Since there appear to be an epidemic of hoser gatherings just now (ain’t it GRAND?), for
      my wee bit of Gaelic instruction this week, I thought to provide a few useful phrases for
      Close Encounters of the *Hosed* Kind. *g*

      When first you meet, after pouncing on a Lallyshirted person with a big hug, you can
      say....

      Ciamar a tha thu?
      Kimmer uh ha oo?
      How are you?
 

      When that person looks at you with a puzzled expression, you can say....

      Nach eil thu gam aithneachadh?
      Nach ill oo gam ann-yochugh?
      Don’t you recognize me?
 

      The hoser is still stumped, and so you say....

      Is mise... Merc!!!
      Iss meeshuh....Merc!!
      I am... Merc!!!
 

      Then, you hope the other hoser says to you....

      Tha mi toilicht d’fhaicinn!
      Ha mee tolleech-tch dech-keen!
      I am pleased to see you!

      Next, cutting right to the heart of the matter, you say....

      A bheil thu g iarraidh uisge-beatha?
      Uh vil oo g-ee-urry ooshk-yuh beh-huh?
      Do you want whisky? hehehehe

      An interesting side note, and testimony to the importance Scots give to
      their Scotch, the literal translation of whisky in Gaelic is water (uisge) of
      life (beatha).

      And lastly, the tales I hear of several hoser gatherings lead me to believe that the
      following phrase might also come in verra handy......

      De th’ort fo d’fheileadh?
      Jae horsht fot aelugh?
      What do you wear under your kilt?
 
 
 

      Lady Mercedes

Sourse:  Everyday Gaelic, by Morag MacNeill.
  Copyright 1991, GAIRM Publications, Glasgow