pawnhouse

candy coated

the tongue trailed the
command of three other senses
yet gently refrained from the
forbidden.
the hands were less obedient.
and in they all dropped
to the abyss of sensation and
emotion.
another fall,
another embrace leading nowhere.

3 feb 98

character flux

head down before those that crucify
and mind vast yet void,
flesh and eye pale.
to my open wound the probing fingers
of now vacant friends,
fiends from demigods
malevolent votes cast.

creatures claw in instinctual attempts
at this molded face of clay.
all is allowed,
none is forgiving.
new sentiments form and stifle
incumbant patterns,
smoke rises to cloud the difference.

well hidden clutter amidst
the circles of discord;
trapped.
arrival of the hour to
discard
selfish emotion and
set free that which is
most wanted.

13 feb 98

flicking back and forth

kettle full of spoiled fluids
rancid to the taste
"you're not doing it right", he said
it's technique and timing,
fantasy and floorshow.
if it doesn't bubble up
it won't spill over
no "catch a shooting star"
no
drawing you from where your head is
rather collapsing on itself.
hold it in your resevoir,
collect and evaluate,
or
"i'll be forced to do it myself," she said
it's conjoined and constant,
gathered and gesture driven.

15 oct 98

tidal

the waters have been forsaken
compromised
and time has arrived for
seizures and gasping upon this land
compromised
endangered
due to the shift
of your heavenly body
walking and rolling
in the same place
where before i swam
compromised
and waiting for the pull

9 apr 98

smiling at the morning

i was lifted and put up high upon
song and symbolism
i was awoken after the sun had
risen for once
and for the first time
i had reason to
smile as my eyes opened.

into them poured a brilliance and
warmth that for this whole lifetime
i had craved,
with them i saw both love and power
flowing in a cycle.
sight.
insight.
light and beauty.
a happiness inexplicable
has brought this smile about
and i shall never regret mornings
again.

1 feb 99

(i'm giving this a try again...bare with me)

into the fortune of futures  (inspired by w.g.)
for she who showed me what everything means

to the smile i had from her presence each morning
for now bid farewell with the hurt that it lends
to the passion, the sanity,
and to the peace of its salvation
i've said a goodbye to the dearest of friends

as i took that hand into many directions
i paid no attention to where her eyes had been led
my companion my intentions
could not keep you smiling
for the actions did not follow all the words i had said

i did not see the pain all my love had inflicted
only the beauty of what you returned
just to hold you and tell you
of my regrets of blindness
is a most wanted feeling i can no longer earn

and i never knew
not until now do i recognize this
all the days i was spending mistakingly making you wait
hoping on my life and the fortune of future
that you will return to me before it's too late

in the light i will walk in the company of strangers
in the darkness i will hide with all the wisdom i've gained
forever knowing i wronged you
forever trying to make amends for that
with all of my soul until my energy's drained

i know the day comes when i will again smile with you
to retake your hand but with care not to lead
and to look straight ahead
side by side at forever
to turn and to kiss you with all burdens freed

17 may 99

back 1 room

communicate

downstairs