for the mother daughter duo for the perfect fan. I was in tears as I was matched up with Nick. Nick held my hand and sang to me. I can't believe I didn't pass out! My daughter was afraid to hold Nick's hand so Nick held my hand and I held my daughter's hand. We walked around the stage. Afterwards Nick gave my daughter a stuffed animal and he winked at me. I thought oh Lord, you can take me now! Little did I know what would happen. Ronda and Ashley had taken 4 rolls of film just of me Nick and my daughter. Nick walked us down the steps and then he disappeared under the stage. I was all a glow for the rest of the concert. I couldn't believe how lucky I was. Whenever Nick was on our side of the stage I would just cry. He'd wave to me and do extra thrusts. Damn that boy knew how to make me crazy. By the end of the night I was pretty exhausted. We went back to the hotel and I sent my daughter up to her room with my Mom. I had a separate room so that I could stay out late and sleep in without being woken up too early. Ronda and Ashley shared a room. We all met up at the bar to have a drink and talk about the concert. The next thing I know there is this big commotion going on downstairs and we went to see what it was. I about died when I saw Kevin and Brian coming up the escalator. I looked at my friends and said, They're staying in this hotel? I really needed a drink now. I headed back over to the bar and finished my drink. Ronda and Ashley had disappeard to find the boys and I stayed at the bar. I was talking to the bartender when I heard Nick ask for a Coke. I turned and he smiled at me and asked if the seat next to me was taken? I just shook my head and he sat down. At first I didn't think he recognized me but after a few minutes he said, "So where is your daughter?" I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I said she was asleep with my Mom, in their room. He smiled and asked if I wanted to get out of here? "What was I going to say? No? I went to pay for my drink but Nick told the bartender to charge it to his room." I followed Nick to the elevator and we went up to the 18th floor. I could hear Ronda and Ashley laughing but Nick and I headed for his room which was around the corner, away from the noise.

Chapter 2

He opened the door and held it for me. I stepped into his hotel room and it was completely dark. He closed the door and I could hear him searching for the light switch. He then said I know there is a lamp somewhere over here and then he bumped into me. I fell forward and landed on his bed. I could smell his cologne on something that was on the bed. I inhaled deeply, hoping to remember that sent forever. He finally found a light and turned it on. He smiled and asked if I needed anything? Still I could not speak I just shook my head. He asked if I was going to be this quiet all night? I nearly choked on my own saliva. Did he want me to spend the whole night with him? I quickly said no, I'm sorry I'm just nervous. He said there wasn't anything to be nervous about. He remembered me from the concert and he commented on how adorable my daughter is. He had a few days off and wanted to see the city with someone. He was tired of spending all of his waking hours with the guys. He wanted someone who was fun. I said but I gotta drive my friends back home tomorrow. He looked a little disappointed, then I said well I guess Ronda can drive them home. I can always fly back. He smiled and said he knew he was going to like me. He sat down on the bed next to me and asked me if I was hungry? Then he switched the television on and Aliens came on. Sigourney Weaver, his favorite actress. He picked up the phone and had a lot of food sent up and then he slipped out of his shoes and scooted up on the bed. I was feeling out of place for a minute until he told me to get comfortable and sit with him. I slid my shoes off and sat back on the bed with him. About 30 minutes later there was a knock on the door. Room Service, said a voice from the other side. Nick let him in and then signed the slip and the guy left. Nick ate and I watched, I was not hungry. Nick fell asleep during the movie and then I fell asleep. Somewhere in the middle of the night I felt Nick's hand move up my shirt. Cindy are you awake, he asked? His hand moved down the front of my pants and his fingers made their way into my panties. If he was testing for wetness he was about to get soaked! I could feel his hot breath on my face now and his lips brushing over mine ever so lightly. I couldn't help but respond. I kissed him back. He forced his tongue inside my mouth and his breathing started getting harder. His hands were making there way back up my shirt and he began to undress me. I kept saying why is this happening? I was enjoying it. Nick now had me stripped down to my bra and underwear. He stood up and began to undress and then he came down on top of me. He asked if I was okay? Yes, I responded. He was totally nude and lying on top of me. He began to lick my neck and kiss my neck. It made my nipples hard with excitement. He removed my bra and asked if I liked that? I said yes. He again licked my neck and then sucked on my nipples. He moved his hands down into my underwear and fingered my clit again. Oh baby you are so wet, he said. He slipped me out of my bra and underwear and then his face disappeared between my legs. I have never known such pleasure. He sucked on my clit and with his hand rolled my nipples between his thumbs and forefingers. I had my first orgasm. For the next twenty minutes or so all Nick did was rub, suck and caress my body.

Chapter 3

I was getting impatient I want him inside of me. He rolled over on his back and I grabbed his dick and sucked on it. He loved it, he said he had never had anyone suck on his dick before. It made me feel special, in a way. If sucking on someone's dick can make someone feel special. Anyway, I had to have him inside of me so I climbed up and mounted the big boy. He moaned with pleasure as I lowered myself onto him. He begged me not to move. He said he was so enjoying my pussy. I squeezed my muscles and he again moaned in enjoyment. He pulled my face to his and he kissed me, almost sucking the life right out of me. We were both enjoying each other we hadn't heard a knock on the door. Nick rolled me off of him and began to fuck me like there was no tomorrow. Sweat was dripping off his forehead and I could see his body gleaming with sweat from the moonlight filtering in through the window. He cause me to reach another Orgasm and then he released his load deep inside me. He fell on top of me and continued to kiss my neck. I returned the kisses. He especially liked to be kissed on his neck. It was almost as if he was unable to move when I sucked on his neck. He enjoyed it so much. I left hickys all over his neck. He was quite pround of them later. He'd never had a hicky. We fell asleep, our naked bodies intertwined together. The next morning I woke up and grabbed my clothes and took a shower while Nick slept. Nick woke from his sleep and joined me in the shower. He plugged the drain of the jacuzzi bathtub and allowed the tub to fill with the water that ran off our bodies. As the tub filled he switched the shower off and lowered me gently into the tub. He again fucked me like it was his first time. I had never done it in a tub before. I again sucked on his neck and the excitement it generated made his dick harder, or so it seemed. He finally broke off and we climaxed together. He removed the stopper from the drain and turned the shower back on. He took the soap and washed every inch of my body. He took care to lather up my feet and work upwards. Pausing over my womanhood he gave me a look that I'll never forget. I returned the favor of washing his body. Kissing his dick as I washed him. He flexed his muscle in appreciation. I made my way down his long legs to his strong feet. Taking care to wash between every toe. We rinsed off and Nick ordered room service. We ate breakfast together and I had to go. Nick promised to buy my ticket back home if I would please stay with him. I told him I'd be right back. I had to say goodbye to my family and friends and extended my stay at the hotel. He stopped me at the door and said, "Stay in this room with me." I nearly dropped to my knees. He kissed me so passionately before I left I almost considered not telling anyone where I was. I told him to give me an hour. He pouted, "that long?" I said 45 minutes, tops! I kissed him goodbye and headed down to my floor.

Chapter 4

I was so excited, who do I tell? Do I tell anyone? I knocked on my mom's door. My daughter was awake and said hello. No hug or anything. The truth is she spent a lot of time with my Mom. I love her dearly and I know she loves me, I do my best and that's all I can do. She was watching cartoons anyway. Mom on the otherhand was packing and ready to go home. I asked her if I could help her with anything? She said no, but she noticed a change in me. I was happier. She got a smile on her face and asked if I had met someone? I just smiled and said, I'm glad you asked that. She sat down and waited for me to speak. I told her I met someone that I knew and he had asked me to stay behind in New Orleans for a few days. Her face began to darken a little. I said I am on vacation, Ronda will drive yall back and he promised to buy a ticket for me. I'll be home in a few days. She said did you tell your daughter yet? I swallowed hard and shook my head no. I said I have to talk to Ronda and Ashley first. She said well they were all fixin' to leave in a few minutes so I better go and break the news now. I told her I'd be right back. I ran out the door and down to Ronda and Ashley's room. I knocked on the door and Ronda answered. You ready Cindy? she asked. No, not quite. I closed the door behind me and listened to them tell me I didn't look very good. I had no makeup on and my hair was still wet. I sat down on one of the beds and said I wasn't going back with them. Ronda dropped her makeup case. Your not what? she said. I looked down at my hands and told her I had met someone and he had asked me to stay behind with him for a few days. They both started to yell at me telling me how dangerous that was. I told them I trusted him. Then Ashley said, "I thought you were saving yourself for Nick Carter?" I couldn't meet their eyes. Ronda sat down next to me and said, Darlin' what's his name? All I could do was smile. Then the Oh My God's started. Nick Carter? Is it Nick Carter? I nodded my head and my smile got bigger. Have you slept with him Ashley asked me? I could only nod. Then they screamed. Ronda was concerned with protection, Ashley wanted to know if he was good, they were both talking at the same time. I said WAIT!!! Please, Ronda I need you to drive my Mom and daughter home. Take my car, I handed her my keys. I'll call yall in a few days. I looked at my watch. Damn, I jumped up and headed for the door. What's your hurry Ronda asked? I said Nick's waiting. They both laughed and told me to have fun. I ran back to my mom's room and they were both packed. I could tell my Mom said something to my daughter. I sat down with her and told her I was going to stay behind for a few days, but I'd be home at the end of the week. She said it was all right. I walked them all down to the car and helped them get loaded and on there way. As they pulled away from the hotel, I felt a huge knot forming in my stomach. What am I doing I said out loud?

Chapter 5

I went inside the hotel and up to Nick's floor. The body guard let me pass. I knocked on Nick's door. I felt really awkward. I felt even more so when he didn't answer the door. I tried the door and it was unlocked. I walked into the room. He had the drapes drawn and I noticed his feet at the end on the bed. It was like there was an invisible wall because he feet were right at the edge. Not hanging over but almost. I walked deeper into the room and noticed that Nick was asleep. He was nude too. He was such a beautiful man. I tried to memorize every inch of him. Even while in a deep sleep he was hard! His lips were parted ever so slightly. I could hear his breathing. I watched his chest rise and fall, rise and fall. I felt myself becoming excited watching him sleep. Maybe it was because I was afraid he'd wake up and catch me watching him. Or maybe because it was Nick Carter and I just couldn't believe this was happening. I couldn't wait any longer, I removed my clothing and straddled his waist. He still didn't move. I slowly inserted his dick inside me. He began to stir. I lowered my nipple into his mouth and he automatically began to suck on it. His eyes snapped open and then he closed them and continued sucking on my nipples. He began to thrust his hips up into me causing me to moan with excitement. His hands were all over me. He rolled me off him and asked what took me so long? I told him I'd been waiting for him my whole life, what was an hour to him? He brushed his lips over mine. Flicking his tongue inside my mouth making me hot. His tongue entered deep inside my mouth and then he kissed my neck. Then he said it. He said my name. Cindy. I need to fuck you, he said. He fucked me until I climaxed. Then I sucked on his neck. I think he enjoyed that almost as much as his blowjob. I slid down his body and began to suck on his dick. His back arched in responce and his toes were curled tight. I took his testicles inside my mouth and gently sucked on them. Again he said my name. Cindy, that's so fucking incredible he said. I flicked my tongue over the head of his dick and he cried out. Fuck me Cindy, I need to be inside of you babe. Babe? Did he just call me babe? I climbed on top of his huge dick. It was thick and long. I'm suprised he could walk. I fucked him until he came again. Then he pulled me down on top of him and he kissed me so passionately I felt myself melting in his embrace. I curled up inside his arms and he asked me what I wanted to do for the rest of the day? I said this is fine, we don't have to leave. He laughed he said he was hungry. I said I'd have to go down to my room to shower and change. He leaned up on his arm propping his head on his hand. He said I meant it when I said I want you to stay with me. He rubbed my face with his incredilby long fingers. He has the most beautiful hands. They are soft and very masculine. He brushed my hair up off my forehead and asked me which room I was in? I told him my room number and asked him why? He picked up the phone by the bedside and asked someone named Paulie to cart all of my belongings up to his room. Then he hung up. 45 minutes later all of my belongings were in Nick's room. I was in the shower and when I came out Nick was putting my clothes in the dresser drawers with his. I almost fainted.

Chapter 6

Nick took his shower, he sings in the shower I had my own private concert. Once he was dressed he gave me one of he baseball caps and said let's go eat. I said why the hat? He said I'd see soon enough. We disappeared down the escalator through the cafe and out the back door. There were 3 girls that approached him immediately for his autograph. He signed them and posed for pictures. We walked side by side down Bourbon Street and then took one of the many side streets until Nick found what he was looking for. We entered into a small cafe that looked run down. He always comes to this restaurant he told me. The host knew him by sight. He escorted us to a back table in a corner and we both ordered some of the local cuisine. Nick grabbed my hand and kissed it. He hadn't held my hand since we left the hotel. He sensed my reservations and he scooted closer to me. He kissed me and said he was really enjoying my company. It brought a slight smile to my face. Our soup and salads came and we began our meal. We ate until we were stuffed. Nick paid the bill and when we walked out the sun was already setting. We walked back up Bourbon Street and Nick bought us a large Hurricane to share. I grabbed for his hand a few times but he pulled away. I was wondering if he was ashamed to be seen with me. I could feel my tears beginning to form. I blinked them back and tried not to be so sad. Nick noticed a difference and asked me if everything was all right? I just faked a smile and told him I had a headache and needed to lie down. We walked back to the hotel and once we got inside the elevator he grabbed my hand. I let go and pretended I had an itch. We walked off the elevator and into his room and he started to kiss me. I pulled away and told him I had to lie down a minute. He was beginning to be worried about me. I told him I was sure it would pass. I lied down on my side facing the wall so that he couldn't see my tears. I felt so rejected. What does he really think of me? Am I just another girl? Will he love me and leave me? Yesterday I wouldn't have minded, but today I mind. I don't want him to think that I'm like this with everyone. Because I'm not. I was soaking the pillow with my tears. I had to get up, my mascara was running. Nick was sitting on the couch watching the Basketball game so I got up and hurried into the bathroom. I washed the mascara from my face and tried to soothe my puffy eyes. Nothing worked. When I opened the door Nick was waiting for me. What's wrong he asked me? I started to say something but he stopped me. He said I hope you don't think I'm using you, because I'm not. I feel drawn to you. I don't know why, but I noticed you in the audience and pointed you out to the staff. I picked you for the perfect fan. My tears were unstoppable. He asked why I was crying? I just shook it off and tried to walk past him. He pulled me to him and asked me again what was wrong? I just blurted it out, Are you ashamed to be seen with me in public? He was shocked by my question but he released my arm and allowed me to pass. Why, I, why would you even say that? he asked. I didn't answer him. Cindy, why? he asked again. I said behind closed doors you can't keep your hands off me, but once we got off that elevator it's like I had the plague or something. He said is that what's bothering you? Honey, it's not you. Public displays of affection just make me uncomfortable. I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings. He lifted my face with his hands and with his thumbs he wiped away my tears. He said for me he'd try to be more affectionate. I just looked at him and said why for me? He said I don't know. It's just this feeling I have that I know you from somewhere.

Chapter 7

The rest of the time that we spent together Nick was more affectionate like he promised. He held my hand and even kissed me a few times as we wondered through the quarter. One evening we walked by this lady, she was a fortune teller or something. When Nick and I stood by and watched her she looked at us. She finished with her customer and Nick and I sat down. I said I wanted her to tell me my future. She looked from Nick to me and started shaking. She chanted something that we couldn't understand but Nick and I just laughed. I laid out my hand and she took it. She said you two have known each other for a long time? Nick laughed and said no, we just met. She looked at us again and said, no you've met before. I sense it. You have a child together. We bothed laughed, she was awful at this. Nick and I tried to leave but she said, no let me continue I won't charge you. So we said fine. She let go of my hand and grabbed Nick's hand. Then she started shaking again. There's been so much pain. Something... I...just can't put my finger on it. Then she dropped Nick's hand and stood up. She was frightened but we had no idea what the heck was going on. Nick said, Cindy let's get out of here. She didn't try to stop us. We left and walked through the stores and Nick bought me many little gifts. I kept telling him I didn't need anything. He bought a few things for my daughter too. We walked back to the hotel and we noticed the woman's stand was closed up. We both laughed. I had to leave the next day so we stayed together in the room mostly. Nick was learning some new things. He bought some motion lotion and he rubbed it all over me. He then started with my toes and licked every inch of my body. By the time he got to my neck I couldn't hold back anymore. He fucked me and we ended back in the shower. He lifted me up onto his hard dick and finished me off there. First time for me I told him. What he asked? I've never had an orgasm in the shower. He laughed and said he was glad he was the one. I loved him but I didn't want to scare him by telling him I was "in" love with him. The next morning we rode to the airport in silence. I was miserable I didn't want to leave him. I asked him if I'd ever see him again? He promised we would. He asked for my phone number, I gave it to him. He took me to my gate and kissed me goodbye, I told him I was really going to miss him. We just stared into each other's eyes. I could see him tearing up. "Final call for flight 1200 to Mobile now boarding through gate 4, all confirmed passengers should now be onboard." I guess this is it, I said. He kissed me and said he'd call me. I kissed him again and gave the ticket to the agent. I walked down the jetway in tears. Why was I feeling like this? It just didn't make sense. I got to the door of the aircraft and the flight attendant told me my seat was to the left. I looked at my boarding pass. Seat 1A. I was in first class, it just made me cry harder. I took my seat, luckily no one was sitting next to me. I looked out the window and saw Nick standing watching the aircraft. Paulie, who had driven us to the airport was with him. He had one hand on Nick's shoulder. Nick appeared to be whiping tears away. I didn't have my contacts in or my glasses handy so I couldn't be sure. The plane started to push back and I saw Nick turn to walk away. Paulie still had his hand on Nick's shoulder.

