2004 Movie Reviews
Troy
Ben:
Ruby:
Here comes the return of the ancient epic with plenty of handsome heroes, fearsome battle scenes, and subplots of love, revenge, honour and respect. I remember reading the Iliad by Homer in high school but somehow I sense this movie wasn't true to Homer's plot, hence is why this movie was "inspired by" rather than "based on" (I thought Achilles died in battle rather than the way he did in the movie, I guess a lot of the plot changes were to make the movie a bit more dramatic). Anyways, don't get caught up in the hype before seeing this movie. I loved the previews showing Brad in his fighting gear and exposed muscles and of course the famous thousand ships, but I guess the wonder stopped there. Don't get me wrong, it is quite an achievement just to put this monumental story into a movie but it sort of lost its momentum halfway through the story, like the script was unfinished (what's up with Brad doing the "tisk" thing?) . Anyways, it did pick up near the end when things fell into place.
Van Helsing
Ben: Ruby:
Van Helsing has a minimal plotline but is still worth watching for Hugh Jackman (who is always good), David Wenham's comic relief and the special effects. Probably best to wait until it comes out on DVD and hire it.
Starsky and Hutch
Ben:
Ruby:
Oh no not another TV show made into a move! Well not this time. Starsky and Hutch has all the right elements mixed in and is funny. A smart move was setting the movie in the 70s (yep plently of jokes and bad haircuts). Ben Stiller (Starsky) and Owen Wilson (Hutch) play well off each other (making this feel sort of like a Zoolander 2). Snoop Dog is also very good as the on-the-street informant. Well worth seeing.
Paycheck
Ben: Ruby:
Finally, a movie where the engineer saves the day! Woops, I've given away the ending, but then again you probably already guessed that. Paycheck is another action thriller directed by my fave John Woo (yeah, go the guns in your face, explosions and dove of peace!) and like his other movies, you can expect these signature features that keep you gripping to your seat until the end of the movie. Ben Affleck plays Michael Jennings, a reverse engineer who dissects the latest techno gadgets and improves on them for rival companies. At the end of each project his short term memory (a couple of weeks to 2 months worth) is erased so they can't hold him liable for what he's done. He then gets an offer to work on a project for 2 years where the paycheck would set him up for life. When he wakes up he finds he has signed away all his money and all he has is an envelope of 20 worthless objects. On top of that his former boss is trying to kill him and the FBI are after him. Paycheck is based on a short story by Philip K. Dick, who was also behind the stories of Blade Runner, Total Recall and Minority Report. John Woo does not get into too much of the story he prefers the action staples of guns and car chases. In that respect Paycheck is more like Total Recall, but still fun to watch despite Ben Affleck's wooden acting.
Along Came Polly
Ruby:
Why does Ben Stiller always play the guy who you feel sorry for? (Like in Meet the Parents or Zoolander) In Along Came Polly, he plays Rueben, a risk analyst who naturally doesn't like to take risks and always goes for the safest bets in life. However, he didn't bet on his wife Lisa (Debra Messing) cheating on him at the honeymoon with a french scuba instructor (a very funny Hank Azaria). When he goes home to pick up the pieces, his best friend (Phillip Seymour Hoffman) invites him to a party where he meets Polly (Jennifer Aniston), a carefree fun loving waitress who seems like the polar opposite to Rueben. You can probably guess what happens next in this very funny romantic comedy.
Underworld
Ben: Ruby:
Underworld depicts the latter stages of a 1000 year war between the aristocratic vampires and their former lackeys, the lycans (werewolves). It uses Matrix style action inplace of the more traditional vampire movie traits (macabre, bad hair and makeup, over-the-top fangs, big lapels and spooky organ music). Vampires use guns with silver nitrate filled bullets and use Kung-Fu style moves, while the werewolves are very agile and transform into huge beastlike creatures when provoked. Kate Beckinsale plays Selene (decked out in figure hugging latex), a vampire 'Death Dealer' who discovers the lycans are very interested in a human, Michael (Scott Speedman). Watch out for the very cool Alien 3 like tunnel scenes, Matrix-like flips and gun fights, Bill Nighy as the chief vampire and a very funny slash and pounce move.
