The New Beginning

I don't believe that I have ever been asked by God to endure a harder task than loving my ex wife. But the fact is, I do love her, very, very much. She is the best friend I have ever had. We have split several times over the years and have gotten a divorce. I miss her love and friendship terribly.

To any of my bipolar friends, if you are in a relationship where your partner is by your side, doing all they can, literally giving away pieces of their own happiness to try and ensure yours, keep them precious. When you are stable, shift the spotlight to them for a change. Pamper them, spoil them, give them back some of that happiness they have bestowed on you. ALL of God's children have a breaking point.

Any relationship requires nurturing and attention, partnerships with an emotionally ill partner require more at times. One may get the feeling that the scales are a bit tipped. Well, they are. And they probably always will be. This isn't a choice the partner made. They would, if fact, choose that it not be this way. It's a delicate balance all relationships endure. I keep coming back to the ideal of personal strength. I cannot express this enough. The centering of self, the power of prayer and meditation. No relationship will survive when one partner controls, mistreats or demands the spotlight without giving back in return.

Marriage is a choice, pure and simple. By making that choice you hold the heart of your partner in your hands. The vows you make are promises to the other that you will care for them, honor them and be truthful with them. It is your own integrity that is at stake when you make these promises. Breaking them shows your weakness. You dishonor yourself.

I can, without hesitation, say that I have tried as hard and as honestly as could be asked of any person. We have hurt each other greatly.  The stress of such a relationship brought out the worst in me at times, I ask her forgiveness. We both said and did hurtful things. We cannot carry the weight of our hurts around and not forgive. Forgiveness is the answer, always. Without forgiveness there is nothing for us, nothing for you. Stay strong, my friends. Today is The New Beginning.