Chapter 8

I arrived in Mobile and Ronda and Ashley picked me up. As soon as I got off the aircraft I fell into Ronda's arms. I couldn't stop crying. Ronda said she was happy to see me too, but this was ridiculous. We went down to baggage claim and I picked up my bags. I couldn't talk. I sat in the backseat staring out the window. The girls were talking to me but I was totally out of it. I got home and my daughter was so glad to see me. I was glad to have her, I don't know what I would be like if I lived alone. She said someone named Nick called me 10 minutes ago. He said he'd call you back. I thanked her and she went out to play with her friends. I sat at my table and my Mom told me I looked like hell. I thanked her for watching Megan and she stood to leave. Are you all right? she asked. I just nodded and the tears started again. She hugged me and kissed me on the head. I love you Cindy, she said and then she left. Ronda and Ashley said, what happened in New Orleans? What's wrong? Did he hurt you? Why are you like this? The phone rang, I knocked my chair over jumping up for it. Nick said hey baby. I walked into my bedroom closing the door behind me leaving Ronda and Ashley at my kitchen table. Hello I said. He said I didn't sound happy to be home. I said oh I am, but I just wish, well you know. He said I know. We talked for about 40 minutes and then he had to go. He had to get some sleep he had a flight first thing in the morning. He said he missed me, he missed me a lot. I thought he was crying but maybe, it was just my imagination. I said goodbye and walked into the kitchen. Ronda and Ashley had raided my pantry. They looked at me and asked what was wrong? I said nothing why? Ronda handed me a tissue. I hadn't even realized I was crying. I sat down with them and asked if it was possible to fall in love with someone so completely that they consume you? Ashley said only in the movies. Ronda laughed but she was concerned for me I could tell. She asked if I'd be all right? I smiled and said sure, I grabbed for the bag of chips and asked if they left me any Coke? We talked about the lady in the quarter and Ronda was intrigued. She said I should get hypnotized and find out if I knew Nick in another life. I laughed, you don't belive in that stuff do you? She said not really but she'd heard a lot of wild stories and anything was possible. We talked a while longer and then they left. I called for my daughter to come in to take a bath. Once she was done we sat on the sofa and watched a movie together. I couldn't help thinking about Nick, and what Ronda had said. Maybe that's what the fortune teller was picking up. My daughter had fallen asleep and I carried her to her bed. I watched her sleep. I was shocked when I noticed that her lips parted just like Nick's do when he sleeps. I heard the fortune teller's voice saying, you have a child together?" It gave me the chills. I went and took a shower and climbed into bed. I was exhausted and I had to work tomorrow. How I was going to get through the day? I still had no idea.

Chapter 9

The next day I was useless. I left at noon and didn't return. My daughter was in school so I went home. I signed onto the internet and looked up the schedule for the Backstreet Boys. I then proceeded to call every hotel in Houston. I asked for Nick Carter's room. Of course they had no one registered by that name. Then I asked for Paulie's room. I found them. Paulie answered and he remembered me. He said he didn't think we should be talking. I asked him why? He said Nick's been so miserable since I left that he wasn't sleeping well and having weird dreams and stuff. Something about knowing you from a past life. I froze, I didn't say anything for a few minutes and then he asked if I was still there? I said I'm here. He said so maybe it's not a good idea. I was stunned and then I said well you decide and then I hung up. I laid on my bed and remembered my dream from the night before. I had dreamt that I lived on a farm with my husband and son. I remember that my husband and son had the same mannerisms. They looked alike and we were all so happy. I just remember the love I felt. It was amazing, I woke up crying. I was no where near being that happy with my exhusband. I tried to clean up around my house but it was no use. I decided to go pick up my daughter and then go buy some groceries. She was happy to see me again. It just warmed my heart whenever she smiled at me. We were heading to the grocery store and she asked why I was crying? Am I crying? It must be these contacts. My eyes hurt a little honey, but I'm okay, don't you worry. She said I love you Mom. I held her hand as I drove towards the grocery store. We parked the car and she wanted to ride in the "buggy." We went through the store and I bought what I needed and headed to the coke aisle. I couldn't find the 20oz cokes anywhere. It was making me crazy. I could only find the 16oz cokes. My daughter was telling me it was nothing to cry about. Again I was crying? I have got to get a hold of myself. I threw the 16oz cokes in the buggy and headed for the checkout. I paid for the groceries and loaded them into the car and headed for home. My daughter asked if there was anything I needed to tell her? I said no honey, why do you ask? She said I was crying a lot and usually when people cry something bad happens. I told her it was my contacts. You watch when we get home I'll take them out and I won't cry anymore. Okay? She smiled and nodded. She reached across the center console and grabbed my hand. I took a deep breath and blinked back tears and headed for home. Nick had left a message with the number and room number to his hotel. He asked me to call him when I got home. We put away the groceries and my daughter headed outside to play again. It was getting cool in Alabama now. Thanksgiving was coming and the family would be getting together up North. I called Nick back and he was glad to hear my voice. He said he was just getting ready to call me. He asked me how I was? I said lonely, he said he was too. He missed me. I miss you too I said. We made small talk and he said he wanted to get together with me soon. I told him I would like that. He promised to call me back later, he had to go some prior commitment that he couldn't get out of. I hung up with him and started to fix dinner. I kept feeling like every move I made or thought I had, that I had had before. Kind of like déjà vu. I turned on some music and took my contacts out and put my glasses on. My daughter came in and I said look! No tears! She thought I was losing my mind, I was sure of it.

Chapter 10

Nick didn't call back that night. My daughter had gone to bed hours ago and I was fighting sleep. Once asleep I dreamt about that family again. Was it me? I couldn't see who it was. The man was very handsome. He stood just over 6 feet tall with white, white hair. He looked to be about 27, 28. The little boy was the spitting image of his father. They laughed and played together. He was in love with his wife. He was spinning her around. His hands slid down to her butt. She playfully slapped them away. He stood behind her as she cooked. His arms around her waste. I woke up. I couldn't shake this feeling of something not being right. I used the bathroom and went back to sleep. I saw them in bed. I still couldn't see her face though. They were making love. He was enjoying it. She was on top of him. OMG, SHE WAS KISSING HIS NECK! I sat upright in bed. I have got to stop this. I fell back asleep but didn't dream about them anymore. I woke up to the alarm and headed for the shower. I dropped my daugher off at school and buried myself in my work. Everyday I'd come home to a message from Nick. I didn't call him back. How was this going to work? He traveled and I was neglecting my family and friends. My work was suffering. I had to snap out of this. After a few weeks Nick stopped calling. My daughter and I headed up to my families house in Northern Alabama. We picked up my Mom and dad and we drove up north together. My Mom was glad to see that I was back to my old self again. I let her believe that I was over Nick, the truth of the matter was, I wasn't. I still dreamt about the family on the farm. I still couldn't see all the faces. Would I ever? The holiday passed and I survived. Ronda keeps telling me to go get hypnotized and find out what's going on. I can't afford that, and besides I don't believe it. Besides, Nick hasn't called me back. I continued to work and get on with my life. Things were fine I don't think of Nick ... much. Christmas is only a few weeks away and my daughter has expensive taste for a 7 year old. I've gotten her most of what she's asked for. I'm glad I can do that for her. She puts up with a lot from me. She's a great kid and I'm blessed to have her in my life. Ashley and Ronda have surprised me with a gift cerificate to a hypnotherapist. I would get 4 visits. I thank them both and put the certificate away. I gave them their presents and we joined in with the office Christmas Party.

Chapter 11

New Years Eve was fast approaching and the girls were after me to use my certificate. They said that it costs a lot and they didn't want me not using it. I promised that I would after the first of the year. Nick called me on New Years Eve, but again I wasn't home. I was suprised to hear his voice after all this time. It hasn't been too long, but my heart still stopped at the sound of his voice. He wished me love and happiness. He said he thinks of me everyday. Then he hung up. I checked on my daughter and again noticed her lips parted just like Nicks. I watched the rythum of her chest rising and falling. Then I went to bed. For the first time in a long time I dreamt of the family on the farm. It was cold and snowing and the man couldn't work. He seemed to be worried. He was pushing his son away a lot. He no longer spun his wife around. I woke up to the alarm and got up to get ready for work. The sitter was coming for my daughter so I straightened up the house a little. I was searching the radio station for some good music and stopped on Mariah Carey's, "I still Believe." I couldn't help but think of the couple in my dream. I pulled into the parking lot of my job and was met by Ronda and Ashley at the door. You have an appointment today at 2p.m. I do? With whom I asked? The Hypnotherapist they both said. I rolled my eyes and walked past them into the office building. They followed me to my office and said I had to go, it was all arranged. If I canceled now they'd have to pay a fee for it. I checked my schedule to see if I could get out of it but Ronda was a step ahead of me. Oh no girl, we checked your schedule you have nothing planned. I gave up and told them I would go. Through the day they would poke their heads in my office and remind me that at 2 I had the appointment. Even on their break they'd be outside and walk up to my window and point to their watches. I finally got tired of it and left at 1pm. They watched me leave and met me at the door? Where are you going they asked? I said lunch, do I need your permission now? Ronda said just don't forget your appointment. I smiled and left. I headed for some fast food and found myself sitting in the parking lot of the Hypnotherapist. Should I just go in and pay the fee? Oh heck, I might as well go in I'm here. I met with the Hypnotherapist. His name was Nick, what a coincidence. Anyway, he asked me why I wanted this done, etc., etc., etc. I told him it was a gift from some friends and I was uncomfortable with the whole experience. He said it's a very relaxing experience. He seemed so calm and friendly that I just said okay, so how long does this take? He laughed and told me to get comfortable. I asked if I should lay down? He said whatever gets you to relax. I laid on his couch and listened to his voice. I could feel myself relaxing. I figured if he puts me to sleep then he puts me to sleep.

Chapter 12

He took me back to my childhood. I remembered my Mom and dad and little brother. It was like I was still there. I was standing on the outside looking in. It was wild. My dad would take up the bathroom developing his photos. Mom's home cooking, and my little brother bugging me and my friends. Again he took me further back. From my best friend in grade school, to birthday parties. Then all too quickly it was over. He brought me out of it and said now that wasn't painful was it? I said is it over? He smiled and said to check with his secretary and book another visit with her. I gladly did. I didn't go back to work, instead I went home and took a nap. I was exhausted. I again dreamt about the family. They were slowly drifting apart. I saw the couple arguing more and more. The little boy kept to himself most of the time. The mother would try to comfort him but he would just push her away. My heart was breaking for this family that I didn't even know. I woke up and went to get my daughter. I suddenly missed her and needed her with me. She was glad to see me and we went out to dinner. She told me all about her day and how this boy who lives across the street from the sitter, likes her. She still thinks boys are gross but I could tell a little that she was happy he liked her. We even went to see a movie. I wanted her to love me and be glad that I was her mother. Why I was all of a sudden feeling insecure I couldn't tell you. We got home pretty late and she went right to bed. I had to call Ronda back. She was a little upset that I didn't come back to work today. I tried her line but it was busy. I lied on the bed planning on calling her in a few minutes but I fell asleep. Again I dreamt of the couple. They were having sex, but they weren't making love. The weather was warming up again. Spirits seemed to be improving. I noticed smiles on the dad's face again. My alarm went off too soon again. I was way into this imaginary family. I went into the office and Ronda was waiting to pounce on me. She wanted to know everything. I told her about the visit and that I had another one in a month. She didn't especially like having to wait a month for another update. I said the coupon says one visit a month. She felt cheated somehow but left me alone. My phone rang and at first I had no idea who it was. Cindy it's Paulie! Oh Paulie, how are you? He said he was fine but Nick's going through some depression. We can't snap him out of it. I said how can I help him if you can't? He said they were heading back to New Orleans in a few weeks and wanted me to meet them there. He feels if Nick sees me again he'd snap out of it. I pulled out my calendar and asked him when? February 26th. We get in town on the 25th though, can you be there? That was the date of my next Hypnotherapy session. He said he'd take care of everything the airplane ticket the hotel room, everything. I thought I'd really like to see Nick again. Okay sure Paulie, you take care of everything.

Chapter 13

The next few weeks flew by I kept having my dreams about the family and my daydreams were filled with Nick. How was I going to react to seeing him again after all these months? Why was he depressed? And why did Paulie think that I could snap him out of it? My daughter was going to be spending a few days with my Mom while I went to New Orleans. I didn't tell anyone why I was going, only that it was business. Ronda and Ashley were sorry they couldn't come with me, I didn't invite them but we always take road trips together. It was weird going away without them this time. On the Thursday before I was to leave I had a Hypnotherapy session planned. I was able to move it back a day. I left the office early and said good bye to Ronda and Ashley. I'll be back on Monday. I hugged them both goodbye and headed for the Hypnotherapist's office. I was excited about seeing Nick tomorrow. I hadn't been sleeping much and I've been very distracted. I felt this black cloud hanging over me for weeks now. It felt heavier now. I checked in and sat down waiting for the therapist to join me. He finally arrived and asked if I was all right? I said yes why? He handed me a tissue. What's this for I asked him? He asked why I was crying? I brought my hands to my face and felt that it was wet from tears. I wiped my face and told him that it was my contacts. They've been bothering me lately. He just looked at me. He said have you ever been a blonde? I laughed and said only briefly, why? He said oh nothing... He sat down and asked me to get comfortable. He put me into a trance and started to bring me back. I was three and playing in the backyard with friends and family. I was 1 and learning how to walk. I was in my mother's tummy and everything was dark. But then there was this light. I asked what's the light? The therapist said lets go find out. He thought it was the light at the end of the birth canal, he was not ready to hear what I was about to say. I started screaming.... I was calling for someone named Jason. Jason where are you? Jason answer me! The therapist said who is Jason? My voice changed and I said my son. Have you seen him? Jason! I was banging on something. Again the therapist asked me what was I doing? I said I don't know. It's dark and hot, and I can't breathe. I started to cough. He told me it was all right. Just step outside of your body. Where are you and what's happening? I backed up and I could see a woman. She was trapped inside her home. It was on fire. There is someone inside there. It's Jason. He's not breathing. She can't open the door and she's losing her fight to live. She's fainted now. Or maybe she's dead. I don't know. The therapist asked me to look around outside. I turned around and saw the farm that was in my dreams. Oh my God! Then I saw this pickup truck raising towards me. I felt myself jump out of the way in fear of being run over. It was the woman's husband. The house was fully engulfed in flames. He was screaming and crying. He was calling for Jason and Cindy. Cindy? He broke down the door with an ax and dragged his wife's lifeless body out. He was screaming no! and why me! He ran inside and found his son's body. He laid them together on the ground and cried. I noticed other people were around us now. The fire department was attempting to put out the house fire. An ambulance had been dispatched and loaded his wife and sons bodies into the ambulance. Mr. Carter I'm sorry about your family.

The therapist brought me out of it. I was crying so hard that I couldn't catch my breath. Cindy? Mr. Carter? I asked him what that all means? He said that it appears we have tapped into a former life of yours. I was married, lived on a farm and died with my son in a house fire. He didn't know how long ago it was or anything else. He said next visit we'd explore more. I don't remember leaving the office. I just remember sitting in my car. A security officer startled me by asking if I was all right? I said yes and headed for home.

Chapter 14

For once I was glad my daughter wasn't home. I couldn't get a hold of my emotions. Maybe I should cancel this trip to New Orleans. I'm in no condition to help Nick, I can't even help myself. But wait! I should go to New Orleans. That woman in the Quarter she knows something. I know she does. I grabbed my itinerary that Paulie sent to me. I was on an 11 a.m. flight. I called the airline and was changed to the earlier flight. I finished packing up my luggage and made some dinner. Although I wasn't hungry it was something to do. I couldn't concentrate on television so I signed online and talked to a few friends. I'm glad to have friends in my life they are always there to pick me up when I'm down. After a few hours online I went to bed. I've been so afraid to sleep lately because of this dream. But now it wasn't a dream anymore. Now it was real, it was me in those dreams. I had a son and a husband who loved me. But what happened? Why the fire and who was my husband? I fell asleep in my bed and fell quickly into a dream. My goodness it was like watching a home movie this time. I saw some people I'm assuming were my parents and I had a brother and two sisters. We were a very close family. One sister was a few years younger and another sister was a lot younger than I. Next I saw this boy. I was in love with him. We would swim in the pond out behind a barn. Ride the school bus together and we even went to a carnival. Next I was getting married to that boy. I was walked down the aisle by that man whom I'm assuming was my father. The woman who was probably my mother was crying. My brother was a grooms man and my sisters were my bridesmaids. Next I was having a baby! The most precious baby in the world. At first I thought it was my daughter, but then I noticed it was a boy. Jason... We returned back to the farmhouse. It's the same one from my dreams. Jason's nursery was right off the master bedroom. Life for them was perfect. Or was it? I still can't see her face. Is it me? The alarm again woke me up at the worst time. I took a shower and headed out to the airport. I called a taxi so that I wouldn't have to pay an arm and a leg for parking. I had my itinerary that said I had an electronic ticket for the Delta flight to New Orleans. I got checked in without any hassle. I took my seat on the plane and snoozed a little to New Orleans. My flight landed and I picked up my bags and took another taxi to the hotel. I got checked in and dropped my bags and headed down to Bourbon to find that lady. I looked and looked and couldn't find her. I headed back to the hotel. I had spent many hours down there with no luck. I got to the front of the hotel and all of a sudden there was a major commotion behind me. I turned to see Nick getting out of a car with tinted windows. I couldn't move, I just froze in my tracks. Nick saw me too. He had tears in his eyes and he called my name. I ran over to him and he lifted me in the air and swung me around. His hands slipped down to my butt. I slapped them away. We both looked at each other. Nick had the strangest look in his eye. I said déjà vu? He said you too? We went inside and up to our room. He was staying with me. I didn't not know this. We barely made it into the room.

Chapter 15

We stripped our clothes off and made love. I have missed you so much he told me. He kissed me so deeply and began to pleasure me like before. Making sure to pay close attention so that every inch of my body was pleasured. We climaxed together and then we held each other so tight. It was like we'd been apart a lifetime. I wanted to crawl inside his chest and stay there forever. Nick asked why I hadn't returned his phone calls? I rolled over to face him. I'm sorry I said, I just couldn't stand being apart from you. I could see tears in his eyes. What's wrong Nick? He said I thought I let you down again. I couldn't see you, I couldn't talk to you. I said what do you mean again? Nick said what? I said you said you thought you let me down again. He said I just missed you so much. I kissed him and said I have got to go out for a little while. There is someone I have to find. Nick sat up and said he had to go out too. We both got dressed and I told him I'd be back as soon as I could. He kissed me so passionately and then he told me he loved me. I felt the tears flow from my lids as I told him I loved him too. He walked me to the elevator but he kept leaning in to kiss me so the door kept opening up again. I can't remember the last time I felt this good. I headed downstairs and ran into Paulie. He asked if I'd seen Nick? I just left him I said. He looked behind me and asked where he was? I said he's still up in the room. Did you two talk he asked? I just smiled. Then he smiled and said, I see. I gave him a hug and walked out the door. He called after me asking what was that (the hug) for? I didn't answer him. I had a spring in my step again and love in my heart. I headed back down to Bourbon, the sun is setting and this is when I found her the last time. I walked the streets looking and looking for her little booth. It took me almost an hour but I found it. I walked up through the crowd of people and noticed Nick sitting at the table. The woman was obviously upset. Nick kept saying, "I know you know what all this means!" I was about to say something but then he mentioned dreams that he couldn't get out of his head. I stepped back so that he wouldn't see me and the lady wouldn't see me. He mentioned a fire. He mentioned losing his child and his wife, but it wasn't him. He couldn't see his face. I just started crying, we must have been together in a former life. That's the only logical explanation to why we are drawn to each other. He was yelling at her now and she was scared. I moved through the crowd and grabbed his arm. He looked at me. He had been crying. Cindy? What are you doing here? I said the same reason you're here. He followed me back to the hotel. He kept me close the whole way. He wouldn't even stop to sign autographs. We blew through the lobby. Paulie saw us come in and his smile faded. He asked if everything was all right? Nick ignored him but I smiled and said we were fine. We went up the elevator and Nick held me so close. The doors opened and we went into the hotel room. He finally let go of me and sat on the bed with his head in his hands. I asked him what was wrong?