The Last Samurai
Ben: Ruby:
If battle scenes, blood and bouncy hair are your thing then this is the movie for you! There's plenty of those plus sweeping landscapes (thanks again to New Zealand disguised as 19th century rural Japan). Tom Cruise plays Captain Nathan Algren, a troubled former US cavalryman, sent to Japan to train their troops in the modern forms of battle. The troops, Algren and Billy Connolly are sent off to fight warriors led by the last samurai, Katsumoto (Ken Watanabe). Algren is injured and captured by Katsumoto and taken back to their village for the Winter. Whilst Algren is nursed back to health by Taka (Katsumoto's sister) he and Katsumoto develop a friendship through brief "converstions". Algren soon learns the ways of the samurai and how to speak Japanese and befriends Taka's children (the one with the Beatle's haircut is very cute). The last part of the movie is the climactic battle scene where the samuari are against all odds. But no worries they have their honour, cool swords and Tom's bouncy hair to help them.
Lost In Translation
Ruby:
This cinematic offering written and directed by Sofia Coppola (who previously made The Virgin Suicides). Its not your straightforward man meets young woman story, they don't fall in love, they don't get it on, so what's the point right? Well, you have to think deeper than that for this movie about an aging movie star (Bill Murray) and a young wife (Scarlett Johansson) who meet in Tokyo. He's there to film a whisky ad for $2 milliion dollars, she's there because her husband is off on a photo shoot. They are both bored, so they talk, they go out with her friends and do Japanese stuff like Karaoke and go to a strip club. There are brilliant funny moments like when the commercial director talks to Bill Murray extensively in Japanese and all the translator says is just one or two words. I could see why this film, its stars and director are getting kudos, its a very fresh way of seeing Japan, exploring how people who have nothing in common on the surface are actually very similar and how they can help each other through whatever personal problems they are dealing with at the time. The direction is very clever, very insightful and very funny and I wasn't disappointed that there were no love interest scenes because that's not the whole point of the movie.
2003 Reviews
Indiana Jones Trilogy DVDs
Ben:
Ruby: Michael D's Review
Finally all the Indiana Jones films have come to DVD! Most importantly they did not mess with the film (are you listening George Lucas?!) and "fix" any special effects with the computer. Well the only thing I noticed was they removed the reflection of the cobra in Raiders of the Lost Ark. The films have been cleaned up a lot and look fantastic. There is no comparison with the old versions which were shown on Australian TV late in 2003, just before the release of the DVDs. Whilst I would have liked a commentary from George Lucas and Steven Spielburg (I find that I don't watch than many of our DVDs with the commentary on) the making of featurettes cover things quite well. There are 4 DVDs in this set: 3 are for each movie only and the special features are all on the remaining DVD. Each of the three films are excellent and lots of fun to watch and this DVD Boxset is well worth getting.
LOTR: The Return of the King
Ben: Ruby:
Return of The King is the last film in Peter Jackson's adaptation of J.R.R Tolkein's Lord of the Rings. The film is mainly a large battle and Frodo and Sam's journey to take the Ring to Mt Doom. This is an excellent film, despite this being nearly 3.5 hours long. Ruby was a bit disappointed that there was not as much of Legolas in this film (well she should have gotten plenty of that in Pirates of the Caribbean). Peter Jackson and his team have done a great job and there should be many Oscars (at least Best Director and Best Film) awarded to this film. Now I can't wait for the Extended Edition DVD sometime in 2004!
Love Actually
Ben: Ruby:
Love Actually is the answer you hear when someone asks "what is this movie about?". This Richard Curtis movie with the who's who in British comedy and a couple of token American actors is quite entertaining with many funny moments, especially those with Hugh Grant as the British Prime Minister (imagine that?) and a cameo by Mr. Bean (Rowan Atkinson) trying to wrap a present. Like Four Weddings and a Funeral, there are multiple "love" storylines: a father and his stepson (who played the young Hitler in Hilter: The Rise of Evil miniseries) who is in love with a girl at school, two porno actors trying to start a relationship outside their work, a newly elected Prime Minister infatuated with his tea lady, his sister who suspects her husband is having an affair but really isn't, an American lady who has a crush on her co-worker but has sibling obligations that get in the way, a writer who falls in love with his Portuguese housekeeper even though they don't speak the same language, a man who is in love with his best friend's wife, an aging rock star (Bill Nighy) attempting a comeback (by doing a Christmas version of the song "Love is all around us" from Four Weddings and a Funeral) and "Eamon" (Kris Marshall) who goes to America in search of beautiful girls to get it on with (if you don't know who "Eamon" is, why don't you watch The Most Fertile Man in Ireland, he's also Nick in the BBC comedy series My Family which is also very funny). This is a very funny movie, worth watching for those humourous moments and aspects of love that you don't usually think about. I can't wait for this DVD to come out.
