last friday night my friend abdul called me and in his customary way asked me if i wanted to go with him to Buzz tonight. i had never been to buzz. it's some sort of a rave oriented night club, where people can trance out to various electronic sounds while munching on E and other shit all night. since i had nothing to do and no desire to do nothing at all, i said sure see you around 9pm. "oh yeah, you'll have to share half a pill with castro" the fucker said in parting. since he was providing the pills i didn't feel like getting mad at that. but in my head a little voice said "this sucks". half a pill doesn't do shit for me. i'm not like abdul who likes to think he's freaking on even mild doses. last time i did a tab and a half, which put me squarely in the fazed and dazed bracket i like to be in. what's the point of doing drugs, if you can still think about the shit that is your life. i like escaping reality, in fact i am a hard core fantasizer. sometimes i think that is because i am artistic and i need this freaky imagination to be uninhibited, to seek out new ideas and demons to slay so to speak. you say "that's bullshit, dumbass", but hey it's my bullshit. but, this rather dubious theory of mine gets challenged a lot by my hedonistic ways. that's why i need "peace and quiet", which is what people around me don't seem to realize.
anyway, i smoke a quick joint and then hop on down to the metro. i always like riding the metro when high, i dig watching people. everybody has their own little madness and i like to catch glimpses of it and laugh at it in my own evil and wicked way. so i'm on the platform and there's quite a few people there. there's a big, big woman in a purple coat, there's a white dude trying to grow dreads who is in army pants cuttoff to be shorts. there's another dude in a reddish suit and me in my orange sweater. that's all the color there was on this platform, everybody else was in grey/black or blue jeans. what clones. you have to be part of the group, that's just shithole thinking. suddenly i hear a little voice screaming "i don't want to, nooo.." i look over to my right and a little girl is yelling up to her mom. the mom's trying to pull her back from the edge of the platform and the girl was resisting. i wanted to yell to the mom to let the little kid do whatever she wanted. kids are people too. we forget that all too often subjecting them to our whims and desires. it was funny, the little girl was so feisty but finally the mom's just grabbed her off the ground and took her away. i started muttering "i don't wanna mom...", looked around and this woman was looking at me all amused. yeah that's me the fun meister, the scrouge of the schemie, the train rolled by, we all got on with it. life that is. time moved forward.
i pushed 06 on the building phone, my friend got it and buzzed me in. there were two other people in the apt. Castro and another girl who was with him.
