MS Musings

This page is dedicated to all of my fellow MSer's out there in the world. I'd like to fill this space with the poetry and writings of those who really know what it's like to live with this MonSter. Sometimes we dance with it, sometimes we wrestle with it and sometimes we are pinned down by it. But, we must never give in to it and let it win. As Paul said we must "fight the good fight". And remember we are never alone.

Please email me with anything you would like to contribute!

The lowest is wanting to dive head first into the pain -
feeling the darkness all around and knowing only God is there to hold you and wishing He would just carry you back home with Him -
being so tired you know that the only rest you will get is in the grave.

Then the sun comes up and a bird sings outside my bedroom window.
The neighbor's cat is sunning itself on our garden wall
and across the backyard fence trees are blossoming.
This is all that matters,
not the past or the future or the pain;
just this one perfect moment.
God gives us beautiful moments to make us smile, to make us strong.

By: Judy M.

The following four poems were submitted and written by: K. F. Markiewitcz(All are copy righted 1997)

Thanks Kenny!

Life's Train

I sit beside the tracks
and watch the world go by...
I used to be the engineer
but now can't even ride...
Others now control the speed
and all the turns it makes...
How or when or if you ride
and what seat you should take...
What you once did won't matter
who you were has past...
The respect you built has gone away
from what you thought would last...
so take control and sound your horn
go where you want to go...
Before the ride has ended
no one remembers or even knows...

Demons

Where do the demons live?
They live inside your mind...
They come out when you least expect
they come out anytime...

They hide among the shadows
and invade your very soul...
They live off of your darkest thoughts
and need little to take hold...

When you're sad they're happy
in despair they're right at home...
They make you feel confused and hurt
and so very much alone...

We all have different demons
that live inside us all...
They know the buttons they should push
and see how far we fall...

The strings to pull to make us dance
they know ahead of time...
Cause we create each demon
that lives inside our mind...

Did You Feel It?

Could you feel the fear,
the day you were first told?
You had no idea what to think,
or if you would grow old...

Then the fear subsided,
and anger took it's place,
I've been fair to everyone,
I don't deserve this fate...

Did acceptance come to you easy
when there was nothing else...
Or did you try and fight it
until you were by yourself...

Did you feel the lonliness
for things you used to do...
Then depression and despair
filled every part of you...

Can you feel life leaving you
when you're tired of the fight...
It happens when you're all alone
in the middle of the night...

And have you found a way to cope
with the voices from within...
The life you had is over,
but a new one can begin...

The Phone Rings Silent