Here is a short list of my favorite quotes. Most are humorous, while the others I just threw in because I felt that they describe me somehow.


"Facts compel me to conclude that my brain was never formed for much thinking."
     -Charles Darwin

"The problem is that I have a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."

"Just because I bought a radar detector doesnt mean I'll speed excessively, just succesfully."

"I can drink 15 shots of Captain Morgan's. Some may call it a problem. I call it a gift."

"My girlfriend and I broke up over religious differences. I thought I was God, and she disagreed."

"Some people are only alive because it is illegal to kill them."