Chapter 16

He had a hard time looking at me. He said ever since our last time here he hasn't been the same. I sat down next to him and said, neither have I. He said he's been unable to sleep, he keeps having these weird dreams. He can't concentrate. I just nodded along with what he was saying. I said, these dreams your having, do they take place on a farm? He nearly fell off the bed. He looked at me like I had sucker punched him. I said there a three people in the house. A man, woman, and child. Nick was speechless. How do you know, he finally asked me? Who told you about my dreams? I've only told the fellas and they would never tell. Then he said, have you talked to AJ? I said no why? Then he said nevermind. I told him the reason I knew about the dreams was because I was in them. Just when I thought his eyes couldn't open any wider they did. He said you couldn't have been ... you're here now. I sat down next to him and told him I had been hypnotized and what I knew. He was near tears as I relayed things from my dreams that he had dreamt about. Then I told him that I died, and my son died too. Then Nick said, our son died. Now it was my turn to be surprised. He said that was me in the blue pick up truck. It was freaky. I got up and walked around the room. This isn't real I kept saying. Then Nick said it makes perfect sense now. I said what does? He said we've found each other again. It's another life time and we've carried our love into this lifetime. Tears were streaming down both of our cheeks. There was a knock on the door. Nick looked through the peep hole and flashed me a strange look. He opened the door and I strained to see who it was. It was the woman from the quarter. I stood up and she entered the room. She looked from me to Nick and said, you know don't you? Nick and I both nodded our heads and invited her to sit down. I asked her to please tell us what was happening to us. Nick grabbed my hand beneath the table. It was our turn to shake, this gypsy woman now had nerves of steel. She began with me first. She told me that the people in my dream were still with me in this lifetime. I looked shocked. Your parents are still your parents but somehow their roles were confused your mother in your past life is now your father and vice versa. Mom was the more dominant one. Your sisters I believe they are your friends. Then she said Ashley and Ronda, are they friends? I'm getting those names. Are they familiar? Nick just looked at me and nodded to the woman. Then she sad your son is now your daughter. I stood up so fast the chair fell over and I had to lock myself in the bathroom. How can this be? Nick stayed out and got the scoop on his side of the story. I heard the door close and I came out. Nick was laying on his stomach with his head buried in a pillow. He was sobbing, his whole body shook. I sat down next to him on the bed and lay next to him. He said five little words to me but they have such an intense meaning to me now. He said, I missed you so much!

Chapter 17

Right then and there Nick and I knew that our love transcends everything. We found each other in a different life time. That has got to mean only one thing. We are meant to be together.

Nick, once he composed himself, made a few calls and the two of us were going to be hypnotized together. Nick was a little nervous but told him we could hold hands and it wouldn't be painful. It's actually very relaxing I told him. We had an appointment for 6pm tonight. The phone rang startling us both. It was Brian, they guys were all heading out for lunch and wanted to invite us along. Nick asked me if we wanted to go, he didn't seem to want to go but I said let's go. We will be entertained if not distracted. He smiled for the first time since we've been together today and then he told Brian we'd be right down. He pulled me up off the bed and kissed me. He said I won't lose you a second time. Now I smiled, I love you Nick. He kissed me and said he loved me too. We headed downstairs to meet up with the guys. Kevin was asking where Ronda was? I said she didn't come this time. He seemed extremely disappointed. We climbed into a couple of vans and headed to a restaurant. I can't remember laughing so hard. Nick and I were really enjoying ourselves. Then Kevin said, I'm glad that Cindy brings you so much joy Nick. It's good to have you back. It brought tears to my eyes. Nick wrapped his arm around me and kept me close. We were dropped off in the Quarter and we walked through some shops. AJ bought more hats and Brian bought some stuff for his family. Nick took me by the hand and said good bye to the guys, and that we'd catch up with them later. They looked confused but Nick had been quiet for the last half hour and that's unusual for him. So they gave him his space and told us to let them know when we got back. We walked off into a different direction. Nick seemed to have a lot on his mind. I kept asking if anything was wrong and he kept saying no. He finally stopped about 4 blocks down from where we had left the others. He said, I know that this is sudden but considering what we've been through and are going through I'd like to buy you something. I smiled, Nick you don't have to buy me things to show your love. He said well I'd like to take you inside this store. We were standing by three so I asked him which one? He said the one right behind me. I read the sign. "The" Engagement Ring Store. I asked him what was in there? He said Cindy we've found each other again, I don't want to live another lifetime without you. Will you marry me? My knees buckled but he caught me. I have loved him for so long. Even before I knew what I know now. I never even thought I'd ever get as close to him as to get an autograph. Now he's proposed and we've been together in another life. How weird is that? Nick this is moving too fast. Yes, I want to marry you more than anything. He grabbed my hand and pulled me up. But... He turned to look at me, we have issues. He said he didn't want to lose me. We could work through those issues. He only wanted to be with me. We just stared at each other for a few minutes. People walking between our gaze not bothering to go around. Then I smiled and he smiled. We went inside and he bought an engagement ring.

Chapter 18

We went back to the hotel and called the fellas and told them we were back. We also told them we were going out again around 5:30 and not to worry. We made love again and Nick ordered Champagne to the room. We were so good together. We not only knew it, we felt it too. We showered and changed and headed out to our appointment. Nick was really nervous. I assured him it was okay. The driver kept looking at us in some perverted way. We were dropped off at the medical center and found our way to the fourth floor. We met the Hypnotherapist Lance, who would be putting us under. Nick let him know up front that money was no object, we needed to get to the root of this and if it took 3 hours, then it took three hours. The hypnotherapist understood. This office was much nicer than the one in Alabama. For one thing an entire wall was an acquarium. That put Nick at ease right away. The sofa's were wide enough that Nick and I could lay side by side comfortably. The Hypnotherapist dimmed the lights. Nick sat up and kissed me, he said whatever we find out I just want you to know I love you. I smiled and told him I loved him too. He lay back down and Lance began to relax us. Once we were under he took us back to the farm. We were under for 2 hours and we were able to find out that the farm was located in the state of Mississippi. We had an address and we also had our names. Nickolas, Cindy, and Jason Carter. We were married for 8 years until the house fire. Nick committed suicide that same night because he felt responcible for the death of Cindy and Jason. The underlying factors were he was losing the farm. Cut backs had to be made. Nick told his wife not to use the heater. She didn't, instead she used the stove to warm up the kitchen so that she and her son could keep warm. That particular day something went wrong. An oven MIT was too close to the open flame. It burned and then the curtains caught fire. Cindy told her son to go outside, but he was afraid and locked himself in his room. She thought she could put out the fire. The smoke and heat were what killed them both. Nick was working the farm when he saw smoke. He was angry because he thought his wife had disobeyed him by using up the firewood. Once he got closer to the house he realized what had happened. He just wanted her alive now. But he was too late. Once they confirmed to him that his family died due to an accident Nick felt even worse. He couldn't live with the guilt so he shot himself in the barn that night. The three of them were buried together in the local cemetary. We had that location as well. They had been married and eulogized in the same church we knew that now too. We had learned a lot and we were very grateful to Lance. Nick paid his fee and even Lance was surprised that we had found each other in another life. He then said those closest to you usually stay close to you. We thanked him and we left.

Chapter 19

Nick and I couldn't wait to get back to the hotel. We wanted to do some research. We stopped off at a store and bought some maps and some snacks. We called information looking for information on the cemetary and the church. We got both addresses and they were still active. We found the street the cemetary was on and also the church. We couldn't however find the street where the farm was. Nick had a concert tomorrow night but after that we'd drive up to Mississippi and find out what we could. It was only 2 hours from here. We couldn't believe how all this was coming together. We were laying on the bed a few hours in the pitch black. Nick tucked both his hands behind his head. I had my head on his shoulder. He said it makes sense now. I said what does? He said we died on the same day. That must be why we're together again now. I didn't know, all I knew was that I was tired. It had been a very emotional day. We woke up the next morning in the same position. I called home and checked in with everyone. For the first time in a long time, neither Nick or I had that dream. I don't even remember dreaming I told him. He smiled and said he couldn't remember either. The day flew by, rehearsal's and soundchecks. We met the guys for dinner and then Nick and I kind of vegged a little. I told him that as soon as the concert is over we'll leave for Mississippi. He said he was hoping I'd want to go. The opening act was performing and Nick stood in front of me anxious for the show to start. He surprised me by saying he wished my daughter was here. It brought tears to my eyes. My exhusband made it quite clear he didn't want to be in our lives anymore. My daughter still suffers to this day because she doesn't have a father. Nick could see the hurt in my face and he knew, he just knew what I was feeling. He said he should call her and invite her out here with us. A family should be together. I hugged him so tightly he made a comment about his ribs. He wiped the tears from my eyes and told me he loved me. He had to go now. He had a great time, I could tell. I sat off center and watched from the curtain. He was looking for me and then once he found me he played like I was the only one there. After the concert was over the guys all hugged Nick, it was great having you back man, they said. Nick said that he and I had something really important to take care of. They all hugged me good bye and we left for Mississippi. Nick changed back at the hotel and we rented a car and headed north. We checked into our hotel just after midnight. There was an old woman behind the counter and Nick asked who we might speak to about finding an old farmhouse that used to belong in his family. I had to smile at how he worded it. She said she'd lived here her whole life, she was sure she could help. He told her that the home was owned by the Carters in the mid 1960's until a house fire. She said oh that poor family. We looked at each other, you knew them we said in unison. She laughed, she said that couple used to do that too. They were a sweet family. So in love the envy of everyone. They lost the little boy too. Some say she was pregnant again. That's why she had the kitchen stove on to warm the house. Poor man killed himself that same night. No one found him until the next morning. He didn't leave a note, didn't have too. Nick interupted her, so where is this farm? Is it still standing? The woman showed us on the map where the house was. It's still there after all these years. Left in the same condition as it was. No one will touch it. I guess we keep hoping someone will come and take care of it like they did. She looked at the two of us and said maybe you two, you look just like him sir, if you don't mind me saying. His hair was white, white. But the face, the face is the same. We finished our business and went up to our room. Tomorrow was going to be a very emotional day.

Chapter 20

We got up early the next morning. We were too excited to eat but so decided to head to the cemetary instead. Luckily the grounds keeper was there and he was able to take us directly to the grave sites. The tree of them were buried together. The grounds keeper told us another story that even in death no one wanted to seperate them. A special casket was built. All three of them were buried together. They're love was so intense, I said. Nick grabbed my hand as we listened to more stories about this couple, that was us. The grounds keeper left us so that we could have some time alone at the grave. Nick and I just stared at the headstones. A simple phrase said it all.

"What God has brought together, let no one tear apart."

God has kept us together Nick, do you believe that? He wiped a tear away from his own eye and nodded in agreement. We noticed the surrounding gravestones. All Carter's. We slowly made our way back to the car and headed for the farm. It took us an hour to find it because the streets were not marked. But as we pulled onto this one farm, we knew we were home. Nick pulled the car to a stop in front of the burned out farm house. It was just a shell of what it used to be. We got out of the car and walked around the house. We came to the kitchen part of the house and it was awful. I found an old pendant and looked at it wondering if it belonged to us, or someone had dropped it. I put it in my pocket and saved it for later. Nick carried an old rusted out car. He smiled as he held it. Nick said this house could be rebuilt. He wondered aloud why no one rebuilt it. We came to the back of the house where the barn stood. Nick couldn't bring himself to go inside. I opened the rickety door and looked inside. There was still farm equipment in there. It was rusted out and covered in cob webs but other than that, the barn looked to be in pretty good shape. I walked around and images came back to me. Cows, and horses. Pigs even, it was weird. I'd never get that close to a cow, let alone a pig now a days. Nick called out to me and I walked back towards the door. I stopped, almost losing my breath. I walked back into one corner of a barn and picked up an unfinished cradle. Baby Carter, was carved in the wood. I carried it outside the barn. The woman was right, we must have been expecting another child. Nick smiled and said there was plenty of room for children in this lifetime. He grabbed my hand and we walked out into the fields. We walked until we came to the church. It was so beautiful. It was an old country church house. Nick said let's get married here. I said what? He said I like it, you like it, we've been here before in marriage and in death. Why not? I smiled and said why not?

Chapter 21

Nick and I made love again that night. We couldn't get enough of each other. The day was very emotional. We had many answers to our questions. I wondered out loud if there was anyone alive from either of our families. Nick said there was only one way to find out. I said and what's that? He said we had passed the county court house several times today. Oh yes, I said. I remember. I sat up, Nick! He said what's wrong? I said nothing, but we can get a copy of their marriage certificate. Maybe we can find the Minister who married them. I was still struggling with the fact that they were us. Nick said if the Minister isn't alive maybe someone in the family is. I said they could marry us. Nick pulled me down to him and kissed me so passionately that his tears were running down his face. I asked him what was wrong? He said that was the first time I mentioned us getting married. I said well of course I want to marry you Nick, why would you think otherwise? He said he's been doing all the talking. He wasn't sure that I would want to be married to him again. What? Oh you mean because of the last time? I said Nick, that's no reason for me not to marry you. I will marry you because I love you. There isn't even the issue of forgiveness, it was an accident. Nick is a very sensitive person, I am learning that. Can he be anymore perfect? We cuddled until we fell asleep. Nick woke me up the next morning and he made love to me again. He said he just couldn't get enough of me. He had this hunger that he couldn't satisify unless he was with me. I knew EXACTLY what he meant. Nick again asked if I wanted my daughter to join us? I said well she has school and I'm supposed to be home today. Nick now looked very hurt, you have to leave? Yes, I have a job and a child and a house to take care of. Nick blurted, quit your job. I can't quit my job Nick, how will I support myself and my daughter? Nick said we're getting married, you won't have to work anymore. Although it sounded very appealing, I still hesitated. Nick, we're not getting married for awhile. He stopped me there, no Cindy, I want to marry you now, today if we can. Nick we can't get married today. What about our families? You're right, but we need to get married soon, Nick said. Promise me you won't make me wait. I kissed him and started to unbotton his pants. Oooooh, I like this, he said. I let his pants drop to the floor and then I pushed him back on the bed. He removed his boxer briefs and lay waiting for me. I slowly removed each piece of my clothing and watched as he flexed his muscle. He was getting harder and harder by the moment. He was watching me slip off my pants and the phone rang. Without taking his eyes off me he lifted the receiver and hung it up again. I had to laugh. What if that was important. He said then they'd call back. The phone didn't ring again. He told me to come to him, he needed to feel my body against his. I lay beside him and he began to pleasure me. 2 hours later we found exited the shower and headed through the city one last time before returning to New Orleans. We stopped off at the court house and received a copy of the marriage certificate, birth certificates, and death certificates. We also liberated a Mississippi phone book from a pay phone. We had a lot of planning to do. I had to get home. Nick decided to come with me. He would meet the fellas in OTown to finish the tour on Friday. I was nervous about him coming with me but I didn't want to be apart from him anymore than he wanted to be apart from me.

Chapter 22

We arrived back in New Orleans just as the fellas were getting ready to leave. Nick talked with Kevin as I went up to the room to pack my things. A few minutes later Nick returned to the room. He had been crying I could tell but he told me it was nothing. I packed up my things and watched as Nick packed up his. Once we were in a taxi for the airport Nick told me he wouldn't be joining me just yet. I looked shocked, why not? I thought you were coming home with me? I cried. Nick couldn't hold back his tears anymore. He said he talked it over with the fellas and they have something really important that they have to do and I have to be there. I tried to be strong, I had to be strong for Nick. I told him that this was better. This way I could tell my family and friends what was happening. He said NO! Don't tell them until I'm there. I said I have to tell Megan. He said okay, tell your daughter but no one else. Well, I can't keep it from Ronda and Ashley either, they're my best friends, besides you don't know them very well, they'll kill me if I keep this from them. Nick laughed, he said can you atleast wait to tell your parents? I promised him I wouldn't tell them until he got there. When we arrived at the airport I noticed Kevin and AJ walking around inside the terminal. Where are you heading, I asked him? Atlanta, but it's only for 2 days, then I have to finish out the tour in Florida so it will be atleast a week before we see each other again. He looked down again. I said Nick, we've waited a whole lifetime to be together, we can wait one more week can't we? He smiled and kissed me, you're always so positive. I smiled and said I surround myself with positive energy. We checked in and headed up to the gates. Nick's flight would leave 30 minutes after mine. We walked around and met up with the fellas. They are unique to say the least. AJ, I don't need to go there. Brian is very soft spoken and very sweet. Kevin is soft spoken too. He's very attentive and very protective. He apologized to me about Nick not being able to go with me after all. Nick said gee thanks dad! We all laughed. Kevin said he really is sorry, Cindy you are good for Nick. You really are. It's like you two have known each other for a long time. Nick and I just looked at each other and Nick tightened his grip on my hand. Howie was such a gentleman. He offered to buy me a drink, Coke please I said. He disappeared and brought me a Coke. They were just like brothers. Nick and I walked away I hugged the guys goodbye and thanked Howie for the Coke again. My flight was boarding and it was almost time for me to go. Nick was looking like he was about to cry. I told him I loved him and it would only be another week. He said it felt like forever. Then he smiled. You'll be all right I said. Just then we heard final boarding for my flight. I kissed him again. Nick wouldn't let go. Nick they are going to close the door. He said he'd miss me and it would be another week before he could hold me again. He told me I smelled good and he wanted to remember my smell. I took off my scarf and handed it to him. He said what's the perfume? I said I don't wear perfume, body spray. Avon. He laughed and I left. I was in tears by the time I sat in my seat.

