For those of you who don't know, Norbert and I met in 1987 when I, Susan, went to visit my family in Germany. Norbert was a friend of my cousin's from high school. When I returned to Germany in 1993, I met him again. One thing led to another . . . well, you know how it goes! When he came to the US we didn't really intend to get married right away, although we were engaged. We had hoped to find a company to sponsor Norbert's stay in this country, but were disappointed. Basically, we either had to get married or Norbert had to go back to Germany. We decided on a Tuesday to get married that Friday, and that's just what we did!
On Friday morning, the 22nd of November, 1996, my parents arrived in Toledo, as did my friend Angela and her (at that time) significant other, Ben. In keeping with tradition, Angela and my mother made sure that the bride had her "something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue." Something old was a handkerchief which belonged to my paternal grandmother, brought to me by my mother, while the dress and all it's accessories were new. Angela took care of something borrowed by allowing me to use her nail polish, which she dug out of her purse. (Please forgive the omission of something blue- some things are best left private!)
Then we drove to the courthouse downtown, where we still had to get our marriage
license. Two days earlier we went there to make certain that Norbert's papers
were in order, so we felt confident that there wouldn't be any problems. When
it was our turn, we found that everything was fine with Norbert's papers, but
not with mine! My driver's license was issued in Solon, Cuyahoga county, and
I had no proof with me that I was a resident of Toledo, Lucas county. Why this
mattered is still a mystery, yet matter it did. Ben drove me back to the apartment
to get my checkbook, which had my Toledo address in it, while the rest of the
gang waited by the snack bar. Ben made the trip in record speed, looking upon
traffic lights and other vehicles as mere annoyances along the way. At least
there was no problem with the checkbook upon return, and we were finally given
permission to marry.
With license in hand and family and friends at our side, we went to find a minister.
There were 5 or 6 on rotation, and we got Rev. John Oliver. We had the option
to conduct the ceremony in the hallway or outdoors. Somehow getting married
in a hallway didn't sound too nice, even though it was quite cool outside. The
sun was shining, and we decided it was too beautiful of a day to pass it by.
We picked a spot under a pretty tree with red berries to be married. While we
had been waiting for our license, the minister had spoken to my parents and
had discovered that they were both Elders in the Presbyterian church. Rev. Oliver
must have appreciated that, because he allowed my parents to be quite active
in the ceremony. My mother began the ceremony with a heartfelt prayer (interrupted
only by the minister's intermittent "Oh yes, Lord" and the like).
It was my father who asked us, "Do you Norbert . . ." and "Do
you Susan . . . " and we both answered, "I do!" He got all choked
up during this, as he was not prepared to be saying these words to his daughter.
The minister took over the part with the rings, when my father handed back the
book (it said something about the power vested by the State of Ohio, and he
didn't think he had any of that). Then came Norbert's problems, when the minister
asked him to repeat the words, "With this ring I thee wed." Poor Norbert
had never heard this strange form of old English, and had to ask the minister
to repeat it, which he did. Alas, it seemed no clearer the second time, and
he looked helplessly at me. I then broke it down into smaller pieces. "With
this ring" went okay, but Norbert had to repeat "I thee wed"
phonetically. I explained to him after the ceremony what he had said, and what
it meant (he didn't believe that he had promised to give me foot massages every
day).
After the ceremony we all went back to our apartment, where we had prepared
a table of finger food and champagne for a little reception. We even had a cake,
which we fed to each other. This was pushing the trust of the newlyweds. Norbert
of course knew that he could trust me completely-- trust me to smash the cake
onto his face, that is! But I didn't get off easy, either...
In the afternoon two more friends arrived: Tammy, who is an old friend of mine
from church in Lima, and Diana, who is a new friend from law school. We were
all planning to go out to dinner together. Our guests wouldn't allow us to drive
anywhere, however, until they tied cans behind the car, and put a "Just
Married" sign in the window. I had to stop by school in the afternoon to
pay tuition (a lovely way to spend your wedding day, don't you agree?), and
felt rather silly pulling up alone with my car decked out like that!
We then went to a French restaurant, where we started with appetizers and wine. When the salad came, I got an upset stomach, undoubtedly from the excitement of the day and dehydration. In spite of a short walk in the brisk air it grew worse, and the newlyweds unfortunately had to bow out before the meal arrived. This fits with our "unconventional" wedding, in a way. It is tradition for the bride and groom to leave the reception early, but usually not before dinner. My parents saved the day by bringing dinner home for us after entertaining the rest of our guests.
All in all, we are very happy about how nicely our wedding day went. Despite
the few little blunders described here, it was far more festive than we had
expected or hoped for. And all of this with only two days preparation! We couldn't
be happier with the way it turned out.
Another amusing story related to our wedding happened 2 days later, on our way
to Detroit for some shopping at the Sommerset Collection. I noticed a police
car in the rear view mirror, and paid close attention to my speed as it approached.
The police car pulled up directly next to us, and turned it's siren on! I knew
I wasn't speeding, and was completely flustered, not knowing why this cop was
signaling me. I pulled over to the right lane bewildered, and was prepared to
stop. To our amazement the police car did not pull us over, but waved, and drove
by. It wasn't until this moment that we realized we still had the "Just
Married" sign in our back window, and were being congratulated.
Our thanks go out to all who were at our wedding, either in person or in thought. Also, our names have not changed. We will continue to be known by our given names.
