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Hansie Cronje's got nothing on this lot!

City in match fixing scandal

Bradford City Players have been involved in one of the worlds greatest betting scams of all time it has been claimed today. Struggling Bradford City have been quite deliberately avoiding points in games in attempt to become the worlds richest club it has been revealed today. Read on for the details of this galactically stupid scheme to get rich quick.

Upon promotion to the premier league the board decided that avoiding relegation would cost an approximated £20 million: funds that they simply didn't have.

The club had promised it's fans a grandiose stadium to rival the best: which revenue could never cover.

The wage bill was increasing all of the time, again the club could not afford to match these wage bills.

The players were crap and not a single decent player wanted to play for a pittance: therefore Premier league status would be impossible to maintain.

In an attempt to ensure the clubs future success a plan was devised to ensure that funds would be forthcoming for the following season, in which City would be promoted back into the premier league BEFORE CHRISTMAS. How could this be achieved? Through cheating.

The players have been on bonuses to THROW games: Evidence, West Ham, Watford, Sheffield Wednesday away. The manager has been threatened with the sack IF we stay up: Evidence, substitutions at Sheffield away, the 'Fall Out' with Lee Mills and the bizzarre decisions to play Dean Saunders.

The opposition have been bribed to allow City to score goals, with thousands of pounds being bet upon final score lines as unlikely as West Ham 5 Bradford City 4. The club, in doing so are raking it in for next years promotion push.

The get rich quick scheme has proved so successful that other teams have been eager to get in on the act, Charlton for example allegedly making MILLIONS by throwing the game against Huddersfield (HAD to be thrown... didn't it?). Leeds are financing the purchase of diamond plated toilet seats for the Directors box through their improbable slide down the table and even lowly Sheffield Wednesday have cashed in by offering to WIN games against much mightier opposition.

City chiefs shrugged off the accusations as some crap we'd made up whilst blathered, proof I'm sure that there is some truth behind these allegations.

How else can our erratic form and total ignorance of the art of tackling be explained?

 Read TEAM SQUAWK next week to find out.....

Team Squawk is produced using several gallons of Timothy Taylors Landlord. Anything on these pages should be taken as the word of someone very truly drunk and any allegations which are proved to be correct are purely coincidental.