Chapter 23

I took the taxi back to my home. I started my laundry and not twenty minutes later my phone rang. It was Nick. He missed me. I miss you too honey. Nick said he had a free day and he wanted to come to Alabama to meet my friends and family. When are you coming? I asked him. Wednesday night. Two days I said excitedly? Yes, baby, two short days. Can you pick me up or do you want me to catch a cab? No, I don't want you to catch a cab, I'll pick you up. How long can you stay? I asked. He had to go back Friday morning. One whole day. I left and picked up Megan from my parents. She had missed me this time. She wanted to go home. I thanked my parents and we drove home. Megan was really quiet so I asked her what was wrong? She said there was a father daughter dance at school on Thursday and she didn't have a daddy. Her emotions let loose I had to pull over. She was sobbing so much that I was crying too. I promised I would take care of everything. She kept crying. I took off towards home. She had calmed down by that time but she was still very depressed about the whole situation. She wanted to go and play with friends. Megan, can you sit down a minute, I asked. I really need to talk to you and it's very important. She looked at me and sat. I showed her my ring and she thought it was very pretty. I said Megan, I'm getting married. Her tears were forming again. I asked her why she was sad? She asked what would happen to her? I tried to hold back my tears. I said Megan, this means you'll have a daddy. She threw her arms around my neck so fast I fell back on the chair. She was crying but now they were happy tears. She had lots of questions for me, who was he? Would we be married by Thursday? I told her to sit. I told her it was Nick from the Backstreet Boys. She thought I was joking. I said Megan, I have never lied to you and I never will. She smiled and told me I'd have to take my posters down now. I laughed. For 7 she was very smart. Just like her mama! I told her Nick would be flying in on Wednesday night and he was really excited to be your daddy. She smiled, really? He said that? He wants to be "my" daddy? I told her he said it himself. I asked her to please not talk about it. We have to keep it a secret for awhile. Aww Mom, why'd you tell me then? She asked. You nearly broke my heart in the car. All I can do is apologize that things didn't work out for your daddy and me, but I love you and I'd do anything to make you happy. She told me she loved me too. She hugged me and ran outside to play. Megan, please remember what I said. She said she would. I called Nick and told him I'd told Megan. She was excited as he was. He said he couldn't wait to see us again. We hung up and Megan and I sat down to dinner together. She talked and talked she was excited about everything. It was amazing. She took a bath and wore her BSB nightshirt to bed. She kept calling me into her room. She wanted it to be Thursday. She asked me if I thought Nick would take her to the father daughter dance? I said he already said he would. I shouldn't have told her that. It took her two hours to fall asleep. I kept going in her room and finding her picking out a dress to wear. Finally I black mailed her. I'll buy you a new dress tomorrow if you will just go to bed. She finally did. It was great seeing her so happy. Not that she's an unhappy child, but I can see in her eyes when her best friends dad does thing with or for his daughter. She longs for that. Now I can finally give that to her.

Chapter 24

I dropped Meg off at school the next morning. She was tired, poor kid. She promised to keep Nick a secret. I told her she could tell people that I was getting married, but not to mention his name. I headed to work and Ronda was on cloud nine. She had two dozen red roses on her desk from Kevin. They were both glad to see me. I had also received two dozen red roses from Nick. It must have been a team thing. I laughed. Nick's card read, until tomorrow. Love, Nick

It brought a smile to my face to know that he was thinking of me as much as I was thinking of him. Nick called me around 11:30 a.m. and I thanked him for the roses. He said he'd gladly send me roses everyday if it would make me happy. I told him he made me happy and I didn't need roses. He said he missed me and loved me. I talked to him about the father daughter dance and Megan. I told him I would understand if he didn't want to go. He said well what should I wear? Is it formal or casual? I laughed, you can leave your tux at home. She's only in second grade. He laughed. His flight lands at 4:30 p.m. I promised to be there. He told me he'd call me later. Ashley and Ronda walked in my office just as I hung up the phone. I said I'm glad you two are here, please close the door and have a seat. They both looked at each other. Why so serious Cindy? Did we do something wrong? Ronda asked. I looked up at her and said not that I know of, is there something you'd like to confess? She looked at Ashley and said so how was your trip? They each took a seat and I said it was very productive as I held out my left hand. They screamed! What? who? Cindy!!! I laughed, I said you have to come to my house tonight so I can explain everything. It would take too much time to do it here and I'm very busy. I'm taking Thursday and Friday off. Ronda said is it Nick? Ashley said yeah right. I said yes, it's Nick. Ashley went really pale. I said but be at my house around 6:30 I'll order pizza and we'll discuss it then. They both hugged and congratulated me. I asked them both to keep the information to themselves for the mean time. They both promised and I knew I could trust them. The rest of the day flew by fast. Megan would stay after in the kids play center until I could get there. I had to pick her up by six though. I left at the last possible minute and Megan was waiting for me. Hi Mom, how was your day? she asked. Fine how was yours I asked her? Surprised by her question. She said fantastic. Is Nick still coming tomorrow? I said he is. She said do you think he'd mind if I call him Daddy? I held her hand and said I'm sure he wouldn't mind at all sweetie. She smiled and then she talked all the way home. About her friend this and that and he said, she said. We finally pulled into my driveway and I told her I was going to order pizza. Ronda and Ash are coming over tonight. She said do they know? I said of course they do. I called and ordered pizza and Cokes. 30 minutes or it's free. I took a quick shower and waited for the pizza and Ronda and Ashley to arrive.

Chapter 25

The pizza and the girls arrived at the same time. I checked my watch and told the driver he was lucky. 2 more minutes and the pizzas would have been free. I was joking but he thought I was serious. We sat down and ate pizza as I filled everyone in on my trip back to New Orleans. I put Megan in the tub and filled Ronda and Ashley in on being hypnotized again with Nick. What we had learned and where we had been. Once every thing was out in the open no one spoke. I finally said, well aren't yall gonna say somethin'? Ronda finally said the story was better than any movie she's ever seen. They both didn't know what to say. Even I didn't know what to say. I helped Megan finish her bath and she kissed us all good night. After last night she was exhausted. She was excited for tomorrow. I didn't have time to take her to get her dress and for once she didn't mind. She said that's okay, we'll go tomorrow. We said our prayers and I told her I loved her. I turned to go and she called me back. Mom? What Megan? She said thanks for being my Mom. She held out her arms signaling me to hug her. I love you baby, I said. I love you to Mom, she said. I joined the girls back in the living room and they stopped talking as soon as I sat down. What? I asked. Ronda said nothing. Did you drink all the Coke again? I asked trying to lighten the mood. They were just weirded out. This is so unbelievable Cindy. What if this is some sort of cruel joke? Ashley asked. I said how can my dreams and what I saw in Mississippi be a hoax? Nick had the "same" dream. He knew everything. It's still weird she said. I never said it wasn't. Ronda looked from me to Ashley and asked who my bridesmaids were going to be? I smiled and said well you and Ashley of course. Just like last time. Don't say that Ronda said getting chills all up and down her spine. I said it's true. We were all sisters in a past lifetime. I said I want Megan to stand up for me. I think she deserves it after putting up with me for the last seven years. They both nodded in agreement. I let that pass. We talked about what I would wear and the location. It got to be so late I was falling asleep. The telephone rang, it was Nick. I sat on my couch while Nick talked to me, but I felt really awkward sitting there while Ronda and Ashley listened in on my conversation. I asked Nick to hold on. I'm gonna be awhile I said, snapping them out of their trance. Oh yeah, well it's getting late Ronda said. Ashley take me home. Ashley and Ronda left and I took the cordless into my bedroom and talked to Nick in the pitch blackness of my room. I could tell he was tired. He said he couldn't wait until tomorrow. He asked what time I leave in the morning to take Megan to school? I said 7:30, why? He said he had something being delivered for her. I smiled, I miss you Nick. Nick said he missed me too. He'd see me tomorrow.

Chapter 26

Just as we were heading out the door the next morning a deliveryman knocked on the door. I answered the door to see a man with a huge bouquet of flowers and balloons. He asked for Megan. I called her to the door and her eyes were huge. What is that? she asked in disbelief. The man needs you to sign your name honey. Me? she said again not believing this. She took the clip board and as neatly as she could she printed her name. The man then handed her the bouquet. I asked him to hold on for a tip but he said it had already been taken care off and wished us both a great day. Megan had never gotten anything like this before and was utterly speechless. I made a mental note to remember that. She opened the card and read it aloud.

Megan,

I hope you like balloons. I am so excited to see you again and I'm looking forward to our father daughter dance tomorrow. I'll see you tonight.

Love,

Nick

I took Megan to school and went to work. I couldn't concentrate on getting anything done. Nick called around 12 to say he loved me. That just made it all worse. I told him how excited Megan was to receive her flowers and balloons. She can't wait until you arrive Nick, and neither can I. He said he was counting the minutes. I left early and took Megan out to the mall so she could pick out a new dress for the father daughter thing tomorrow. I was so nervous for the both of them. Megan picked out a beautiful green dress. She wanted green because she knew it was Nick's favorite color. We went out to lunch and then home to straighten up the house. I took my posters off my wall. I put them away in the back of my closet. Megan was driving me crazy asking me if it was time to leave. I'm having a tough enough time controling myself from looking at my watch. I didn't need her asking too. Ronda and Ashley called from work and asked if I was leaving soon. I nearly fell out laughing. I guess I wasn't the only one eager to see Nick. Finally it was time to go. Megan and I hopped into my car and headed out to the airport. I kept asking Megan if I looked all right? She already thinks I'm nuts so this didn't help things out any. We found a parking spot in short term parking. Just as I was about to turn the car off I heard this song come on. It was the most beautiful song I've heard in a long time. By the end of the song I was a mess. Megan sat back and watched me. It's a nice song Mom, can we go now? I told her it was perfect, just perfect. I started writing down a part that meant the most to me. Maybe we can incorporate this into the wedding I said to myself.

I've loved you forever,

In lifetimes before

And I promise you never,

Will you hurt anymore

I give you my word

I give you my heart

This is a battle we've won

And with this vow,

Forever has now begun...

It was weird. I've loved you forever, In lifetimes before. Was this a coincidence or was this fate? Megan and I rushed inside to meet Nick's plane. It had already landed and I got stuck going through the security check point. I was in tears as I ran up to the gate. Mom, the airplane is not here yet. Wipe your face already Mom. I looked around and dragged Megan into the ladies room. My makeup had run. Damn, I fixed it the best I could in under two minutes. When we walked up I could see the plane was parked at the gate. I grabbed Megan and rushed over to see if Nick had deplaned. No one had. The jetway was being put up to the airplane. I took a few deep breaths and tried to relax. Nick came off the aircraft and Megan was gone. She literally ran and jumped into Nick's arms. She was so excited to finally have a dad and Nick was just as happy to have her. I looked around and noticed the people smiling at the two of them. As I watched the two of them talk. Megan thanked Nick for the flowers and balloons. He put her down and she never let go of him. He walked up to me and said Hi. I just stared into those ocean blue eyes and waited for it. He leaned in and kissed me, nearly taking the air from my lungs. I missed you I finally said. Megan said, let's go home.

Chapter 27

Megan wouldn't let me get a word in edge wise so I let her talk. I drove us home and Nick rested his hand on my thigh. I turned the radio off so that Nick could hear Megan. I looked over at him a few times and caught him smiling at me. He would mouth "I love you" to me. I nearly rear ended a car once because of his intense stare. We got back to my, Nick thought I lived on a very nice street. Megan was eager to introduce him to her friends. Mom wouldn't let me tell anyone who you were, she complained. Nick just laughed, he said why don't we just spend tonight together as a family? Her face brightened up. A family night? she asked. I helped Nick with his bags and they followed me into the house. I had Megan put Nicks bags in my bedroom and Nick pulled me close to him. C'mere beautiful he said. Then he kissed me. I needed him, I wanted him so badly it brought tears to my eyes. Megan came out and said she hoped Nick liked sleeping on a waterbed. He laughed, then Megan said, Mom what happened to your posters? I could have killed her. Nick asked what posters. I quickly said nothing, Megan go wash up. She smiled at me knowing what she'd done. What posters he pressed? I said I'm hungry, you hungry? He laughed and said let's go out and celebrate being a family. Where should we go? Megan yelled McDonald's! Nick and I both said no, Nick said he wanted to go to a nice restaurant. Somewhere where they could practice their dancing for tomorrow. That made her smile. We settled on "Antonio's." It was a great Italian restaurant with a dance floor. Besides, Megan loves spaghetti and I knew she would eat. We got cleaned up and dressed. It was weird getting ready with a man in the house. Nick promised to take care of me tonight. I didn't even ask what that meant. I just knew that I would enjoy it. He left me and went to help Megan with something. She was playing a game on my computer. Nick said we'd have to get her some more games. She knew the other ones. It was hard to provide her with a lot of extras on a single person's salary. I have a hard enough time providing for her basic needs. Nick said I would never have to worry about that again. We left for the restaurant and we had the best time. Nick and Megan danced after dinner. He told me he would make all this up to me later. I said make up what? He said he felt quitly for showering so much attention on Megan and not enough on me. I said just you being here with us was enough attention. He held my hand and turned his attention back to Megan. She was drinking Shirley Temples like they there the newest craze. Nick drove us home. Megan fell asleep in the back seat. I started to lift her out of the car, but Nick wanted to do it. He carried her so delicately. Megan was semiconsious and asked Nick if she could call him daddy? He said you can call me anything you want. I unlocked the door, unable to see through the tears in my eyes. Nick put Megan into bed and covered her up. She talked him into reading her a story. He never got past the first page. She was sound asleep.

Chapter 28

I had hopped into the shower while he was reading to her. I stepped out of the shower and walked into my bedroom. Nick was lying nude on my bed. He had a huge smile on his face. I said what? He was laughing as he asked me. Are you ready to make a few waves? He finally asked. I stepped out of my nightshirt and said, only a few? I straddled him and he inserted himself inside me. I don't know who was having a tougher time controling themself me or Nick. Finally I started to get lost in the feeling and Nick brought his hands up to my breasts. My nipples were getting hard in his hands and he enjoyed it. I leaned over so that he could bring them to his lips. He circled my nipples with his tongue and then softly sucked on them. He rolled me over onto my back and stuck his fingers deep inside me. I arched my back enjoying every minute. He continued to suck on my nipples. He withdrew his fingers and then mounted me. I was so close to climaxing that I was ready to beg. I didn't have too. Within seconds he brought me to an orgasm. He had my hands stretched up over my head with our fingers intertwined. He was kissing me and thrusting his hips bringing his manhood deeper and deeper with each thrust. He finally climaxed. He rolled over next to me and I lay my head on his shoulder. He kissed the top of my head and told me he loved me. I fell asleep in his arms waking as my alarm went off at 6. I forgot to turn it off. I let Nick sleep as I showered off and got dressed. I woke Megan up at 6:30 and she immediately ran into my bedroom. Jumping on the bed waking Nick up. At first I think he was startled, then nervous because he wasn't wearing anything. He was covered up though. Megan wanted him to eat breakfast with her. Nick said, um, okay, why don't you...um, Cindy? I walked into the bedroom and saw the look on Nick's face. Yes, honey I said, with a smile on my face? He said Megan would like me to have breakfast with her this morning. I said oh really? Megan, let Nick wake up first. Go get dressed for school. She kissed Nick and then she was off. Nick called me over to him. He said help me a minute. I walked over wondering if maybe Megan had hurt him. He pulled me down on the bed and told me if I ever let him squirm like that again, he'd make me squirm. Then he got out of bed and struted his naked body into the bathroom. I helped Megan get ready and Nick was in the living room reading the newspaper. I headed into the kitchen and made pancakes. Nick apologized, the one thing he doesn't do it cook he said. I said he was skilled in other areas and that was just fine by me. He smiled, Megan had no clue. She was talking to Nick about everyone in her class. Nick was listening to her every word. He reached over and held my hand as he listened to her. Megan, you need to hurry up I have to get you to school. Go brush your teeth, I told her. She placed her plate in the kitchen and skipped off to her bedroom. Nick kissed me and said he'd take Megan to school. I said you don't know where it is. He said Megan could show him. I said okay. Nick went to brush his teeth and then he came back with Megan on his back. Kiss your Mom sweet pea. Megan leaned down and kissed me. Then Nick kissed me. Megan said Mom, I'm going to be late. Like she cared. I followed them out to the driveway and watched them take off down the street. I went back inside and cleaned up the breakfast dishes and then I laid on the couch reading the paper. I fell asleep. Nick was sitting in the chair reading the sports page when I woke up. I sat up and apologized. He said not to worry. He was fine. We don't have much time to spend together and... He said we have the rest of our lives.

Chapter 29

Nick got dressed and drove back to Megan's school for the father daughter dance. When they came home Megan could not stop smiling. She was very happy. Nick said he had a great time. I sent Megan to her room to take off her dress. She insisted on taking pictures first. I can't believe I didn't think of that first. I took a few pictures and she skipped off to her room. Nick pulled me to him close and told me she was a great kid. She had him laughing. Once her friends realized who her "date" was they wouldn't leave us alone. She became so serious and told them all to back up. I never laughed so hard, he said. She was protecting me, and I'm supposed to be the daddy. Nick kissed me and went to change. I called my mother and told her we'd be there for dinner, but I was bringing a guest. She said no problem, she figured it was Ronda or Ashley. About an hour later we headed to my parents house. I was so nervous I don't know why. Maybe because things were happening so fast. We pulled into my parent's driveway and I got really scared. Nick sent Megan inside and he told me that from now on I'd never be alone. This I promise you, he said. Then my eyes went wide. Nick, oh my goodness. Nick was startled. What did I say, he asked? I fished in my purse and read him the lyrics I'd written down yesterday. He read them and said wow, did you write this? I said no, but I want it to be part of our wedding. There is this whole song. He smiled and he said, don't you think I should meet your parents, afterall they are standing in the doorway. I turned towards the house and said well, I guess I'm as ready as I'm ever going to be. I kissed my Mom and dad and introduced Nick to them both. My Mom shot me one of her looks. (Like why didn't you tell me it was a man, I would have fixed my hair) We sat down in the living room and I again introduced Nick. Nick stopped me though. He said to them, I love your daughter with all of my heart, and I want to marry her again, I mean, I want to marry her. He was squeezing my hand so tight I had to pull it out. He was embarrassed. My Mom and dad looked at each other and then smiled. I said I already got the ring ya'll. I held up my hand and they said it was very nice. Nick looked so nervous I finally said, we're getting married that's what we came here to tell you. Megan flew through the door with another one of her little friends and introduced Nick as her daddy. The little girl was near tears, poor thing. Nick said hello and Megan sat on Nick's lap. The little girl was afraid to go near Nick. Nick noticed that the girl was clutching something in her hands and asked what it was she had. The poor girl just thrust it at Nick. I had to laugh. It was a picture of Nick. The edges were bent where she was holding it really tight. I reached into my purse and handed Nick a sharpie. Why it was in my purse, I don't know. He signed her picture and gave her a hug. I looked back at my Mom and dad and they had tears in their eyes. After Meg's friend left Mom asked me to help her in the kitchen. Which usually meant I'd sit at the table and listen to her talk. She ran a tight ship and didn't need anyone's help.

