was about to write
a diatribe on how much my life sucks. But this morning, I had a donut.
It’s amazing how much your outlook on life can change once you’ve had a
donut.
Our work situation has gone from bad to intolerable. They are trying
to goad everyone into working 12-hour days -- indefinitely -- with no overtime
pay, of course. They keep promising us that things will get better, that
we’ll have bonuses and better working conditions and fewer hours and more
interesting projects in the future, but I’ve been here for five years,
and I’ve only seen things go in one direction – straight to hell.
But every once in a while, I get my hands on a donut, and its greasy,
sugary goodness infiltrates my bloodstream and makes me happy, at least
for a few hours or so.
Last night, I was listening to the
local Christian radio station on the way home from work. They don’t
actually play commercials, because they are funded exclusively by donations,
but they do have sort of public service messages, and short blurbs my prominent
Christian speakers. They played a short skit where a guy is sitting in
his office, talking to himself: "I promised my wife I wasn’t going to stay
late tonight. I won’t stay late; I won’t!" His boss comes by and says,
"Jenkins, can you stay late tonight?" "Sure, boss!" The moral, of course,
was that your use of time shows what your priorities are.
Right after that, there was a message from Chuck
Swindoll, and he had a series of quotes saying things like: one of
the biggest problems with man today is that he’s basically been turned
into a machine.
I don’t know how God does it, but though radio stations broadcast to
thousands of people, and preachers preach to hundreds, every so often something
comes along that is directed solely at me. And when you get a message straight
from God, you tend to take it seriously. So, I’m resolving to not worry
about work, and let it take care of itself. Maybe then, and only then,
will all of the pieces fall into place.
nd even if not, there
is always this.
This picture was taken last month, in a way I can't even imagine (I
don't even want to try). But it shows my first glimpse -- although
fuzzy -- of the child that will change the rest of my life. I debated
whether to put this here, but I figure it's debatedly the biggest thing
that has ever happened to me -- or at least one of the opening chapters
of the biggest thing -- so I'm kind of obligated.
Besides, I have to tell somebody about all of this. I haven't
even mentioned it to anyone at work. In my opinion, they don't even
deserve to know.
I know everyone will find out sooner or later, but since the people
at work seem more interested in products and testing and design than they
are in their own families, let alone in mine, they will probably find out
some day this summer when I go flying out of the office in a full-fledged
panic.
