An odd name for a page I know, but the
fact is that is exactly what it is!
I have been collecting little things I have
read or been told for years and now I want
to share them with others. I am not sure who
wrote some of them so if anyone knows
please enlighten me so I can add the authors name.

 

A Breath of Rome

To explain the circulation of the earth's atmosphere
meteorologists sometimes employ an illustration called
"Caesars Last Breath".
By coincidence, the average number of molecules of air
in a human lung is close to the number of "lungful
equivalents" in the earth's atmosphere.
In the two thousand years since Julius Caesar died
of his stab wounds in Rome, there has been plenty
of time for mixing, so the molecules he
exhaled as he perished are now everywhere.
On average, each time you take a breath, you
take in one molecule that Caesar gasped out.

Life Cycles

When your world's set in  motion at the instant of birth,
and the ingredients mixed, with the grief and mirth.
Then an hourglass is up-ended and the sand starts to spill,
your cycles start grinding like the stones of a mill.
Each nine years they'll give you a moment to pause
to sort out your life and repair the flaws.
Then a new cycle dawns as the hourglass is turned
and you're off to adventure with old lessons learned.
As the years tick away on your journey of life,
you must study success and your reasons for strife.
The goals that you gain are of little import,
if your spirit is damaged and your morals are bought.
When you receive blows that cause you to stumble
look for the lesson and learn to be humble.
Some cycles are painful and some are a joy,
you'll feel many times that you're only fate's toy.
Yet your journey has purpose and is part of a plan,
at the end of its run, you're back where it began.
As the last grain of sand slips from the glass
Here comes a new cycle and there goes the last.
Written by John Arthur Daley
 

A Caution to Children:

Little Willie from his mirror
licked the mercury right off
thinking in his childish error
it would cure his whooping cough.
At the funeral his mother
smartly said to Mrs. Brown
"Twas a chilly day for Willie
when the mercury went down!"

Temptations I can't resist

Trying on beautiful clothes I can't afford.

Pinching all the black jelly beans first.

Pushing the walk button at the traffice lights
even though there are people already waiting.

Popping the bubbles in the bubble wrap.

Running my hand over my sons head just
after he had a crew cut.

Thanking the vending machine for my parking ticket.

I Have Learnt

That the odd sock you lose in the wash always
falls out your tracksuit at the supermarket.

That the car doing 40km/h in front of you will exceed
the speed limit when you reach an overtaking lane.

That even a mosquito doesn't get a slap on the back
until he starts to work.

That whenever I go on a diet someone always
buys me chocolate.

When a woman says the car is making a strange noise,
it's her imagination, but when a man says the same thing,
he's a knowledgeable mechanic.

When you have children, there is no such thing
as a quick trip to the shops.

Insurance covers everything - except what happens.

Don't hide the chocolate in the washing machine.

The opposite of love is not hate
but indifference.

Someone will always get a "call of nature"
the minute you have finished making the loo sparkle.

The harder it is to understand the menu, the
higher the prices.

Someone will always knock on the door
when you are yelling at your kids.

Silly Poems.

One Good Churn

Two frogs fell in a deep cream bowl
one was an optimistic soul.
But the other took a gloomy view,
"We'll drown!"  he croaked,
without more ado.
And with a last despairing cry
he flung up his legs and said goodbye.
Said the other frog with merry grin
"I can't get out, but I won't give in!"
I'll swim around till my strength is spent,
and then I'll die the more content."
Bravely he swam until it would seem
his struggles began to churn the cream.
On top of the butter at last he stopped
and out of the bowl, he gaily hopped.
The moral, of course is easily found -
If you can't hop out, keep swimming around!

Movie Mistakes

The John Wayne movie, "Stagecoach" was set in the
19th century, but if you look carefully, you can see tyre tracks
clearly visible in the sand.

In "Star Wars" where Carrie Fisher plays Princess Leia,
Mark Hamill once greets her by her real name.

In Walt Disney's, "The story of Robin Hood", Maid
Marian wears a dress with a zip.

King Arthur wears a bandaid on his neck in "Camelot".

Janet Leigh gulps twice in "Psycho" when she is dead.
 

As you can see there is all kinds of things on this page
most of which I have collected from magazines.
If you want more go to my Just for fun poetry page
with Aussie Poetry I have found here and there.