Chapter 30

I took my usual seat at the kitchen table. She did let me set the table and she was trying to hold back her tears. She said he's nothing like, well you know. I said no Mom he isn't. She said Megan really likes him too, doesn't she? I said Mom Megan loves him, and he loves her. He loves you too, she said. I know Mom that's why we want your blessing. Dad's too, but I can tell you right now we're getting married with or without it. She smiled and said if I was sure, then she would give us her blessing. Now it was my turn to cry. She asked what I was planning to do for a wedding? I filled her in on the all the details, well no all of them. I told her we found a beautiful church in Mississippi. Mississippi? she asked. But your family is here, your friends are here. What's in Mississippi? She was so confused. I told her that Mississippi held a special meaning for Nick and I and that's all I wanted to say about it. Nick's family is in California and they are going to fly out, so you can fly into Mississippi. And who is going to pay for that she said? Nick said he would. He walked into the kitchen and suprised us both. I smiled at him and he sat down with me. My Mom apologized, she didn't understand why we had to go so far away. I said wait until you see the place Mom. Then you'll know why. Nick said he'd charter an airplane if he had too. Mom was now embarrassed, you don't have to do that Nick. We can drive. No, I want to. This way you will all arrive at the same time. I'll make all the arrangements. Megan had a few of her friends in the back yard running around. They kept calling for Nick. Mom called Meg inside and we sat down to dinner. We had 1/2 the block outside the house now looking for Nick. I had to laugh. After dinner Nick went out and signed some autographs and then he called to me. I walked to the doorway and said what? He said come outside we're going to play kickball and I need you on my team. Once I stopped laughing I told him no. He gave me that puppy dog look and said, that's the first time you said no to me. Again I laughed. I went and played kickball. It was fun, but Nick is very competitive. Even Mom and dad were sitting outside watching us. Dad was happy to see me so happy again. Megan was getting tired and it was getting late. Nick posed for some pics and then we left for home. Nick carried in Meg to her bed. The telephone was ringing. Ronda had been trying to reach us for hours. I'm sorry I said, we went to my moms for dinner. She said well I have dessert, Ashley and I are coming over. Okay I'll warn Nick I said. She laughed and said I'd better. Nick came out and said finally alone. I just laughed. What's so funny? Ronda and Ashley are on their way over I said. He dropped his head. Go take a shower, I won't let them stay long. He kissed me and asked me to come with him. I can't, they'll be here any minute. He said once you miss it, you'll never have the opportunity to get it back. Go take you shower I said. But hurry, I kissed him and he left. He was just stepping out of the shower when I heard Ronda and Ashley at my door. I let them in. Ronda said the dessert is here. She handed me two Strawberry Shortcakes. They are huge I said. She said one we'll eat now and the other you can save for later. Then she sat down. Where is Nick she asked? He'll be out in a minute he's taking a shower. Oooooh girl, and your out here with us? We both laughed. Ashley asked how things were going? I said they couldn't be better. I was telling them about Nick and Megan's day when Nick came out. Hair all slicked back and he was smelling so good. He smiled at me and said hello to the girls. I said look they brougth Strawberry Short Cakes. Nick said why two? I said Ronda brought us one for later. He looked confused, I said that's okay honey, I'll show you. Then he got all embarrassed. He hugged both girls and we sat down and talked about different things. It was almost midnight and Nick had to leave in the morning so after I cleard the dishes away, I told them to leave. Nick said, Cindy, that's rude. I said no it's not. Ronda and Ashley both gave me the evil eye. They have to be to work tomorrow early, and you have an airplane to catch. I looked at them both again and told them to get out of my house. Nick was laughing now. They know I love 'em but I want to go to bed. That did it, now Ronda and Ashley were really ribbing me, oh you want to go to "bed." Why didn't you say that to begin with? I pulled Nick into the bedroom and told them not to let the door hit them on the way out. Nick walked them out to the car the gentleman that he is. He told me to the shortcake ready. I headed for the shower.

Nick was just getting undressed when I walked naked out of the bathroom in a cloud of steam. I told Nick to lie on the bed. He didn't say a word he did as he was told. I straddled him and fed him a strawberry with whipped cream. He went to bite it but I said, uh uh. I rubbed the strawberry over his lips leaving the whipped cream there. With my tongue I licked it off. I took the strawberry and dipped it in more whipped cream and rubbed it over his dick. Taking him completely into my mouth and devouring the whipped cream at the same time. I consumed that strawberry. I took more whipped cream and spread it across his chest sucking the cream from his nipples. He enjoyed that. He rolled me off of him and then he kissed me deeply. Stirring juices throughout me. He too the strawberry glaze and covered my breasts in it. Then he seductively licked the glaze off. Sucking ever so gently on my nipples. He spread the glaze over my stomach and licked that off. His face disappeared between my legs and he made me cry out. He sat up and stuck his big thick penis deep inside me. Just the feel of him made my climax. Nick then thrusted his hips causing my climax to double. Then he himself fell on top of me having climaxed himself. We stripped my bed and headed for the shower. He washed my body and I washed his. He kissed my neck and carried me back to be. We were soaking wet lying on a water bed. I grabbed for the comforter and we fell asleep that way. Our naked bodies pressed together.

Chapter 31

Somewhere in the middle of the night Nick woke up and came to me. I was dead asleep. Nick is so hard and can barely control himself. He made love to me and we got so carried away we fell out of my waterbed. Nick was concerned that he'd hurt me and I was laughing so hard because that had never happened to me before. Before he knew it, he was caught up in the laughter too. The next morning was a sad one. We took Megan to school. The poor kid was so upset than Nick was leaving. He promised Megan that before too long he'd be here for good. I love you daddy she said. Nick held her tight and I could see the tears in his eyes too. He loved her too. I wondered if there was some connection between Meg and him that we didn't see. Could she possibly feel deep down inside that he was once her father? She was so emotional. It tore me up inside but I wanted to be alone with Nick and I told him I'd check on her after he left. If she was still upset I'd take her home with me. She finally went into her class but she put her little head down and cried some more. Nick and I left and now it was my turn to cry. Nick held my hand and promised he'd be back. I walked him into the terminal and he got checked in. We headed up to the gate. They were already boarding his flight. I hugged him and kissed him. I didn't want him to go. I was crying so hard I couldn't see straight. Finally it was last call. He handed his ticket to the agent at the door and he was given his boarding stub. He looked back at me and said he loved me. I nodded my head with my eyes closed. Why does it hurt so much? He walked back towards me and hugged me again. I'll call you tonight, I promise. Then he disappeared down the jetway. The agent was crying too. She had been watching us the whole time. I walked to the window and I could see Nick get on the airplane. He glanced up and saw me and waved again. Then I saw the jetway separate from the airplane. I was crying so much I didn't notice Nick get off the airplane. I started walking towards the entrance when I heard my name. I turned to see Nick coming through the door. He ran to me and said let's go get Megan and you two come with me. I can't be apart from the two of you another minute. I just hugged him. I love you babe he said. I don't want to spend another day apart from you. We went and picked up Megan. She was still crying but when Nick walked in to get her she was hysterical. She couldn't believe he came back. He said he loved her and wanted her to come to Florida with him for a few days. Her eyes got huge, can we go to Disneyworld, she asked? He said whatever your heart desires. He looked at me and said, that goes for you too. We left the school and headed home. Megan and I packed a bag. It was tough because we didn't have much time. We had three hours until the last flight to Tampa leaves. Nick has to be on that one. Nick said whatever you forget we'll buy. I called Ronda, and my Mom and told them both that I was going to Florida for a few days. Ronda was crying, she thought I wasn't coming back. I asked her to please keep an eye on my house. I'm leaving a key under the mat for you. She told me she'd miss me. She said to tell Kevin she still thinks about him. I promised her I would. Mom asked if I needed her to keep Megan? No, Mom, she's coming with us. You're pulling her out of school? I said Mom, we're a family now. Wherever I go she goes. She said your the mother. I said you raised me right. Trust me on this. She told me she loved me and wanted me to call her later. I promised her I would. We parked my car in my garage and Nick called a Limousine which made Meg's day! We headed out to the airport. The same gate agent was working the flight to Tampa. She recognized us and was glad to see us all traveling together this time. She said I had to take a break after you two left earlier. I laughed and we boarded the flight to Tampa.

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We all flew first class. It was Megan's first time on an airplane so she sat with Nick. The two of them were mirror images of each other. Both were easily excited over the smallest things. We landed in Tampa and we followed Nick to his Durango. We loaded up the back of the car and headed to Nick's home. Megan was excited and wanted to know when we'd go to Disneyworld? Nick promised that he'd take us personally. He had a few things he had to do first. Maybe Saturday he said. She was content with that and sat back and looked out the window. I watched Nick manuever the streets until we finally found our way into a private gated community. We pulled into the driveway of a huge house that made mine look like a dollhouse. Even Megan was excited. Nick pulled into the garage and helped us carry in our bags. Nick told Megan she could stay in Aaron's room while he was away. I thought she was going to cry. We followed Nick up the stairs. His house was so clean. It was really nice. We stopped mid way down the hall and Nick opened the door. He looked at Megan and said this will be your room. She walked inside and dropped her backpack. Just ecstatic to be there. Nick said we're just down the hall okay. She didn't even look at us. She was checking out all of Aaron's things. She just said uh huh, okay. Nick and I both laughed. Nick said you come with me. I picked up a suitcase and followed Nick down to his bedroom. He opened the double door and I swear it was something right out of a movie. A large king sized bed was right in front of me. To the left of that was a balcony which over looked a private canal. To the left of those doors was a sitting area and a vanity area and then the bathroom. The carpet was a soft carmel color. Almost the color of beach sand. He had a large bookcase to the right of the bed which held books, comic books and video games. To the right of the double doors was the largest walk in closet I've ever seen. It was bigger than my bathroom back home. Nick told me I could put my bad down now. I closed my mouth and said his home was beautiful. He pulled me close and said, it's our home. Okay? I looked at him and smiled. Does that mean I get to drive the Prowler that's downstairs? He laughed and said he doesn't even drive that car. He asked if I had any reservations about moving to Florida? I told him I hadn't even thought about it. He said he wanted to fix up the house in Mississippi. Why do you want to do that? I asked him. He said mostly because it was a tie to our pasts. He'd like to take time off and go back there. He wanted to tare down the barn and rebuild one that would hold horses. I said it wouldn't bother me. He pulled me down on to the bed and kissed me. We both lay back on the bed and I noticed he had a mirror above his bed. What the heck is that I asked? He busted up laughing and said what do you think it is? I said I know what it is but why ... oh nevermind. He said if I didn't like it we could take it down. Then he went back to talking about the house in Mississippi. He said he wants to marry me in the worst way, but he was thinking that he'd like the house restored so that we could hold our reception there. Nick that's going to take a long time. I said. He turned on his side and propped his head up on his hand. He said how long will it take for you to find a dress? I don't know I said. He said how long will it take for you to find dresses for Ronda and Ashley? I don't know, I said. He said would you think maybe a couple months? Probably, why what are you getting at Nick? He sat up and brought me something from his suitcase. We didn't have much time for this in Alabama. But after we left Mississippi I called a contractor and bought the old Carter place, as it is referred to. Well, we bought it, it's in both our names. Anyway, I had someone look at it and we got the old plans from city hall and he says he can restore it by the beginning of July. Nick, why didn't you tell me? I wanted it to be a suprise he said. He laid out all the plans and we looked at them. He said all the plumbing would be replaced. We just needed to pick out paint and carpet and they'd do the rest. I felt the tears running over. What? he asked as he wiped them away? I just hugged him, what could I say?

Chapter 33

Megan was standing in the hallway calling for us. Nick kissed me quickly and opened the door to his room and invited her in. I'm hungry, she said. Nick laughed and said so am I let's go find something to eat. The three of us walked back up the hallway to the staircase that would take us downstairs. We walked through the entry way and down another hallway to the kitchen. The kitchen was huge. It had an island in the center. On one side it had four stools the other side had a sink. Nick walked over to the his refrigerator and looked inside. Hmmmmm, he said. I don't see anything. Megan scooted under his arm and said there isn't anything in here! Nick laughed. He said lets order pizza. We can go shopping tomorrow. Nick called and ordered pizza and then he went and took a shower. Megan went outside and was wondering around the property. I went up to suprise Nick. I opened the door to the bathroom and was suprised at the size of it. Nick was standing in an all glass shower. I could see directly inside the shower. He saw me and smiled. Are you coming in? he asked. I climbed out of my clothers and joined him in the shower. The water soaked my hair and Nick's hands cupped my breasts. He brought his mouth down hard on mine. I can't get enough of you, he whispered. He began to get hard again. I couldn't help it either, I needed him just as much. We finished our shower and got dressed. Nick had to go out for a few hours but he showed Meg and I around the house and had Pizza with us and then he was gone. I didn't know what to do? I felt like an intruder in someone elses house. It was getting late so I told Megan to take her shower and get ready for bed. She took about 30 minutes and we read a book she brought with her and then we said our prayers and she went to sleep in Aarons bed. She told me to smell the pillow. It smells like Aaron. I had to laugh, but she was right. I kissed her and I went and got ready for bed myself. I was really tired, it had been an emotional day. The phone kept ringing but I let the answering machine get it. I fell asleep at quarter to 11. Somewhere around 1 I heard someone running up the stairs. I sat up in bed clutching the green comforter under my chin. The door flew open and I saw a silhoutte of a man. Then I heard my name, Cindy? Nick? I said. Nick turned on the light and said he was worried all night about me. Why I asked? He said you wouldn't answer the phone. I apologized, no one knows I'm here so why bother explaining who I am and what I'm doing answering your telephone. He looked confused and then shook his head and asked if I missed him. I threw back the covers and allowed him to view my naked body. The light went off and then he closed and locked the door. I heard his zipper come undone and then the sound of him removing his clothing.

Chapter 34

The next moring Nick took us grocery shopping. We even found those 20oz Coke bottles I like so much. Nick didn't understand but Megan explained, sort of, that I had a moment back home. I just hushed her and asked where next? Nick said dairy aisle. We steered the buggy to the milk aisle. I picked out milk, butter, and eggs. Nick grabbed a can of whipped cream. I looked at him funny. What's that for I asked? He said you know what it's for. He threw it in the cart and said hold on, and then he grabbed three more cans. I have never laughed so hard! We bought lots of snacks and other stuff. Nick wanted me to be very relaxed at our home. He said Monday we'll see about getting Megan registered for school and then a tutor. Why do I need both, she asked? It's for when we are on the road, you'll need to keep up your studies. She looked confused but then so did I. Can we discuss this later we need to get out of here. Nick is such a kid. We were all over the store he bought so much stuff I was sure we had spent 500.00 on groceries. I was not too far off the mark, 312.00. We loaded up the Durango and headed for "home." I didn't feel like home but over time I was hoping it would. We put everything away and Nick showed me where everything was. I asked to use the phone. He said I didn't have to ask, this was my house too now. I said but it's long distance. He said he didn't care if I wanted to call the moon. I picked up and dialed my Mom. Nick gave me some privacy and I sat on the stool at the island in the kitchen. Hi Mom I said. She said hello and asked how we were? I said Megan's doing really great but I'm not so sure I'm making the right decision. Well, it's a little late for that now isn't it? she said. I love him Mom, he's good to me and Megan. I'm just afraid ... you know, the what ifs? She said what if Nick didn't come into your life at all? What if you never went to New Orleans? Would you be any worse off now that then? No, but if it was just me I wouldn't have these reservations, but there's Meg to consider. You'll be fine, she said. I have to quit my job Mom. Nick doesn't want me to work. You never liked working anyway, why does that bother you now? she asked me. I had to work before to be able to provide for Megan, if I quit and something happens then what do I do? Gee, I don't know Cindy, she said. I guess you'll just have to wait until your relationship fails. What? I asked her. You sound so sure that it's going to fail, my Mom said I should just pack my bags and come home now then. I understand I told her, I should just accept it right? I'm just scared, I love him so much Mom it hurts. Now I was crying. I felt Nick's hands on my shoulders. Mom I gotta go I cried. I hung up the phone and turned and hugged Nick. He promised me there was nothing to be afraid of. He love me and Megan and would never hurt us. He just got off the other line with his Mom and she's flying in tomorrow to meet me. Tomorrow? I was shocked. Nick said it's okay. We can do this. Are you with me? I had to smile, I'd go anywhere for you.

Chapter 25

Nick ordered in Chinese food for dinner. I helped Megan with her shower and Nick read her a story. He was stepping into the daddy role quite well. I finished up the dishes in the kitchen and put a few things away and called the girls to let them both know I was all right and that I would be quitting my job soon. They were happy and sad to see me go. What are we going to do for fun? Ronda asked. We'll still see each other. I promise, you guys are like my sisters. Ronda said I gave her the chills again. Ashley wanted to know how things were going? I said they are perfect, I can't believe where I am. We were all sobbing now. I hung up the phone and headed upstairs. The bedroom was dark but I could see a flickering light coming from the bathroom. Nick was in the tub, he had sprinkled rose petals in the water and he was waiting for me by candlelight. He opened his eyes when he heard me. Hi babe, I've been waiting for you. I stripped out of my clothes and got into the tub with him. I sat between his legs and he held me. He said I promise you this is the right thing. I don't doubt that Nick, I've been on my one for the last 7 years. I've never had to rely on anyone else. I've raised Meg myself. He said I did a great job but now it's time for me to relax.

Chapter 35

Nick helped me from the tub and we went to bed. We didn't even have sex. He knew that I wasn't feeling that great and so he just held me instead. We woke up the next morning and I was sick. Nerves I guess. His Mom was coming. I didn't know what to do. Nick said there wasn't anything to do. His Mom wasn't coming until tonight so he thought we'd all go to Disneyworld. I asked him if he minded terribly if I didn't go? I need to rest, I'm not feeling really good. He said maybe we'll just postpone it for another day. Megan was NOT happy. I sad I'd be fine. I just want to sleep. Please go and have fun. Nick kissed me and promised to call. He told me that if I didn't answer he'd come right home. I reminded him that I would be sleeping. He wrote down his cell phone number and said then you call me when you wake up. Nick told Megan to grab a jacket, it gets windy. She ran upstairs and Nick helped me into bed. Are you sure you're all right? he asked me. I'll be fine, I just think it's all the change. Nerves, I'm sure that's all it is. He kissed me again, and I promised to call him. Megan ran in and kissed me goodbye. She walked out with Nick and I heard them head down the stairs. A few minutes later I heard her run into my room. I turned to look at her and she said, I love you Mom! She hugged me and kissed me again and then she disappeared. I'm coming daddy I heard her yell. She made me smile. My life is perfect now. I fell asleep with a smile on my face. I slept for three hours. Without even moving. I called Nick and told him I felt a lot better. I'm fixing myself some lunch. He asked if I felt up to going out to dinner with his parents? I guess I do, but I don't have anything nice to wear. I just brought my jeans and stuff. He said we'd go casual, but next week we'd have to get Me and Megan some new clothes.

