October 4th
My quote of the day!
( Idea stolen from Tigerlily's page)
"Wasting time
I shall miss these things
When it all rolls by
What a day
Wanna stay, stay, stay, stay for awhile"
~~ Dave Matthews Band, 'Stay'
My thoughts.....
Well, here goes...i've begun realizing that my life needs to go somewhere. I feel like i'm stuck right here, right where i am, and i'm being left behind. It's not a good feeling knowing that you're friends are too busy for you...too caught up in their own lives to think of you. And even when you slap your feelings down in print and show them to them, it still doesn't work. They still don't get it. I guess i shouldn't group all of my friends into that category of being completely clueless. Not all of them are...in fact, i'm only really talking about a few of them, but those few are important to me. I think part of it is my fear of change...no matter how spontaneous and outgoing i think i am...when change means losing something, i'm not very good at dealing with it. Like these friends of mine. I became fairly close to them last semester, but apparently i didn't have as much of an impact on their lives as they did on mine. I keep finding myself dwelling on the past, thinking of all of the good times we had, and it just makes me cry cuz i know that we won't ever have times like that again. So i'm trying to deal with the change, and i'm trying to get some writing material out of it as well. Cuz that's what i want to be doing. I want to write and succeed and move on, just so i can feel like my life is going somewhere, because once again, i feel stuck and i have no idea how to break free from myself.