Certitude
Webster’s Dictionary defines ‘certitude" as "freedom from doubt, certainty, confidence". As I watched a commentator speak of Mother Theresa after her death, he referred to certitude as the thing that determined not only the quality of her life but the quality of her contribution.
I began to contemplate the meaning and power of certitude. As I did I began to realize it is so much more than the dictionary defines and "applied certitude" is something that has to be nurtured over a lifetime. As children we function of out an approval oriented system. Pleasing our parents and the world around us seems most important to maintain our security and be loved. Some people never outgrow this. Life becomes about gaining the approval and validation of others. As a Pisces, I can tell you I was certainly concerned with winning in that game. As I began the journey to self-discovery I realized that of course my own self-love and trust would be the keys to my ultimate happiness.
That journey brings up as many questions as it answers. Sometimes there seem to be no answers. At least not when you want them.
What is my purpose here? How do I find my niche? Where is my joy?" Why is loving so challenging? What do I do with my pain? What about the mistakes I have made? How can I forgive when I can’t forget?
The questions go on and on. The willingness to "be" with the questions and to "be" in the process of self-discovery seems to make it easier.
Sometimes, however, you just "know". It may suddenly occur to you in a revelation, or maybe you have always known as far back as you can remember. Maybe a struggle or a tragic event led to a revelation but when you know, you know.
You don’t need anyone’s agreement. You don’t need their opinion or their approval. You just know. It is as if God has spoken to you personally. When that knowing comes it is almost certain that you will be challenged in the future to remember what you know. Bringing your vision into the world you’ll may find yourself challenged by the doubters, negative thinkers, and conventional wisdom. Even the people that love and support you may not understand. Most certainly you will have periods of self-doubt. Read the biographies of anyone who has been a leader or made a life changing contribution and you are sure to find the same experience. The doubting leads to revaluation and reaffirmation. Both things very necessary to stay the course and keep on keeping on.
When Jonas Salk was at work on the polio vaccine he confronted many nay sayers in the medical community. Shortly before his death in an interview with the Los Angeles times he said he knew they were out there but never paid them much attention. He was following his hunch with certitude. When Mother Theresa set about to help the poor the task was daunting. It remained daunting but not to her. She continued on her mission with certitude and left a remarkable legacy. A note here. If you study the lives of people you have admired you may not have to reinvent the wheel and you can learn from their experiences.
How do you nurture certitude? I believe it is a direct result of knowing yourself. Know thyself. What are the fears, the patterns, the expectations, the experiences that determine the quality of your life? Are you at cause or effect? Who do you listen to? Are the opinions and criticisms you receive constructive and said with love or destructive? Who do you give power away to, to determine your value and worth? Is faith in God and yourself a strong part of your daily life? Do you take the time to nurture your peace?
In the evolution of self, I believe we always have a choice. There are events that we may have no control over but we can choose how to respond and how to use these events. And, at the root of our being, there is always a knowledge of the truth. That truth is certitude.
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