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Moo.

Thank you for visiting Heffa's Happy Homepage. Believe it or not, this is a frames page! (The horror! The humanity!) Yes, I figured out how to make frames, and with my newly acquired knowledge I hope to take over the world. Or, at least, I hope to annoy a few people. (I'm so good at that.)

If you're totally annoyed, then please go to the non-frames version.

Oh, yeah, so where was I? Yes, that's right, welcome to my page. This one is rather humble, but I've done that on purpose. If you click on any of the lovely little links to the left, you'll not only have given in to my alliterative abilities, but you'll also see more about me (and my not-so-humble other pages...dedicated to me, myself, and I. Do I need to mention that I'm an only child?).

So go ahead. What are you waiting for? Click! Click!

Oh, I know what you're waiting for. You remember my older Heffa pages, the ones with the $20 bill. Oh, all right.

Yeah, yeah, I know I have to bribe you to come here. Just as long as you keep coming back (and you tell your friends), I suppose I'll let it slide.

Unfortunately, if you wanted to see how many of your friends (and mine) have visited, well, you'll just have to keep wondering. After years of problematic counters, I've decided to remove any and all counters completely. Just assume that my page is one of the best-viewed sites on the web. :) (And if you believe that, I have a pet rock I can sell you, too. His name is Mortimer.)

This page was last updated on June 10, 2005.