Is she close, I asked him? Right here on my shoulders. I laughed, I heard Nick say it's Mom. Hi mommy! Hi baby, how's your day I asked her? She's said she's having the best time. Nick bought her this and that, and next they're going to this place and that place. I was laughing. She said she loved me and she'd see me later. Nick said we wouldn't be much longer. I heard Megan protest. I love you Nick, thanks for taking such good care of Megan. He said he loved me too and I didn't have to thank him. After I hung up the phone I went downstairs to the kitchen. I was suprised to find someone there. I almost screamed. But then I saw Aaron. You must be Cindy, Jane asked? I am Cindy. I'm Jane Carter, Nick's Mom and this is Nick's brother Aaron. Aaron shook my hand and offered me a chair. I was just coming down to fix a sandwich I said. Jane said let me fix that for you dear. Where is Nick? I said he and my daughter went to Disneyworld. They'll be back in a couple of hours. She laughed and said Nick loves that place more than any child I know. She asked me if I was all right? I'm fine, just a lot on my mind I guess it's getting to me. She fixed me a Ham sandwhich and a bowl of soup. We sat down at the island and she asked me about myself. I told her about me and felt like I should have had a giant spot light on my face. I could feel the burn of the tears in my eyes. I finished my meal and cleaned up after myself. I started to leave when she asked me if I loved her son? I turned to her and told her more than life it self. I turned to walk away. I almost made it to the top of the stairs but I passed out. I woke up a few minutes later and I was back in my bed. Everything was blurry for a minute. I was disoriented.

Chapter 36

Jane was in the room asking me if I was all right? She wanted to know if I had a medical condition or something so she could help me. I'm fine I said and I tried to sit up but the room started spinning. She told me to lie still. She was putting cold compresses on my head. I heard a loud commotion in the hall. Nick rushed into the room and sat on the bed. What happend? Are you all right he said? I'm fine I tried to sit up again but I just couldn't. Nick was worried, Cindy we have to get you to the doctor. Jane said she all ready called and Dr. Weston was on his way. I'm fine, really just too much too soon. Jane left to give us some privacy and to wait for Dr. Weston. Nick kicked off his shoes and climbed under the covers with me. He said this can't be happening. Everything was fine when I left. He asked if I was keeping anything from him? Are you in pain? Nick asked. No Nick I'm not in pain, I'm not feverish. I'm telling you it's just too much too soon. I'm just overwelmed with changes. He said he'd feel better once Dr. Weston got here. I can't lose you again, he said. I didn't respond. Megan finally came in and said Mom! Aaron is here! She was so thrilled to meet him. They were going outside to explore together. She kissed me and asked if I was all right? I said I'm fine honey. She looked at Nick and said she's fine. No tears. Megan skipped out of the room and I heard her call for Aaron. I laughed, and for the first time I felt Nick relax. She's so funny Nick. He said what did she mean? I guess I get emotional when things are crazy. Jane came up and said Dr. Weston was here. Nick said well bring him in. Jane said it's a her. Dr. Weston rounded the corner and asked everyone to leave. Nick kissed my forehead and climbed out of bed. She sat on the edge of my bed and took all my vitals. Blood pressure was fine, heart rate and temperature were all within normal limits. She asked if I've been tired or feeling nauseated. Nope, nothing. I think it's just all the changes. I just moved to Florida two days ago, and I'm homesick I think. I miss my friends and family. She said well, it could be that, but just in case I want a urine test too. She asked if I thought I could stand? I could try I said. I sat up and felt a little dizzy but it wasn't too bad. She told me to take my time. I sat up with my feet dangling off the side of the bed. She asked me some of my past medical history. I told her about my pregnancies. But other than that I was totally healthy. She helped me stand and get my bearings. I made it to the bathroom and back. It felt good to release my bladder. I handed her the sample and sat down on the bed. She told me she'd take it right over to the lab. She also wanted a blood sample. I hate needles. She took the sample and promised to get back to me tomorrow. I thanked her and she left. A few minutes later Nick was in the room. I had started to change clothes for dinner. He said we canceled dinner. He thought we'd stay in. I'm fine Nick, we can go. He said too late, they had already ordered Pizza, a Carter family favorite. I smiled and he held me. I'm so scared Cindy, what it....I said shhhh, no what ifs. Everything is going to be fine.

Chapter 37

We spent the rest of the evening in the bedroom watching Nick's television and getting to know each other. Nick brought some food up but I wasn't really hungry. The dizziness has subsided quite a bit. Nick's Mom and brother were very friendly and I started to feel relaxed around them. We played an extremely long game of Monopoly. Nick is a very sore loser. He doesn't like to lose. Aaron beat us all, but mostly because Megan sold him the properties he needed to dominate the board. Nick finally had enough and said he was tired. I tried not to laugh. Jane said it's 11:30, where did the time go? I walked Megan back to her room and helped her get ready for bed and say her prayers. Nick followed with a story. She asked if I was all right? No tears, honey, I'm fine. Aaron came in to get a few things, he would be sleeping downstairs in the spare room. He didn't mind at all, he said he was happy to give up his room to his little neice. Megan smiled, Uncle Aaron! Wow! I kissed her good night and said good night to Aaron. He and Nick stayed and read a story to Megan. Nick came back 30 minutes later. He was smiling. Megan had talked Aaron into sleeping in the room with her. He had to go and get the air mattress for Aaron. I laughed. Nick took a shower and joined me in bed. He held me so close. Are you sure you're all right? He asked. I'm feeling so much better. It's just nerves. You'll see. Dr. Weston will confirm it tomorrow. Nick put his hand on my stomach and said, I'm kind of hoping that it's more. I suddenly stiffened up. The thought had never crossed my mind. Oh my, I said. Nick looked up at me, what's the matter? Um, nothing, hee hee. Nick put his head back down on my chest and I closed my eyes. I suddenly felt sick. I asked Nick to get me some water. He got up and I thought I would hyperventilate. How the heck was I supposed to sleep tonight? I can't be pregnant. I don't "feel" pregnant. Nick came back with a glass of water. He asked what I was thinking? Nothing, just a lot of changes, you know. He said we've never really talked about having children, I just assumed that you'd want more. I do, I do want more, but this is all happening so fast Nick. We're not even married. He took my glass of water out of my hand and put it on the night table. He took my hands in his and placed them over his heart. He asked if I felt his heart beating? I said yes. He said it beats for you. Anything you want, it's yours. If you don't want to have anymore children, well, then ... that's fine. Nick? I asked. Do you want children? He said yes, but he had me and Megan, that's all that really mattered to him. My tears were burning my eyes. I couldn't hold them back anymore. Nick, can we go to the store? Nick looked confused. What for, it's almost 1 a.m.? I said we need to get a pregnancy test. I can't wait until the morning, I'll never be able to sleep. He smiled and said do you really want me to go? I asked if he minded? He kissed me and said he'd be right back. He pretty much ran out of the room but then he ran back. He said Cindy? I looked up at him. I forgot to say "I love You." I love you too Nick. With that he was gone. I got up and took a bath. I was nervous and didn't know what to do with myself. I wondered if Nick had a computer. I wonder if Ronda and Ashley are online. I was just getting out of the tub when Nick walked in. Are you feeling better? he asked. I smiled and he hugged me. He said before you do this, I just want you to know that no matter what the outcome, it's okay. It's okay, he said. He gave me my privacy and I took the test. I read the instructions and reread the instructions. I'd know in 5 minutes. I kept telling myself, I didn't feel pregnant. I walked out into the bedroom and told Nick we had 5 minutes. He said come lay with me.

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We fell asleep, the 5 minutes turned into 7 hours. Nick woke up first. He said Cindy? Cindy? uh huh... He said what did the test say. My eyes popped open. Oh no, I fell asleep. I jumped out of bed and ran into the bathroom. I picked up the test and started bawling. Nick asked what was wrong? I said it was negative. He said it was okay. I couldn't stop crying. I said I know you want a child, I'm sorry. I... I... He pulled me close and said as long as your healthy and happy, I'm happy. I pulled out of his embrace and said I want to have your children Nick, I want you to know that. I mean it, from my heart. I want to have your children. I was pathetic. I couldn't stop crying. Nick was laughing. What's so funny, I asked him? He couldn't stop laughing. Hey, what's so funny, I asked him again. I was starting to lose it myself. Nick sat down on the bed and he said, all my life people have been saying "I want to have your baby!" it's just funny to hear it from you. I picked up the pillow and smacked him with it. Within 10 minutes we were naked. He looked so deeply into my brown eyes and said, do you really, really mean it? Do you want to have another baby? Yes, I said. I want to have your baby. He kissed me so passionately. We fell back to sleep and Megan woke us up at 11a.m. Mom, there is a phone call for you. I sat up and she handed me the cordless. Hi Dr. Weston. uh huh, yes, I already know I'm not. Oh? Are you sure? We do. Uh huh. okay, what time? We'll be there. I hung up the phone and Nick said what did she say? I said I don't know how to tell you this. He said what now? I said you're going to be a daddy? Nick said I am? Blood test confirmed it. I'm about 2-3 weeks pregnant, too early for a urine test to pick that up. Nick and I were very silent for a minute. Then Nick yelled. Yesssssssss! OMG! Are you happy Cindy? Are you really sure you want to do this? I said it's too late to turn back now. Nick said we've got to tell Mom. I said oh. I guess I should call my Mom too. He laughed and said I love you so much, my heart hurts. I love you too. Megan and Aaron had heard Nick scream and came back into the room. What's wrong, Aaron asked? Nick said nothing, nothing at all. Everything is great. They left but they knew something was up. Nick said so what else did she say? I said well, I don't want you to worry but... Uh oh, Nick said. I don't like the sound of this. It's nothing really. The dizziness is gestational diabetes. Diabetes?! No, Nick, not diabetes, gestational diabetes. Pregnant women sometimes get it. It goes away after the birth of the child. We have an appointment at 2pm. Dr. Weston is opening up her clinic just for us. You have some pull in this town I said. Nick still looked worried. I said don't be worried. It's perfectly normal. He kissed me and rubbed my stomach. I'm going to be a daddy again, he said. I'm going to be a daddy.

Chapter 39

We got dressed and went downstairs. Everyone was in the kitchen. Nick sat me down and asked if I was okay? I laughed and said we've got a really long way to go, ask me that later okay? He smiled. Good morning everyone, Nick said. Jane said you're in a good mood. Nick said well I am, and I think you'll be too in just a minute. Jane and Aaron both looked up at him. He said we just found out that Cindy is 2-3 weeks pregnant. They hugged and kissed me and Nick. Megan was pretty quiet. I asked her if I was going to get a hug? She came up and hugged me, but ran outside. I looked at Nick. He said I'll go get her. No, let me. I got up and walked outside. She was sitting down by the dock. Megan, hi baby, what's wrong I asked her? Nothing Mom, I'm fine. I sat down with her. I asked her if she was happy about the baby? Yes, I guess so. I said we're going to be very busy you and me. She looked at me? Why, she asked? Well, we need to buy things for the baby and decorate a room for the baby. I'm going to need your help. You are? she asked. Of course I am, who else will help? She said but now you and Nick are having a kid, you'll have another family. She looked away and my tears ripped down my cheeks. I thought to myself, I knew it! She thinks this child is going to replace her. Megan! Look at me. Her cheeks were stained with her tears too. Megan, you are my family. Nick, this baby and you. Without you there would be no family. She asked if I was going to send her away? Send you away? I would never send you away! You are going to be the big sister! I could never send away the big sister. She finally threw her arms around me. I love you sweetheart. Don't ever believe for one minute that I would give you up. Not ever, I love you. Nick came out and asked if his girls were okay? I said we're just having a mother daughter moment. We'll be in a minute. Megan said, Daddy? Nick said yes? She said just checking. Nick smiled and went back inside. I said Nick loves you. He already told me that if I didn't want any more babies that you would be enough for him. He's happy being your daddy. It just turned out that I'm pregnant and now we have someone else to love. Nick hadn't left all together. I heard breathing and he finally said. Megan? She turned startled that he was still there. He said, I won't love this baby any more or any less than I love you. Do you believe that? She looked from me to him and slowly nodded her head. He said then come here and give me a hug. She jumped up so fast she nearly knocked him over. He asked her if she wanted to come to the doctor visits with us? She said yes. We all headed back inside the house and joined the rest of the family. Is everything okay Jane asked? Megan, said we had a mother daughter moment, but I'm better now. We all laughed. Jane wanted to take Megan out to the zoo. She said afterall, she was going to be a grandma. Aaron wanted to go too. He loved the zoo. I said Megan we have the doctor's appointment, don't you want to go? No, next time Mom. Your gonna be pregnant for a couple days aren't you? We had to laugh, yes honey, atleast. She followed Aaron upstairs and he helped her get ready. They left an hour later. I got on the phone and called everyone. Mom and dad, Ronda, and Ashley. They were all very happy for me. I hung up the phone and Nick said it was time to go. I slipped on my shoes and Nick and I climbed into his Durango and headed to Dr. Weston's office.

Chapter 40

Dr. Weston was waiting for us. She congratulated Nick and I in person. We sat down behind a desk and she told me what she had found. Sugar in the urine which is a clear indication that gestational diabetes is occuring and it's best that we take care of that right now. She handed us literature and asked us if we had any questions so far? Nick was a little overwhelmed with the information and wanted to know if the diabetes would go away? Dr. Weston said yes and no. Confusing Nick even more. She stated that the diabetes would stay throughout the pregnancy, all she could do was control it. After the delivery it could go away. But it could also come back. Usually gestational diabetes means your likely to get it. I looked at Nick and said it is in my family. He looked at Dr. Weston and asked her what do we do now? I'm glad you asked she said. She lifted up a few things onto her desk. A glucose monitor, syringes and insulin. I have to take a shot? I asked. I'm afraid so, twice a day until you deliver. I looked at Nick. I hated needles but now I felt a lot of guilt over what I may have done to cause this. I listened as Dr. Weston explained how everything would work but I couldn't hear a word she was saying. My tears began to over run. Dr. Weston stopped and was asking me what's wrong? I didn't even hear her. Nick pulled me to him and that's when I really lost it. Everyone stopped talking and waited for me. What did I do? I asked. Dr. Weston tried to assure me that it's nothing I did, it's just my genetic makeup. Has anyone ever, you know. Lost a child because of this? Dr. Weston said she promises me she'll never lie to me. She said yes, but usually it's due to poor management. If you watch what you eat and take your insulin you'll have a pretty normal pregnancy. Nick promised her that we would do this together. Dr. Weston handed me a tissue and I wiped my eyes. She asked if I was ready to practice giving myself a shot? No, not really but I don't see that I have much of a choice. They both laughed. She handed me a syringe that she had put, I dontdon't know, water maybe inside. She assured me it wasn't insulin or anything else that would hurt me. She explained to me where I should give the shots and then they waited. They waited a long time too. I was afraid to do it. Nick asked if I wanted him to do it? Finally 20 minutes later I gave myself my first shot. It didn't even hurt! I was relieved but I also felt like a fool for keeping us there so long. Dr. Weston said she wanted me comfortable with it. If I had any questions at all, she didn't want us to hesitate to call her. We promised her we wouldn't. We gathered up our belongings and headed out the door. I was hungry and Nick was too, we didn't really eat much so we stopped of at a restaurant. Nick asked if I wanted to get married sooner now? Yes, I'd like to fit into a normal wedding dress. He said he was thinking the same thing, well not that I'd fit into a normal wedding dress, but he was thinking it would be better to be married sooner since the baby was coming. He would have a crew work on the farm house in Mississippi 24 hours a day if he had too. I looked at Nick and said lets go back there. He said what? I said lets go back to Mississippi, there is something I want before it gets destroyed. He smiled, he knew what I wanted. You want that cradle don't you? I nodded, he said what about Megan? She can come with us. We have to get her registered in school tomorrow. Can we go Friday? He said of course we can, he kissed my forehead and we ate and headed back home. The next day Megan was enrolled in school and the week flew by. She loved her new school and she was able to take a bus on the third day. She had already made a few friends. Things were so perfect for us. Friday we were booked on a flight into Mississippi at 5pm. Megan was just as excited as we were. We would stop off in Alabama for the night Meg would stay with my Mom and dad. Nick and I would be alone. I couldn't wait for that.

Chapter 41

We arrived in Alabama about 7:30 p.m. My parents met us at the airport. They were so glad to see us. Megan and Mom were very close and it brought tears to my eyes when they embraced. Mom asked how I was feeling? I'm fine Mom, and then I hugged her. It was nice to be home again. Nick picked up the rental car and Mom, dad and Megan went home and Nick and I went home. Nick was so excited he couldn't contain himself. He turned off the radio and started getting nasty with me. He told me that he wanted me so bad. He said he was going to fuck me until I begged for him to stop. I told him I hopped he had enough stamina 'cause I didn't plan on having him stop. He stuck his hand up my skirt to see if I was wet. Oh baby, he said. Why do you do this to me? I lifted the lever on the seat and tilted back. I slipped out of my panties and let Nick play with my clit. With my left hand I stroked his rock hard cock in his pants. I swear I thought the seams would give way any minute on his pants. Nick finally pulled into my driveway, I only live 5 minutes from the airport. He said fuck the bags, let's go. I climbed out of my side of the car and Nick was there. He was kissing me so deeply I thought he would lay me across the hood of the car. I fumbled for my keys while Nick had hold of me. I finally got the door open and Nick closed it and put me up against the door. He pulled down my pants and unzipped his pants. He buried his dick so deep inside of me it made me moan. His hands now cupped my breasts as he dicked me and kissed me. He's never been like this and it was scarey and exciting at the same time. Nick lifted me up off the floor his dick still buried deep inside me and carried me to the bedroom. He set me down gently and removed my shirt and bra. He slipped out of his pants and removed his shirt. He buried his face between my legs and sucked on my clit until I came. Then he straddled me and sucked on my nipples bringing me so much pleasure I never wanted it to end. He kept saying my name, Cindy, Cindy, Jesus, I love you so much. His powerful thrusts sending tingles up and down my spine making my nipples fully erect and pleasing to him. He took them both in his mouth and then his body began to shudder. Once Nick rolled off I told him it was good to be home. He laughed and asked me if he had hurt me? No baby, you could never hurt me I said. He promised me he never would. He said he's never felt this way about anyone, ever and it was kind of scarey. I kissed his lips ever so softly with mine. I love you too Nick, it's such a deep love. I can't imagine my life without you. He pulled my face to his and kissed me softly, and then he started kissing me harder. I made him lie back on the bed while I took his manhood in my mouth. Oh the power I had over him. His body would jerk and he would moan, and call out my name. I sucked him until he came again. As he climaxed I rubbed his balls, and stroked his dick. There were no words from him, only tears. He said, Cindy, no one has ever made me feel like this before. I can't live without you. Promise me you'll never leave me? I can't lose you again. I promised him I would never leave. He said his dreams were back and that they were scaring him. You're dreaming again? About the farm? H e nodded his head. Why didn't you tell me, I asked him? He said they were too painful. Nick, what's too painful, I asked? He said, losing me and Megan. He didn't say Jason, he said Megan and I swear, it took the breath right out of my lungs.