LOTR: The Two Towers Special Extended Edition DVD
Ben: Ruby: (5 extra for Legolas!) Michael D's Review
The Two Towers was always going to be the hardest of the books to film. Whilst the first film was a 'road movie' and fairly linear in storyline, The Two Towers has several separate story lines. Peter Jackson and his team have done an excellent job of intertwining the stories. Whilst the standard edition is a great movie, it only gets 4.5 stars. The Extended Edition's 42 extra minutes makes The Two Towers a much better film. In the standard edition DVD there are two discs (one for the movie the other for the special features). By comparison the Extended Edition comes with 4 jam packed DVDs. The packaging and layout is similar to the Extended Edition of Fellowship of the Ring: the movie (with four commentaries) is spread across 2 DVDs with the other 2 for the special features (there are heaps of featurettes on how the various aspects of this film were made along with showcasing New Zealand as Middle Earth). This is certainly the version of the film to get and is certainly worth the extra money. Ruby gave it 5 stars due to there being even more Legolas in the Extended Edition...
Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World
Ben: Ruby:(1 extra star for Russell!)
Its been 5 years since Peter Weir's last film, The Truman Show, but it has been worth the wait. Master and Commander is set in the early 19th Century during the early Napoleonic wars where Captain Jack Aubrey (Russell Crowe) is hunting a French ship which is somewhere in the waters off South America. Russell Crowe certainly delivers in this film (once again!). Pity he is no longer in the running for an Oscar, he should have been at least nominated. The cinematography is excellent (Ruby nearly got seasick, but was too busy getting into the action) especially considering this is all at sea. This film is certainly worth watching.
Matrix: Revolutions & Matrix: Reloaded
Ben:
Ruby:
The Matrix was an excellent film (one of my top ten) which redefined the action genre. It had style, substance, great music and was just a very cool movie. The sequels had a lot to live up to. They failed. These sequels are missing everything that made the first Matrix so good. The story was very weak and the endings of both movies very contrived and formulaic. Whilst I was not expecting them to redefine the action genre (again), they could have at least had music that was nearly as good as the first film. The special effects are just as good if not better in these two, but this alone cannot make up for the other drawbacks to these two films. How could these turkey's be made by the same directors as The Matrix? This really reminds me of another really bad sequel, Highlander 2. I left the theatre feeling cheated and disappointed, quite simply not worth watching, spend your money elsewhere. Lets hope they have the sense not to make any more sequels...
I only have one question for the directors of these films. Who are you and what have you done with the real Wachowski brothers?
Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines
Ben: Ruby:
T3 had to live up to a large amount of hype. First up The Terminator and T2 were excellent and a hard act to follow (maybe that's why James Cameron did not want to make T3!). Second they hyped up this film way way way too much. Whilst T3 is a good film (2 of the stars are for the crane chase scene) it simply cannot live up to the hype and the 2 films that proceeded it. Also in the first two films the music was very well tied into the action, not so in T3. In fact fix up the music to be of the same standard as T2 and I would have given T3 3.5 stars.
Guide to the Movie and DVD Ratings
Ben's system:
5 stars: Great! I would definitely get the DVD version and I certainly recommend seeing this
4 stars: Good movie, just missing something that makes it a great movie. I might get the DVD and would certainly watch on it TV. Worth seeing at the cinema.
3 stars: Not bad, can't really recommend spending money to see it in a cinema, should hire it on video/DVD
2 stars: OK, might watch it on TV if there was nothing else on and I was bored.
1 star: This was either a bad sequel or the director/writers are full of themselves. Not even worth hiring. Should be studied as to not what to do.
0 stars: Utter complete trash, not even worth making. Will go out of my way to avoid this in the future.
The Ruby System:
The same as Ben's system except extra points are given for the following criteria:
5 stars - includes Orlando Bloom (the Legolas factor), Tom Cruise or Directed by John Woo or Cameron Crowe
2 stars - if there is a 'crack-up' moment in the movie (e.g. in Mickey Blue Eyes when Hugh Grant is trying to talk like a mobster)
Last Updated: 16th May 2004
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