10 Reasons Why Dogs Are Better Than Cats...

1. Dogs come when you call them. Cats take a message to get back to you.


2. Dogs let you give them a bath and love you anyway. Cats take out a contract on your life.


3. Dogs bark to wake you up if the house is on fire. Cats sneak out the back door.


4. Dogs bring you your slippers and the newspaper. Cats bring you a dead mouse.


5. Dogs play frisbie with you all afternoon. Cats take a three hour nap.


6. Dogs sit in the car next to you. Cats require a private box to go at all.


7. Dogs greet you and lick your face when you come home from work. Cats are mad that you went.


8. Dogs sit, lie down, and heel on command. Cats smirk and walk away.


9. Dogs tilt their heads and listen whenever you talk. Cats yawn and close their eyes.


10. Dogs give you total love forever. Catsmake you pay for every mistake you've made.



Histories are more full of examples of the
fidelity of dogs than of friends.



DOG HAIKU

I love my master;
Thus I perfume myself with
This long-rotten squirrel.


I lie belly-up
In the sunshine, happier than
You ever will be.


Today I sniffed
Many dog butts-I celebrate
By kissing your face.


I sound the alarm!
Paperboy-come to kill us all-
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!


I sound the alarm!
Mailman Fiend-come to kill us all-
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!


I sound the alarm!
Meter reader-come to kill us all-
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!


I sound the alarm!
Garbage man-come to kill us all-
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!


I sound the alarm!
Neighbor's cat-come to kill us all-
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!


I lift my leg and
Wiz on each bush. Hello, Spot-
Sniff this and weep.


How do I love thee?
The ways are as numberless as
My hairs on the rug.


My human is home!
I am so ecstatic I have
Made a puddle.


I hate my choke chain-
Look, world, they strangle me!
Ack Ack Ack Ack Ack.


Sleeping here, my chin
On your foot-no greater bliss-well,
Maybe catching cats.


Look in my eyes and
Deny it. No human could
Love you as much as I do.


The cat is not all
Bad-she fills the litter box
With Tootie Rolls.


Dig under fence-why?
Because it's there. Because it's
There. Because it's there!


I am your best friend,
Now, always, and especially
When you are eating.


You may call them fleas,
But they are far more-I call
Them a vocation.


My owner's mood is
Romantic-I lie near their
Feet. I fart a big one.




A BOY AND A DOG

I want my boy to have a dog,
Or maybe two or three...
He'll learn from them much easier
Than he would learn from me.


A dog will show him how to love
And bear no grudge or hate;
I'm not so good at that myself
But dogs will do it straight.


I want my boy to have a dog
To be his pal and friend,
So he may learn that friendship
Is faithful to the end.


There never yet has been a dog
Who learned to double-cross,
Nor catered to you when you won
Then dropped you when you lost.






E-mail me if you'd like to submit a poem or dog quote.



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