Chapter 42

I lay next to him and just became lost in my thoughts. There has got to be away for us to forget about this. I mean, I'm glad that we have been able to find each other but I don't want it hanging over our heads for the rest of our lives. Nick had fallen asleep. I climbed out of bed and wrapped up in a robe. I signed on to the AOL and received 5 IM'S from my friends. I joined them in a private chatroom. They missed me, I haven't been on a computer in weeks. They were asking me lots of questions about Nick. Ronda and Ashley hadn't told them anything. I was so glad for that. I trust them like sisters. I was able to tell them I was getting married and that I was pregnant. Kim left, she was mad at me. She thinks she loves Nick more than I. She eventually came back though. She "said" she got booted off. I don't blame her because if the roles were reversed I'd be upset too. We talked about the wedding and where it would be held and stuff. I felt better and after a while I said good bye. I didn't even look at my email. I climbed back into bed and cuddled close to Nick. His hands went instinctively to my breasts. Why are you dressed he mumbled, half awake? I sat up and removed my robe and laid back down. He brought his lips to kiss my nipples. His tongue circling the nipple. He made me so wet. I can't believe his sex drive. He moved one hand down between my legs and inserted his fingers inside me. Oh baby, he moaned. He buried his face between my legs and licked and sucked he made me cum. He then straddled me and slowly inserted his dick deep inside me. What do you want me to do now he asked? Fuck me I said. He said he loves it when I talk dirty to him. Fuck me Nick, I want your big throbbing dick inside me. His hips began to pump, like this he said? Oh yeah, baby. Just like that. He said do you want me to stop? No! don't stop I said. He reached down to my breasts and sucked on my nipples and fucked me. His lips found mine and he kissed me deeply. I said let me suck on your dick. Nick said he wanted to feel me. I want to be inside of you. Let me make you feel good, baby. You've already pleased me more than any man ever has. Nick laid on the bed and I again sucked on his dick. I raked my teeth over his long thick shaft making him squirm. I flicked the top of his dick with my tongue. He thrusted his hips a little. He wanted more, he wanted so much more. I told him to hold on a minute, I'd be right back. I had read something a long long time ago. I stuck two ice cubes in my mouth and ran back to the bed room. I almost choked 'cause I was laughing. Nick was asking what was so funny but I couldn't speak. I had two ice cubes in my mouth. I grabbed his dick and slid it inside my mouth with the two ice cubes. He screamed! LOL, he enjoyed it. He come all over and asked me how the hell I knew all this stuff? I spit the ice cubes out in a cup on the side of my bed. I was laughing so hard. He stuck his tongue so deep inside of my mouth. He said you like that don't you? I kissed him back, he grabbed the cup with the ice cubes in it and dumped them on me. I screamed and he asked me how it felt?

Chapter 43

We cuddled and laughed until we fell asleep. The next morning we packed up the car and headed to my mom's to pick up Megan. I smiled all the way there. I was so happy to be in love. Nick was a great man. We pulled into the driveway and Megan came running out. She was crying, it scared me at first I thought something had happened to my parents. I took her inside and my Mom and dad said she doesn't want to go to Mississippi. She slept between us all night, my dad didn't look pleased. I looked at her and said but this is where mommy is getting married, don't you want to see? She misses her friends my Mom said. I wiped her tears and said well what should we do? Mom said she could stay. I tried not to smile. I had to bite my lip. I looked at Nick who was looking at the floor and trying not to smile himself. I said if it's all right with ya'll she can stay. Mom and dad both said it would be all right. I kissed her and Nick hugged her and told her he'd miss her. I said we have a long drive, we better get going. I kissed everyone and Nick and I headed to Mississippi. But first we headed back home. Nick said he forgot something. I said what? He said you'll see. He said he needed my help. I got out of the car and followed him inside my house. He said it's in the bedroom. I followed him in the bedroom. Then he pulled me to him and kissed me. Nick, what's wrong with you, I said? He said nothing, I forgot something. He lifted my shirt over my head and slid my bra straps off my shoulder. What? I asked. He said I forgot to kiss here, and here, oh and here. He gently laid me back on the bed. He stood up and removed his shirt and his pants. I slipped out of mine and he came down on me, kissing me and rubbing my body. He said do you still want to go to Mississippi? I said why? What were we going there for again? He brought his mouth down on mine. He slipped his dick inside and bit my lip. Ohhhhhh, he moaned. He said this can't be good for the baby. I tried not to laugh, I said it's fine. He traced my lips with his tongue and then thrusted his tongue deep inside my mouth. His hands came up to my breasts as he finger rolled my nipples. I pushed him off of me and stradled him. He said oh, what's wrong with you? Nothing, I just have this small, small idea. He laughed. I said hold on a minute. I ran into Megan's room. I dug through her toy box. Until I found what I wanted. I walked back into my bedroom and Nick said, you want to Jump rope? I said no. Put your hands up over your head. No way he said. I promised him if he let me tie him up, I'd let him tie me up. His hands immediately went above his head. I leaned over him and tied his hands. He took my nipple in his mouth as I tried to tie his hands. Nick, I whined. He laughed and then I tightened the rope. Ow, he cried. Oh stop it you big sissy. He said ooooooh, you get cocky when you're in control. I opened the drawer of my night table and pulled out a bottle of motion lotion. I smeared it all over his chest. His eyes locked on mine as I did this. He said what are you going to do? Shhhhh, let me concentrate. He laughed, making me laugh. We ended up with the giggles. Then I bent down and licked every inch of his chest. He squirmed and moaned. Especially when I sucked on his nipples. That really turns him on. I ran my hard nipples over his chest. Then I licked his neck and sucked on his big adams apple. He kissed me and asked me how ... but I stuck my tongue in his mouth. No questions I said.

Chapter 44

I continued to lick his chest and his arms, then I made my way down to his dick and I swallowed him whole. He came like that! He said untie me. I continue to lick him. Cindy! It's my turn he said. So I untied him and rolled over on my back. He tied my hands above my head. I have never done this before, it was extremely exciting. He said he loved my hard nipples and he took them into his mouth. He took the bottle of motion lotion and rubbed it all over my chest. He then pulled my legs closer to the bottom of the bed. He had me stretched out tight. He straddled me and kissed me and then he said he was going to make me cum, but not yet. He kissed me and then licked my neck. He sucked on my neck and worked his way down to my chest and stomach. It wasn't long before his face was deep between my legs and I was yelling OH FUCK! OH FUCK!!! He untied me and we lay together in each other's arms. He said we gotta go to Mississippi. I laughed. We got up and took a shower and made our way back to the car. When we walked outside my neighbor from across the street waved. Hello! how are you I asked? He said I was knocking on your door. You're never home anymore. I told him I was moving. He was surprised. You're moving? he said. Nick finally caught up with me and my neighbor said is he the reason you didn't answer the door? I was sooo embarrassed. Nick said hi, I'm Nick Carter. My neighbor said it was nice to meet him. I said we've got to go, we're on our way to Mississippi. We said goodbye and Nick helped me into the car. My neighbor called Nick over and congratulated him. She's a great lady. You're lucky to have her, don't ever hurt her though or this whole block will be on you like the plague. Nick forced a smile and said, he'd never hurt me.

Chapter 45

We headed up to Mississippi and Nick held my hand as he drove. We sang along to the music on the radio. We were both happy. Nick stopped and filled up the tank with gas and we bought some goodies. Nick made a phone call and we climbed back in. He was concerned with my comfort. We arrived in Mississippi just after 7. Nick got us checked in and the conceirge said everything is ready Mr. Carter. I looked at Nick and he asked if I was all right? I'm fine I said, what's ready Nick? He said the room, let's get upstairs. The bellman escorted us up to our hotel room. Nick tipped him at the door and said he could take it from here. Nick opened the door and let me enter first. The entire room was a glow with candle light. A bath had been drawn and rose petals sprinkled in the bath. Oh Nick. He rubbed my shoulders and took the bag I was carrying from my shoulder. He put everything down and began to undress me. We both climbed into the tub. I was very tired and was fighting to stay awake. I knew what was to come. Nick bathed me. He washed my hair and my body. Once out of the tub he carried me to the bed. The entire bed was encircled by a ring of candles. It was beautiful, it also reminds me of something right out of a vampire movie. There were so many candles. He lay me gently on the bed and then he covered me with his body. He pleasured me until I had my first orgasm. The candles gave me a great idea. I rolled Nick over on his ack and stradled him. Making sure he was safely deep inside me I reached over for one of the candles. I smelled it first and then looked at Nick. Wha..what's that for? He asked. I said, you'll see. I held the candle and began to move my hips. He began to moan. Once his eyes closed I began to drip the hot wax on his chest. It shocked him but he liked it. I could literally feel him growing harder inside me. I started moving my hips faster and faster, I kept dripping the wax on him until he finally climaxed. He took the candle from my hand and flipped me over. He buried his face deep between my legs until I came again. He collapsed on top of my body and asked me where I'd been his entire life?

Chapter 46

We fell asleep, I was so tired. Nick ordered room service the next morning and then we went to the farm. The contractors Nick had hired were really good. Scaffolding surrounded the house and the barn was torn down already. Nick promised to build a new barn. He wanted to start over. I just smiled at him. Nick and I climbed the stairs of the porch where we found the cradle. Nick carried it out to the car. I went inside. It was the first time for me. Somethings I saw gave me that familiar feel, like I've seen them before but I know that it was just my dreams of the past. I walked on through the house and saw what was left of the house. The huge living room still had the old furniture. Old broken furniture. None of which was salvagable. I stared out the front windows. A gentle breeze was blowing what was remaining of the curtains. It gave me the chills. I turned and saw an old man standing in the door way. I was about to say something when he faded away. Who was that? I wondered. I turned and quickly left the room. Nick joined me and he could tell I was shaken. I waved it off and we explored the house. Nick opened a door that we knew was the master bedroom. The door next to the master bedroom I couldn't bring myself to open. I just placed my hand on the door. Nick pulled me inside the master bedroom. I can't stay here. I felt it in my heart, how could I tell Nick? We both stood silently in the middle of the room. I had a smile on my face that I couldn't hide. What Cindy? Why are you smiling, he asked? I just shook my head. I don't know, I said. Then the tears came. He pulled me to him and said what's wrong? I apologized but he didn't want to hear my apology he wanted to know what was wrong? I said I can't live here. I heard him exhale. I thought for sure he'd be mad. Then I felt him start to shake. I lifted my face from his chest and noticed he was laughing. Nick what's so funny? I asked. He said he was doing this because he thought I wanted it. I said I thought you wanted... Now we were both laughing. He said let's get out of here. Nick talked to the foreman and we spoke to them. Nick was still going to have the house finished, he figured that he'd try to sell it. They shook hands and Nick and I headed back to the car. I noticed an old hay wagon parked along side the torn down barn. I wondered out loud whether we had ever gone on a hay ride. Nick couldn't remember he helped me into the car and we headed back to the hotel.

Chapter 47

I had to lay down, I was feeling very tired. This baby is sure taking a lot out of me. Nick laid down beside me until I fell asleep. About 2 hours later I woke up and found Nick gone. I was hungry and wondered where he was. I was getting tired of waiting and decided to call room service when he burst through the door. Hey beautiful, I'm glad your awake. I asked where he'd been? He said never mind, come with me I'm starving. He had my attention so I followed him. Everything was gray now, it looks like rain I said. Nick looked worried, I hope not he said. We climbed into the rental car and we headed back towards the farmhouse. Where are we going I asked? Nick said just be patient. We pulled up to the farmhouse and Nick parked near the old hay wagon. He had fresh filled it with fresh hay. Nick, what is... He got out of the car and rushed to my door. He opened the door and said just trust me. I followed him to the back of the car and watched as he pulled out a picnic basket. Nick Carter what are you up to I asked? He told me I'd see, just wait! He closed the trunk and helped me into the wagon. Nick got up next to me and the horses pulled the wagon up behind the farm house over a hill and up another. The son was setting but I was starving. Nick finally stopped the wagon and helped me into the back of the fresh hay. Nick had filled the picnic basket with fruits and cheeses, he also had some Italian food. The sun was almost gone. We ate in the back of the wagon and Nick asked if I liked the suprise? Yes, it's especially nice now that I have eaten. He laughed. He loaded up the picnic basket and set it in the front of the wagon. We laid back and watched as the sky darkened and the stars began to shine. This is beautiful I said. Nick said, no Cindy, you're beautiful. Nick began to kiss me. His hands began to roam all of my body. He was making me hot! He began to undress me. Nick? We are outside. He popped his head up and said we are? Then he laughed and removed my pants. He then undressed himself. He was so horny. He was happy and so was I. We had just started to get in to it when it started to rain. No, not rain, pour. The rain was pounding our bodies. Nick kept going as if it wasn't happening at all. He brought his mouth down on mine. Our bodies were soaking wet but we continued. The rain water beaded up all over our bodies. The moonlight outlined our glistening bodies. I couldn't get enough of him. Then next thing we knew hail started to fall from the sky. Now it was pelting us, stinging our bodies. We quickly grabbed our clothes and headed back to the car. Nick left the wagon beside the barn and the caretaker came out and took care of the wagon. I got into the car and Nick soon followed. He threw his wallet on the seat between us and pulled me to him again. Kissing me so deeply. He started the car and we headed to the hotel. We were soaking wet. I couldn't get my bra back on. It was too hard. We ran through the lobby of the hotel and up to our room and finished what we had started.

Chapter 48

The next morning we packed up our things and drove back to Alabama. Megan was glad to see us and Mom and Dad were glad we'd made it back okay. They had heard about the big storm. Nick and I just looked at each other and smiled. We stayed there for a little while and then it was back to Florida. The flight was pretty turbulent, all I know is the three of us were pretty scared. We landed without incident and drove home. Nick's Mom had flown back to California but Aaron was still there. Meg was glad to see him. They took off and entertained each other while I started the laundry. Nick went into his office to check on his work for the week. He'd have to go up to New York for a few days and was worried about leaving me here alone. I'll be fine you go and do what you have to do. I still have to get the wedding details ironed out. Nick pulled me close and asked if I was still going to marry him? Of course I'm going to marry you, I said. I love you. He leaned in and kissed me. He asked how I was feeling? I'm fine, now go and finish what you were doing. I gotta get this laundry started. He pecked me on the back of the neck and he was gone. I lifted the laundry basket off the floor and I felt a sharp pain rip through me. I put the basket down slowly and tried to sit down. A minute later I felt the blood flowing down my legs. I screamed. Nick came running and he saw my face and he knew something was really wrong. Baby, what is it? he asked. I looked down at the floor and Nick's eyes were huge. Cindy, what is that? He cried. After that I don't remember anything. I had fainted. Nick carried me out to his car and drove me to the hospital. I had a miscarriage. Nick felt awful. I awoke to a very brightly lit room. My mouth was dry and I desperately needed a drink of water. I remember looking around and feeling really groggy. Where am I? I said. I heard Nick's voice say I'm right here, I'm not going anywhere. I fell asleep. I woke some hours later and Nick was asleep. I remembered what happened. I felt my stomach. I could feel the pad between my legs. I lost Nick's baby. I couldn't control my emotions. Nick woke up and noticed my tears. It's okay honey, it's okay I'm right here. He held on to me so tightly. I'm sorry, was all I could say. He kissed my tears away and told me there was nothing to be sorry about. We can have others. He was more concerned about me. How are you feeling? Are you in any pain? He fired one question after another. No, I'm not in any pain. Just my heart... He quickly asked what was wrong with my heart? I said it's broken. He leaned in and told me he loved me. I love you so much, he said.

Chapter 49

I was released a few hours after the DNC. Nick was worried that I hadn't been there long enough. The doctor came in and explained that it wasn't anything that we had done. It just wasn't meant to be this time. He assured us both that we could have more children if we so desired. I was released and Nick drove me home. He had a rental car though. Where's the truck I asked? He said he was having it cleaned. I thought he meant washed and waxed. I said you rent a car while your other one is being cleaned? I almost laughed but I noticed Nick's tears. He said Cindy, there was so much blood. I thought you were going to die. I hung onto him and promised I wasn't going anywhere. Where is Megan I asked, suddenly feeling worried about her? She's with Aaron and the guys. What guys I asked? Brian, AJ, Howie, and Kevin. They've been at the house ever since ... well when this ... for a while. We no sooner pulled into the driveway when Megan flew out the front door. Her tears whipping back into her hair. Mommy, mommy! she cried. I slowly stepped out of the car and embraced her. She was shaking she was so scared. Hey pumpkin, how are you? She said she was scared, she thought I was dead. No baby, I'd never leave you. I tried to smile but the truth was my heart was breaking into so many pieces. Our baby was gone, Nick was so heartbroken. Megan was scared she thought I was going to die. I didn't know it then but I had decided not to put my family through that again. Nick insisted on carrying me inside the house. I felt so foolish. He said he loved me and didn't want me hurting myself. He put me in bed. I had to change my pad first though. It had been awhile. I was crying when I returned to the bed. I'm so tired Nick. I'm just so tired. He cuddled up against me and I fell asleep with him beside me. Over the next few days I was feeling more like my old self. Nick was afraid to touch me now though. I told him we needed to talk. Megan was in school and Aaron had long since gone back home. I told him that I have decided not to have anymore children. He looked so hurt. I slipped my engagement ring off my finger and placed it on the table. My tears stung my eyes, I told him that I understood if he didn't want to marry me now. I love him so much and it was just too unbearable to conceive my life without him. I stood up from the table and headed upstairs. Nick came running after me. Cindy, Cindy wait. I turned and Nick through his tears grabbed my left hand and put my engagement ring back on. He said, it's okay. We can get a dog. I laughed but then I cried. He pulled me close and kissed me. It had been almost a week. My bleeding had stopped and Nick was horny. He asked me if it was okay. I unbuttoned his pants and let them fall to the floor. Nick unbuttoned my shirt and undid my bra taking my erect nipples into his mouth. He then unzipped my jeans and they fell to the floor. I helped him off with his shirt. He laid me back gently on the front stircase and slowly inserted himself inside me. He made me promise to tell him if it hurt. He began to fuck me. His excitement hardly contained. He lifted me off the stairs and carried me upstairs to the bedroom. He laid me out on the bed and continued to please me. He kissed my stomach, my breast, my neck. He said he loved me and then he fucked me so hard I had to double orgasm. Never in my life have I ever had one of those. What a rush! He climaxed and asked me if I was okay? Was I hurting? No, I'm just fine I say. I roll over on top of him, straddling him. Our fingers intertwined I began to pleasure him. I missed you he said. I missed you too Nick.

