You will find desperation and despair in these poems but the purpose for the poetry and writings here on this page is to show you the pain filled process I have gone through at different periods in this walk called life. My own discovery of being a multiple was the beginning of a journey filled with pain, fear, depression, hope, joy, and understanding of myself. Dancing and prancing boldly for all to see, Yet, inside it's soul is losing all desire, It soars upward, breaks free, then becomes a memory. Bedraggled on an evil path where childhood was led. Shown love and hate, all in the same breath, Eyes that know how to hide the tears, The mind dreaming dreams that will never be achieved, Lifes flow pumping through the heart, Children's cries echoe in the ear, Feet walking through the darkness and always trying, Its sound dances on ears that are deafened from a diabolical foe, A voice lost in the past, forever fades, dulling the song of life, Aching arms extend hands forth only to embrace grief and strife, Eyes that look with innocence, belonging to someone else within, A soul pierced with scars, left with a childhood to relive again. For at times it hides behind dark clouds. I don't believe in the fragrance of flowers after the rain, Because winter comes and buries it deep beneath the snow. I don't believe in the radiance of a smile, Far too often, it is replaced with tears. I don't believe in the song of the birds soaring high above me, For they struggle daily just to exist. I don't believe in childhood, It is too easily stolen from you. I don't believe in love, Too many people are at war with each other. I don't believe in innocence, Because I have never known it. I don't believe in happiness, For me it is a mental mirage in the desert of my mind. I don't believe in life, Because its ultimate end is death. Shining my light for all to see, I would if only I could. If I could be a snow capped mountain, giving up my snow to all If I could be the music gliding under the feet of everyone's sorrow, If I could be a gentle breeze blowing on a warm summer's day, But it's only me, a single lonley leaf blowing in the wind, yet together we stand alone. We are a multiple. [My Awards][Apply For My Award] |