Ma  Mrytle

 

Ma Myrtle was one of ten children born to Solomon Thaddeus James Fox and Rose Elizabeth Sinclaire Fox. A close knit and loving family whose gatherings throughout the years were without arguments or quarrels. I can't recall any of my great-aunts or uncles sharing harsh words. Whenever the family gathered it was a gala affair. Each of the siblings had large families and the host required the skills of a professional organizer and catering service. 

She attended school on St. David's Island run by Mr. Frith and Mrs. Hudson. In her teens she became a seamstress having learned her skill from a lady who later became her best friend, Mrs. Etta Pierce of St. George's. Ma Myrtle was conscientious in her trade, often staying up all night to finish a project so that it could be ready on time.  Ma Myrtle was my mothers' mother - my maternal grandmother. 

During Ma Mrytle's marriage to Charles Lewgard Griffiths, one of Bermuda's first pilots, she was a dedicated homemaker and parent to her children, Vernon and Mary Ursula Fox.  She was a soft spoken, gentle woman who maintained an immaculate home. Her treasured collection of fine china and crystal were displayed in  decorative cabinets, with the linen neatly stored in trunks for use on special occasions. Yet, even impromptu visitors commented on her impressive matching crocheted sets gracing the furniture.  All carefully starched with perfectly rippled edges. She welcomed everyone with the words "come and have a cup of tea" and jovial, lively and exciting conversation soon followed.  Ma Myrtle wanted to know all about life's experiences from those of us fortunate to travel, and/or to be educated abroad. Guests to her home never left empty handed, including those whom she had recently met. All would know the pleasure of carrying away a piece of cake to have with a nice hot cup of tea before heading off to bed, or reading one or two inspirational prayers out of "My Daily Bread" from one of Ma Myrtle's monthly issues. She was respected and endeared to all who knew her as a true humanitarian and a practicing Christian. 

Hour after hour, day in and out when I visited with her on the weekends, Ma Myrtle would spend time patiently teaching me the art of caring for fine linen, crystal and china. She was an avid crocheter and her works of art and beauty graced many of her family and friends homes. Visiting her home was an adventure for me. Here I learned the techniques of home decorating and entertaining.

She encouraged her grandchildren with kind words and an evident twinkle within her happy eyes shining and pleased with your honest interest. Often Ma Myrtle placed a few pennies, and sometimes even a dollar into the small palm of the particular  "child" in the limelight before leaving her home. For this exact purpose she kept a small jar on her nightstand, and used it to deposit loose change for the next deserving little person. This became a custom in our family. We would lie across her bed and have the best conversations, taking care not to cause a wrinkle or a crease. 

After Pa Charles died, Ma Myrtle passed her home on to family members and moved in with her sister, Jessie, who ensured that she had the best bedroom in her home. She knew that Ma Myrtle had suffered a great loss not only with both the death of her beloved husband, but also leaving her cherished home filled with so many, many fond memories. Her bedroom had 4 large full length windows which filled the room with light and captured the breezes flowing across St. George's Harbour. Aunt Jessie decorated the room as close in style to Ma Myrtle's home as was within her power. There were large ferns placed upon a table in one of the bedroom corners, and delicate lace curtains at the windows. A lovely pure white bedspread with pastel flowers in the center and along the bottom trimmings decorated her bed. Family pictures and a few pieces of her fine china and crystal were carefully arranged upon the end tables and matching dresser and bureau. 

Returning home from college and later to visit as an adult, immediately after landing at the Bermuda International Airport, my first stop was to see Ma Myrtle, for I knew she was not only waiting with anticipation, but had also prepared the feast for the day for the entire family. What a wonderful homecoming it always was. There was never a disappointment in her home. The tradition lived on even though we had families of our own, and our children soon became a part of the tradition. 

I remember her telling me many times about one of her fondest childhood memories of her mother, Mama Dolly, playing the organ and teaching the children to sing. Although a St. David's Islander, she confessed to not being a very good swimmer. She would walk out until her feet could no longer touch the bottom, and would make a hasty retreat to shallow waters. She was a good grandmother and a loving mother and wife. 

Ma Mrytle always greeted us with "Hello, Darling", a welcome smile and a kiss when we went to see her.  She dressed in clothing which she had tailored, and towards the end, opted to wear brightly coloured housecoats. She wore ribbon and flowers in her hair, signaling her interest in her personal care. We would brush her hair and she would never winch. She had the most beautiful silky white hair, which curled into ringlets, that we would brush trying to straighten them out. While she was hospitalized, she would always ask the last person to leave the room to "brush my hair before you leave" or "lotion my hands".  We complied because we knew that meant a few more minutes by her side and we knew she wanted us to stay there longer. 

Ma Myrtle was a lifetime member of the Chapel of Ease Church, and she as also a Guild member for 49 years. She was honored by the Diocesan Guild Council, an affiliate of the Anglican Guild of the Diocese of Bermuda, with an award for being a long-standing and faithful member. This award was made on May 21, 1987, while she was hospitalized. 

She read her Bible and Daily Word every morning and held hands and prayed before anyone left her side. I was very fortunate to inherit her Family Bible. It is a book worn with age, passages marked, history recorded on its beginning pages, and one which I cherish above all others. This is the Book that guided her through her life; and one which she held in her hands daily. As I now hold it in mine I can feel her life and love flow through me. My memories are vivid and strong of my grandmother.

Her last word to the family with all the strength she could muster, was "disappear". She said that word on June 2, 1987 at 7:30 p.m. before she took her last breath on Wednesday morning at 3:40 a.m. I leave you to ponder what that meant. We all have our different interpretations. 

I have fond memories of my Ma Myrtle as a child, through adolescent years and into womanhood. She was always there. Ever supporting, teaching her skills, encouraging us not to forget.  To carry on. I took her teachings to heart and at a very early age learned the skills she taught me: crocheting, knitting and any hand craft that I put my mind to learning, I do it with preciseness and care. I know that is what she would have wanted. 

To me, Ma Myrtle meant many wonderful things. I wrote the following words about her 12 years ago and they are still true to me today for they captured her life and her warm heart. 
 

M - Many kindnesses she showed to family and friends. 
A - Always thoughtful, cheerful and smiling. 

M - Memories, memories, memories - she never let us forget our heritage. 
Y - Years - she spent with us - numbered 87. 
R - Religious, righteous and regal - ladylike in all movements and mannerisms. 
T - Thankful for God's Blessings to her. 
L - Loving to all who knew her. 
E - Eager to see her offspring succeed in all their endeavors. Encouraging an Enlightening them to keep pressing on to success. 
 

When my Mother recently told me that she wanted to start knitting again, I knew inside me that she was thinking about Ma Myrtle and her childhood years under her Mothers' guidance. As we mentally review our lives, special people mark our thoughts. Ma Myrtle, I am sure, is in the thoughts of many persons whose lives she touched along the way.