About the Operation

Rather than discuss the nasty outs and ins of the Operational Procedure, let me enlighten you with a few delightful views of our talented surgeons at work. Rest assured, you will be treated with the respect that you deserve, only to awaken in hours with a new bodily configurement and a nice cup of tea.

brain surgery operating theatre
Surgeons discuss the procedure with Nurse Egor

Here, seen in action for the first time, our host of intrepid neurosurgeons are about to set upon this willing victims body and connect it up with a freshly cloned head of their preference. This painless proceedure takes about ten hours with our revolutionary methods. Not even the need for an overnight stay. One can be out and about in no time to show off ones alternative cranium on the Golf Course.

plastic surgery procedure
Victim on slab awaiting fresh abnormal brain

One has the choice of a full head and neck set, including the intellectual Brain of your dreams, or maybe just the full face, half a hemisphere and frontal lobes. Its up to you.


Hanging the victim out to dry

Once the bandages and restraints are removed, you can begin your life again with only minimal side effects. All post operative medication is free of charge. Therapy is encouraged, but insanity is a small price to pay for bodily perfection!

Another Satisfied Customer


Before .... After

This very satisfied chap came in for a quick overhall and left with a devilish grin on his face, ready to be released into society and continue his life with renewed confidence and the strength of ten men. He absolutely growled with pleasure when he saw the delightful modifications, smashing his way thru the door in desperation to use his new talents on an defenceless metropolis.

The Proceedure


Jack makes sure you are in good hands

Initially, Jack and our Psycho-evaluation Squad will make a surprise visit to your home to assess you for this life threatening and changing sequence. Then, after the ceremonious forced signing of the waivers and your last-will, you would have handed your life over to Newhead.com, whereby you will be dragged away in the dead of night to our remote dungeon of dastardly deeds, to await attack by our chief psychopathic surgeon. The choice to back out is then expired.

Listen to Sounds from the Theater!

To put you at ease, our doctors have released some tapes from the Operating Theater. Listen to the soothing sounds as the chief surgeon makes the first incision.


.aiff (22k)
.wav (68k)

The Nasty Neurological Details

For those of you with a passing interest in part-time neuro-mutation, I have to confess that the actual operative procedure is rather nasty. But the Chief Surgeon has always believed in a good 'Hands on' involvement in brain manipulation. That squelchy grey dough reacts favourably to a bit of kneading to kick start it into action. Any residues and discarded brain tissue can be enjoyed later at a post operative feast, where doctors and patients congregate and dine over fried body parts, boiled brains, fava beans and a nice chianti.


Would you like ketchup with that, Sir?


HOME