Chapter 50

Over the next few weeks our sexlife was back full force. Megan was graduating the second grade and our wedding was less than a month away. Everything was coming together well. We were all adjusting to the changes. Megan had new friends and Mom and dad had been a few times to visit. Ronda and Ashley come often as well. My life is perfect. Nick came to me one night asking me to sign some papers. I figured it was a prenup. He was adding me to his checking account and adding me to his insurance. I couldn't control my tears. Why are you so sad he asked? Why are you doing all this I asked? He reminded me that I was to be his wife soon. He smiled, then he pouted and said unless you've found someone else? I said there isn't anybody else. I only have eyes for you. Nick slipped his hand up my skirt. Why are you wearing underwear he asked? I laughed, whatever to you mean I asked? He then took one of his long, slender, beautiful fingers and inserted it inside me. My nipples immediately became hard. You like this huh? He smiled. I just nodded my head. The weather had become very warm, Megan was in school and we were the only ones home. I stripped out of my clothes as Nick did and I sat on the bed waiting for Nick. I went to lay down but he stopped me. He said sit up a minute. So I did, he then sat down and I sat on his lap. He inserted his long dick deep inside me. His hands came up and cupped my breasts. I've never felt like this before. Within minutes I felt how wet I'd become. I started to move, but he stopped me. No, just sit still he said. I tightened my grasp around his dick. His hands worked my breasts and he was kissing the back of my neck. I was telling him that I can't... Can't what he asked? Nick I need you to fuck me now, please... He said not yet. He was torturing me! He would slowly raise he hips off the bed and at the same time grab by breasts. His soft full lips softly kissing my neck. His tongue would trace the outline of my neck and down to my shoulder. Nick, I would say. Nick... He was getting into it now. He sat up causing me to fall forward on my hands as he grabbed my ass and started slamming himself deep inside me. I was screaming as I came. His moans were deep and long. I have never had sex that way before, it was new and exciting and Nick was very good at it. I collapsed down on my stomach and Nick was lying on my back now. Still kissing my neck, telling me he loved me. I love you too, I told him.

Chapter 51

As if on queue, I heard Megan calling, Mom I'm home! Nick stood up and got dressed, he didn't like her coming home and not being greeted by one of us. I hopped into the shower and got dressed. I walked downstairs and found the two of them at the table having an after school snack. Hi Mom, Megan called. Hi honey, I kissed the top of her head. Nick's eyes were fixed on mine. He wanted me again, and I have to admit, I wanted him too. I grabbed a coke from the fridge and sat next to Nick. His hande instinctively went to my thigh. Megan was talking a mile a minute. She would be graduating school soon. The phone rang and she jumped to get it. Nick turned to me and kissed me deeply. Megan called him to the phone a few minutes later. Don't go anywhere he said. I just watched him walk to the phone. Megan came and sat down again. It's Aaron, he's coming to my graduation, she said. He getting me a present. She was all aglow, it made me feel guilty about the baby I'd lost. She would be a terrific older sister. She asked me what was wrong? Huh, what? I asked. She said you're sad again. I'm just thinking what a wonderful big sister you would have been. She smiled and said really? I wiped my tears before Nick came back, he doesn't like to see me sad. We had started talking about getting her a special dress, and she wanted to go try on her maid of honor dress again. Megan if you don't stop wearing that dress, it will be all worn out by the wedding. Nick sat down and again his hand found my thigh. He asked what he missed? We just laughed at him. He so much wanted to be part of a family. The days seemed to be getting shorter and shorter. I was glad for that because it always meant one day less until I'd marry Nick. Megan's graduation day was upon us. Everyone was here. Mom and dad, Ronda, Ashley, Aaron, Bob, Jane, Nick's sisters. Megan was loving all the extra attention. From here we'd all go to Mississippi for the wedding. Megan was excited she not only graduated the second grade but she was also awarded student of the month. I couldn't stop crying, I was so proud of her. I looked at Nick, he had tears in his eyes too. Then I felt my heart break in half. He'd never know this pleasure from his own biological children. Are we doing the right thing? Am I doing the right thing? Nick has opened up his heart and his home to Meg and I. I respond to him by saying no more children. My tears quickly go from happy ones to sad ones. But Nick doesn't know. He has his arm around my waste as we watch Megan accept her diploma.

Chapter 52

We headed back to the house and the party began. Megan was really in her element. She's so dramatic sometimes. Ronda and Ashley tease me that she gets it from me. I don't think so, I'm much more refined than that. Nick comes from behind and wraps his arms around me, are you having fun he asks? I turn to face him, this is way too much for a child who's graduating the second grade. He laughed and said she loves it. He kissed me then he was gone. Ronda tells me how lucky I am to have Nick in my life. I just nod my head, I'm very lucky. Just then I see Kevin walking up behind Ronda with his forefinger on his lips. I look down at the floor so that I don't give it away. He gently places his hands over her eyes and in his deepest, sexiest voice, asks her to guess who it is? I could see her lower lip quiver. She turned and hugged Kevin. They were lost in their own conversation now, neither of them realizing I was stil there. Ashley looked at me and shrugged her shoulders and walked off. Everyone was happy. I saw Nick across the room with Aaron and Megan. As if he knew his head popped up and he glanced around until he found me. Then he smiled. I smiled back and went into the kitchen. Up the backstairs to our bedroom. I stood looking over the balcony and I watched with a smile on my face as I witnessed Kevin helping Ronda into the passenger side of his 4Runner. Then they were gone. The sun was beginning to set but the "party" was still going strong. I freshened up and opened the door to go downstairs. Nick was just coming upstairs. He smile, why are you hiding he asked? I'm not hiding, just freshening up. He pulled me close to him, baby you look good all the time. I just held on to him. He smelled so good, he felt good. I loved him through and through. He raked his fingers through my hair and asked if I was alright? I'm fine I said looking deep into his blue eyes. He said Megan's hungry and I've ordered pizza. I smiled as he led me downstairs.

Chapter 53

That night we made love again. I wanted to just crawl inside his ribcage and stay there. The thought of him made me smile, the feel of them set my heart on fire. He loved my daughter and my daughter had a father now. A full time devoted father. But what did Nick have? He had us, but was that enough? Ronda was downstairs in the kitchen when I woke up. I smiled at her and asked her where she disappeared to? She said Kevin to her to the Ocean, she's never seen the ocean before. The gulf, lakes, rivers, but not the ocean. She said they sat on the sand for hours just talking. Talking, I said? She said well talking and kissing. He said he wasn't sure how I felt about him, I asked him if he needed glasses? I laughed. She said we're driving up to Mississippi together for the wedding. Oh, I said? She said she was sure Ashley would find someone to ride with. I had to laugh. Ronda said what? She's one of my best friends, what would I do without her. I sat down next to her and spilled my guts to her. I have some heavy issues and I'm not sure how to deal with them. She listened to me and when I was done she said, Cindy if you don't want to put your body through that, or your emotions, don't do it. I said but Nick wanted a big family. She said so adopt. One, two, ten kids, but don't put your body through all that. I sat up straight. She looked at me funny, what's the matter she asked? Adoption?! Oh that's a great idea, isn't it? I was so excited I know longer waited for her to answer me. I kissed her on the cheek and told her I loved her. I took the steps two at a time. Nick was still sleeping but I stradled him anyway. He didn't open his eyes but a smile filled his beautiful face. His hands made their way to my breasts and he said good morning. I said Nick, what do you think about adoption? His eyes fluttered and then opened. Pet adoption or kid adoption? I laughed, kids I said. He just looked at me without blinking saying I don't know why? I leaned down and kissed him. I started talking a mile a minute telling him how I've been feeling and about my conversation with Ronda. He just smiled, he said if you want to adopt more children we will. I said no Nick, what do you want? He said I want you to be my wife, and Megan to be our daughter. But I ... He put his fingers on my lips and said, I'm happy with the two of you, don't ever doubt that for a minute. With that he pulled me down to him.

Chapter 54

Later that day we all boarded a private jet to Mississippi. In two days we'd be married. It seems like it's taken forever for this day to get here. Nick made plans for our honeymoon. 2 weeks somewhere remote was all he said. I had to laugh. Megan would stay in Alabama with Mom and dad. The airplane took off and landed in Mississippi. It wasn't a long flight, very short actually. We met up at the hotel and we all drove out to the farmhouse. It was done. Painted and a new barn erected where the old one stood in ruins the last time. Nick pointed at the old wagon we'd been in the last time we were here. All I could do was smile. I took everyone through the small farmhouse. Megan loved it here. She was all over the farm. She was excited, she wanted a horse. Nick laughed, this is what makes me happy Cindy. You don't need to worry about me he said. He grabbed my hand and we sat out on the porch. I noticed a path through the field. I looked over and asked Nick what that was? He said that's the way to the church. I smiled, he had a path cleared for us. We met with the minister and he said his father told him all about the Carter's of the past. They were a couple who were devoted to each other. If one was sad, so was the other. He talked about the wedding and how the bride was married barefoot. Barefoot? Why? He said because it was hot and she was taller than him in heals. I had never thought about that. Nick was much taller than I, we would not have that problem. We talked until we each understood what was to be expected. The minister left and then we joined everyone back at the hotel. Nick and I walked around the farm a little. He said this is a great place isn't it? I said it is, I really like it here but there is something, some feeling I get in that livingroom. He looked at me and said he felt it too. We drove back to the hotel, tonight we'd be separated and tomorrow we'd be reunited forever. We joined everyone in the hotel restaurant and had dinner together. Megan was really excited that it was almost over. The waiting I mean. When a child has to wait the time seems almost doubled, but the truth is I felt the same way. Megan and I would share a room tonight. I wanted to spend some time with her before I left. Nick and I both did. The three of us went back to our room and we played some boardgames, Nick and Megan played Nintendo. Then it was time for Nick to leave. He was staying in the room next door so we wouldn't be to far apart. Megan and showered and climbed into bed. She cuddled up so close to me and told me she loved me. I love you too baby, I said.

Chapter 55

The next day was hectic. We would be married at exactly 12:00, same as the first time. The church was unbelievable small. We were very careful to invite only those who absolutely had to be there. It was still a tight squeeze. Everything seemed to be happening so fast. Nick called and told me he loved me. He talked to Megan for a few mintues and then it was time for him to leave. I could hear Alex throught he wall. Slapping Nick on the back and stuff. Then it was quiet. Ronda and Ashley came in with my parents and said it was time to go. I looked at the clock. 10:50 a.m. I took a deep breath and followed them. At 11:15 a.m. we arrived at the farmhouse. It was an incredibly hot day. But it was a beautiful day. I slipped on my dress and Ronda and Ashley finished up with my makeup and hair. Now it was time to go. I walked through the path to the church. My shoe got caught in a gopher hole and snapped my heal right off. While everyone was shocked I just glanced heavenward and said thank you. I kicked off my shoes and walked the rest of the way in my stocking feet. The bridesmaids were going through. The parents and family members had already been seated. Aaron and Megan walked through together and my dad and I were alone now. He asked me if I was as happy as I looked? I said I am daddy. He kissed my forehead and said then let's not have you wait any more. We walked through the doors into the sanctuary. My eyes glued on Nick. He was shaking, as was I. The short walk to the altar seemed very long, but we finally got there. When the minister asked who gives this woman in holy matrimony, our family and friends, in unison said they did. My tears, I couldn't hold them back anymore. My hand was placed in Nicks and Brian and Alex stepped forward and sang a song for us. It was the song I heard on the radio...

I've loved you forever,

In lifetimes before,

And I promise you never,

Will you hurt anymore,

I give you my word,

I give you my heart,

This is a battle we've won,

And with this vow

Forever has now begun ...

Nick was caressing my hands and then he reached up to wipe my tears. I kept saying hurry, hurry. The song ended and the minister said a prayer and blessed us. Then we said our traditional vows. The minister asked for the rings. Ronda handed me Nick's and I placed them in the minister's hand. I noticed not one ring, but two. I looked up at Nick. The minister blessed the rings and asked Megan to come stand between Nick and I. I was confused, I had no idea what was happening. Nick took my ring and placed it on my finger. I took Nick's ring and placed it on his finger. Nick then took the remaining ring and placed in on Megan's finger. Forever and always, we'll always be family he told her. He hugged her. I had no idea he had planned this. I couldn't control my sobs anymore. They were overtaking me. The minister asked if Iwas all right? Nick said she's happy, she's fine and she's my wife. The minister then stated the obvious, he pronounced us man and wife.

Chapter 56

Nick continued to kiss me until Megan started to climb up on us. Nick lifted her into his arms and we walked out of the church together. I was surprised to see Greg, my exhusband in the church. He was smiling and he had tears in his eyes. He seemed very happy for me. I smiled back and walked out of the church. Nick had a horse drawn carriage that would take us through the field and back down to the house. Nick hadn't noticed before now that I was in my stocking feet. He looked up at me with a confused look on his face. I said the heel of my shoe broke off. The girls thought everything was ruined, but it was perfect. As sign from above, don't you think? Nick put Megan between us and kissed me again. We started towards the house as our friends let loose butterflies. It was us giving something back to nature. Half the town was standing off at the side of the road watching as the church emptied and walked through the field and down to the forever empy farmhouse. Our family and friends joined us there and we celebrated well into the evening. Aaron gave his speech which moved everyone to tears. My dad welcomed Nick into the family. My ex pulled me aside at one point and told me he was happy that I found someone finally. I thought he was insulting me in some way, but he said I deserved to be happy and he couldn't do that for me. He just pleaded with me to allow Megan to remain in his life. Nick patted him on the back from behind and said, Megan's your daughter Greg, nothing will ever change that. I smiled at Nick and he kissed me. They shook hands and Nick and I headed back to the other guests. Kevin and Ronda have been inseparable. They were so cute together. Nick finally looked deep into my eyes and said, it's time to go. We said goodbye and climbed into the limousine. I kissed Megan goodbye, I'll call you baby. I love you, she held on to Nick and I so tightly. I didn't want to leave her for two weeks, but I wanted to be alone with Nick. My Mom peeled her off Nick and he climbed in and we left. It was awful leaving her like that. I just hung onto Nick, he promised it would all work out. We headed for a small airport in Mississippi where we were to board a lear jet to Miami International Airport. Nick, where are we going? He said somewhere where we can be alone, just the two of us. I smiled and said I'd like that. The flight took a little more than 90 minutes and we landed without incident. Thank God for that! Nick then had a limousine waiting for me again, this time I had to be blindfolded. I smiled, we haven't tried this yet Nick. He said give him time, we'd experience everything. I laughed, we took off from the curb and drove about 20 minutes. I could smell the ocean. Nick helped me out of the car and a voice said, Congratulations Mr. & Mrs. Carter. Nick thanked him for us. I was so nervous. Can I take this off now? I asked. Uh uh uh, he said. We are almost there. I could hear our suitcases being removed from the trunk. Nick I'm afraid I'm going to fall. He didn't answer me. Nick, I'm afraid ... he lifted me up into his arms. He said he wouldn't want me to fall. I wrapped my arms around his neck and laid my head on his shoulder. Whatever he was walking on wasn't very sturdy and he kept losing his balance. I begged to be let down. He finally put me down and turned me in the direction he wanted me to face. I asked if I could take off my blindfold? He wouldn't answer me. Nick? Nick this is not funny. Nick! If you don't answer me I'm going to take off this blindfold. He still didn't answer. I lifted my hand and said I'm going take it off. The I removed the blindfold and stood before a huge, yacht. It was outlined in lights. It was the biggest, grandest ship I've ever seen up close. Nick said well don't stop there Mrs. Carter. I shifted my gaze from the boat to Nick who was sitting at my feet. Huh? was all I could say. He said take something else off for me. Then he laughed.

Chapter 57

Nick, what is this I asked? He said our honeymoon transportation, do you like it? We're going on a boat? He said honey, it's not a boat its a yacht. Oh, was all I could say. He grabbed my hand and he led me up the plank. It was really unstable but we made it. There was a crew of four. A captain, first officer, steward, and deckhand. Nick and I were the only two on the ship. Nick led me to the stateroom and said they all had their orders that they are to allow us the utmost privacy. He said we leave in 10 minutes, get changed into something warm and let's go up on deck. We quickly changed and Nick brought a blanket. He led me up to the bow of the ship where he had champagne and fruit and cheeses set up for us. There was a boom box with music playing softly. He threw the blanket on the lounges that were set out for us and asked me to dance. The boat pulled from the dock and we danced in the moonlight. Oh Nick, this is so perfect I said. He nibbled on my neck and told me he loved me. We sat back on the lounges and listened to the music. Sipping champagne and eating fruit and cheeses. Once we were out from the city the lights on the boat went out and the motor cut off. We were surrounded by darkness, only the light of the moon and the stars above us. Nick said I want you right here, right now. Make love to me Cindy. He kissed me so deeply and so passionately it took my breath away. I slipped out of my clothes as did Nick. He covered our naked bodies with the blanket and lowered himself down on me. I could feel his excitement. He slipped two fingers inside of me and brought them to his lips tasting me. Damn, you're so wet. He inserted himself inside me and began to slide himself in and out of me. He was so close to climaxing he had to pull out. He brought his mouth down on my hard nipples and slowly and tenderly sucked on them making my back arch. From pleasure. He brought his head between my legs, slowly kissing my inner thighs and blowing on my clit. The blanket was now thrown on the floor, the heat radiating off our bodies keeping us warm. Nick dove him and began to suck on my clit, poking his tongue inside me. When I was close to climaxing he straddled me again and fucked me until we climaxed together. He fell in a heep on top of me. He pulled the blanket from the floor and wrapped us up inside of it. His blue eyes locked on my brown ones. I love you Cindy. Are you happy? he asked me. Nick, how could I not be happy? I love you more than life itself. Without you, there would be no life for me. He pelted me with soft kisses all over my face and neck. You are the air I breathe he said. I love you with all that I am. I felt my tears release. Why are you crying Nick asked? I'm so happy, I'm so happy. We fell asleep in each others arms and Nick woke me early the next morning. We dressed and he walked me to the back of the boat. Standing behind me and wrapping his strong arms around me we watched the sunrise off the ocean. He said, one down, a lifetime of sunrises to go.